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View Full Version : Spinoff: What funny things non-horse people say to YOU



Ritazza
Jan. 14, 2010, 07:18 AM
I was laughing at the threads on the H/J and Evening forums about using horse lingo to non-horsey people and I had a funny memory. Ever have a non-horsey person try really hard to use horsey lingo back to you, only they don't have a clue what they're talking about? I heard some good ones but my favorite by far:

My mother, who at the time was totally clueless about horses in general, while we were discussing vetting a horse with the horse's owner: "Oh well, we will need to vet this horse thoroughly. I mean, we can't take him if he's caught founder or anything."

Divine Comedy
Jan. 14, 2010, 08:19 AM
I once had a non-horse friend who wrote a story about horses way back when we were in middle school. As I distinctly recall, she wrote the following:

"The stallion pawed the ground with his muscular hoof."

I think I about died from LOL.

deltawave
Jan. 14, 2010, 08:22 AM
Maybe it reflects the popularity of the breed, or the area where I live, but when someone finds out I'm into horses, their first question is almost always "Quarter horses?". Or the second most popular: "You mean like equestrian?". :)

I am unfailingly nice when I answer (what I say really depends on my "read"--are they actually interested, or just making conversation?) because it always makes me sad when horse people roll their eyes and make fun of people who don't understand their world. :(

I might say something as simple as "I have jumping horses" which the not-really-interested can easily "get", or if they really seem to want some details I'll tell them what I really do. You know, shovel a lot of poop, write checks, throw hay, etc. ;)

hstone
Jan. 14, 2010, 08:59 AM
I was giving a tour of our farm in the summer and all horses were turned out with fly masks. One of the people in the group asked why we had all the horses blindfolded. I told him it made them more docile to handle.

purplnurpl
Jan. 14, 2010, 09:54 AM
I was at a barbecue at my friends house this summer. She and her husband are reiners.

they let me ride their stallion--do the spins and slides!! sooo fun.

two non horsie friends yelled at me from the rail:
"Make him sprint! "

:lol::lol::lol:

We still make fun of that one. In fact we have adopted the term and use it instead of gallop when talking.
***
When I talk to non horsie people I tell them I make my horsie prance around, jump the big colorful fences that fall down and then I pull a "man from snowy river" and jump of cliffs.

They like that explanation. lol.

Equa
Jan. 14, 2010, 09:59 AM
I knew some college boys who loved to watch Olympic dressage and drink beer and praise the "drunken trotting" (half pass) and the "mincing" (piaffe) and "prauncing" (passage). I have now taken Prauncing on as one of my favourites. I might start a dressage horse stud called "Prauncely Park".

smokescreen
Jan. 14, 2010, 10:05 AM
Mr. Smokescreen is a saint but not horsey at all. He was so proud of himself when he "harnessed the horse and led him into the pasture" when what he actually did was halter the horse and led him OUT of the pasture and into the paddock. Bless his heart.

missamandarose
Jan. 14, 2010, 10:10 AM
About a year ago, my incredibly non-horsey husband came with me to the barn, and watched ring-side while I rode the horse I was leasing. Half way through my ride, he unexpectedly says "Do a flying lead change!" I about skidded to a halt and looked at him with "Say WHAT?" plastered across my face. I asked him if he even knew what that was, and using his arms to demonstrate, he pretty much explained a flying lead change... in layman's terms. "Its when they're going like this (his right arm extended beyond the left), and then they kinda skip and then they're going like that (left arm extended beyond the right)

Not funny because he doesn't get it... funny because he knows exactly what he's talking about! (and yes, I totally picked a winner!)

Also, though not really a non-horsey person saying something specific, but a friend thought when I was talking about my horse's blanket I was talking about a quilt or an afghan throw. Hehe. She laughed hardily when I said "Oh! not THAT kind of blanket! its like a coat or a jacket, but for horses." She's an awesome friend, and always curious. :)

purplnurpl
Jan. 14, 2010, 10:24 AM
I was giving a tour of our farm in the summer and all horses were turned out with fly masks. One of the people in the group asked why we had all the horses blindfolded. I told him it made them more docile to handle.

ROFLMAO. OMG.

Jupes
Jan. 14, 2010, 12:05 PM
Because of inconsistent levels of success, I decided to stop eventing my horse as he got older. When I told my non-horsey husband about that decision, he said, "Oh no! You're not going to become a Dressage Queen?!"

...have no idea where he got that from, but it sure made me laugh. ;)

pday09
Jan. 14, 2010, 12:15 PM
Not entirely the same thing, but I was once giving a lecture about wrapping to a group of D1s in pony club who were really young, and when I asked "does anyone know why we wrap a horse's legs?" an enthusiastic young pony clubber said: "so the horses stand up straight!" I had to try SO hard not to laugh.

alakazam
Jan. 14, 2010, 12:22 PM
I've been with my BF for 9 years and he's learned a lot about riding and horse care. One day he had an upset stomach and said "Owee! I think I'm colicing!" I asked him if he wanted me to walk him :lol:

When I tell people that I have a horse, they say "oh, you must be loaded." I tell them that "no, I'm poor because I have a horse." They ususally look at me funny after that.

gully's pilot
Jan. 14, 2010, 12:32 PM
Slightly OT, best line by a pony clubber ever, during a rating. The examiner asked if the child was dressed formally or informally (pony club has very strict definitions of these terms). The child incorrectly said formally. In an effort to help her see that she'd answered wrong, the examiner said, "And why are you dressed formally?"

The child said, very politely, "Because they told me I had to, Ma'am."

RnR
Jan. 14, 2010, 12:42 PM
I always get a kick out of people saying, "Don't walk behind the horse, he could buck you!" I hear that a lot for some reason.

Phaxxton
Jan. 14, 2010, 12:52 PM
Several years ago, the vet was out at my (now former) barn for fall shots. I asked him to pull blood on my horses for an updated Coggins. The BARN OWNER (an actual horseperson) goes to the vet, "Do I really need to do that, too? I mean, have we even HAD a case of Coggins around here in the last 10 years?" :sigh::no:

mybelle
Jan. 14, 2010, 01:07 PM
My non-horsey friends always think I'm saying I'm going to the bar when I am actually going to the barn. All my friends must think I'm a drunk! :lol:

Blugal
Jan. 14, 2010, 01:17 PM
When I attended my first semester of University, I lived in dorms and kept my horse about 40 mins. away. I used to say to my dorm-mates, "I'm going out to see Blue," or "I'm going out to ride."

One of them told me that for the first couple months, she thought I had a bad-ass biker boyfriend named Blue.

Cheval Gris
Jan. 14, 2010, 01:18 PM
My non horsey husband sometimes watches my lessons or goes to shows. He always asks, "why do you hop up and down on the horse like that?" He has asked that many times :lol:

ILuvmyButtercups
Jan. 14, 2010, 01:35 PM
My all time favorite is when my son was just a tot, maybe 4 years old. We were standing by my gelding's stall, and that big boy relaxed his uh, thingy, made it hard. My son stared for the longest while..... and then asked:'

"Mommy, why does your horse have 5 legs?"

I thought I'd die laughing, just choked for hours!

Poor me, I had to tell him that wasn't a leg!

oharabear
Jan. 14, 2010, 01:42 PM
My non-horsey friends always think I'm saying I'm going to the bar when I am actually going to the barn. All my friends must think I'm a drunk! :lol:

LOL mine too. ;)

eventer_mi
Jan. 14, 2010, 01:43 PM
Non-horsey people all think horses are dead when they see them lying flat-out in the pasture.

Non-horsey people always ask me what kind of horse I have. I've given up telling them a specific breed and just say it's a brown one.

Was sitting in the stadium watching dressage during Rolex one year, when I overheard two people (one completely clueless, the other even more so but pretending to be knowledgeable), talking about the horse in the arena. The one asks the other, "What color do you call that?" and the other says, "Oh, he's a chestnut bay."

Jazzy Lady
Jan. 14, 2010, 01:46 PM
I had a friend comment on one of my dropping into water pictures where I was doing a hail mary with my whip say "you should put both your hands up in the air like you're riding a rollercoaster!"

Invested1
Jan. 14, 2010, 01:51 PM
My non-horsey friends always think I'm saying I'm going to the bar when I am actually going to the barn. All my friends must think I'm a drunk! :lol:

Ditto. :D

M. Owen
Jan. 14, 2010, 02:11 PM
I think my husband and my father contribute the best non-horsey comments in my life. My husband refers to posting as "hip thrusting." Blessedly he doesn't usually say this in front of people, it is more more of a question he asks when he is trying to remember the terminology "what do you call that hip thrusting thing again?" He also refers to the forelock as bangs which always makes me laugh, and dressage as prancing.

My father who spent many hours at barns, lessons, and horse shows while I was younger actually learned quite a bit, but could never remember the right terminology. He developed his own language instead:
- Flying changes = skips (he even managed to tell the difference between a complete change and cross cantering ,as in "I think you missed the skip behind.")
- chip a fence = stutter step (as in, that course looked okay, but did you have a stutter step at the last fence?)
- long distance = a leap (he never did quite catch on though that leaps are not all that desirable. He always thought they were very impressive and exciting to watch).

More recently, someone was asking me how horses do in the cold, and how do they stay warm. I said they wear blankets, and they asked if I meant a regular blanket you pick up at a store. It never occurred to me until that moment that it isn't obvious to people that horses would have specific blankets.

HER
Jan. 14, 2010, 03:02 PM
I don't have any great comments but I just love the totally glazed over, blank stare that I get when I tell people I event. Many of them are horse people too- just a very western area. I usually end up telling them I jump jumps that fall down and ones that don't, but I think I may switch to Purp's answer from now on!

Janet
Jan. 14, 2010, 03:19 PM
A former boyfriend used to ask if I was going to "line control" (as in "line control model airplanes")the horse, when he wanted to know if I was going to longe.

Atigirl
Jan. 14, 2010, 03:26 PM
Non horse friend actually thought that all black horses were stallions!:lol:

Same thing with the bar/barn confussion!

SmartAlex
Jan. 14, 2010, 03:29 PM
More recently, someone was asking me how horses do in the cold, and how do they stay warm. I said they wear blankets, and they asked if I meant a regular blanket you pick up at a store. It never occurred to me until that moment that it isn't obvious to people that horses would have specific blankets.

It must really confuse people in England when they are told the horse wears a rug. ;)

spaceagejuliet
Jan. 14, 2010, 03:37 PM
Upon hearing I have a horse, people light up and are often proud to show their vocabulary skills by using the word 'equestrian.'

Sadly most of the time it shows up something like this: "Oh, so you do equestrian riding, huh?"

I ALWAYS have to bite my lip to avoid saying, "No, but my boyfriend does."

blazing saddles
Jan. 14, 2010, 03:37 PM
I am unfailingly nice when I answer (what I say really depends on my "read"--are they actually interested, or just making conversation?) because it always makes me sad when horse people roll their eyes and make fun of people who don't understand their world. :(

I might say something as simple as "I have jumping horses" which the not-really-interested can easily "get", or if they really seem to want some details I'll tell them what I really do. You know, shovel a lot of poop, write checks, throw hay, etc. ;)

Very nice answer. With that said, I'm actually not the career rider myself, my girlfriend is. But I grew up in pony club and horses have always been a big part of my family, so I like to think I get by just fine. But our non horse friends know nothing about it. They are always asking how my girlfriend did at her 'race' over the weekend. It's so far removed from anything in there lives but it's nice that they try and show interest at least. Some have even come to see her compete at FairHill Int in the fall. They all loved it.

Encourage non horse fans, it can only help the sport IMO!

Milocalwinnings
Jan. 14, 2010, 03:48 PM
A girl from my high school's yearbook approached me one day asking if she could interview me because she knew I had horses. She asked all sorts of questions- what breed, what kind of riding I do, etc. I couldn't wait to read the article...until I actually saw it :no:

She said, and I quote, "Shannon competes in eventing which consists of 3 parts. The first is Dressage, also known as obedience training...." "...and the last part is where she races cross country." :eek:
Then she said "Shannon and Milo went to a jumper show this summer. She placed 7th out of 22 people. Shannon said she felt nervous before the jumping race began but was happy with how they did."OMG...just OMG! I never said anything about racing or obedience training! Where the girl got that, I have no idea... and it shows that she certainly didn't put any research effort into the article! I was horrified- most of the people at my school are non horsey, but I did have a couple of teachers who DID ride/know what they were talking about and I'm sure they thought I needed a few lessons!

purplnurpl
Jan. 14, 2010, 03:49 PM
I started riding when I was 15.
That year my mother and I went to the Festival of Champions at the USET Headquarters in Gladstone (I'm from NJ).

We sat for hours watching the GP Kur (one of my FAVORITES!).

I remember sitting down amongst the many people while a rider was in the arena doing and FEI test. I exclaimed, "OMG does that rider know she is on the wrong lead???!!!"

Now, so many years later, I'm so awkwardly embarrassed for myself.

*****

and in highschool I would go to the barn with my best bud after school so often things needed to be brought with and kept in my locker.
I arrived one day and said, [out loud in the hallway between classes]
"Oh shit, I forgot my breast plate"
Cathy looked at me and said, "OMG Kristen shut up!"

To a non horsie person that might sound really bad...

oldpony66
Jan. 14, 2010, 04:47 PM
Thanks for this thread! I needed a laugh today!

I, too, had a co-worker tell me about how sad she was for some horses that she would pass on the way to work because they were all blindfolded. She was so relieved when I told her they were fly masks!

A lot of non-horsey people I meet are simply amazed that my horses don't have shoes. They think all horses MUST have shoes on.

We had a small pony for my daughter when she was younger. Naturally we often were asked how old the pony was and when it would be "full sized".

But my MIL provides the most challenges. She really does try to understand, but she guesses things instead of just asking for explanations. Like the first time seeing shipping boots on a pony, she asked "Are you afraid her legs will get cold?" and it's cute, whenever the farrier is here she says the horses are "getting their toes done" because she forgets the word "hooves".

Ajierene
Jan. 14, 2010, 05:11 PM
A friend of my sister was talking about horses and how his younger sister had an interest. She mentioned that I trained horses for a living (I did at the time). He was stunned and replied that he thought horses were born knowing how to be ridden....

She also wisely suggested to him to tell his parents to send their daughter for riding lessons before just buying her a horse. At the time she showed interest but had never really been near a horse. About three lessons later she lost interest.

Flying Hill
Jan. 14, 2010, 05:14 PM
My non-horsie but extremely nice and reliable neighbors occasionally look after my horses if I am out of town. Once, when the weather changed unexpectedly, I got a call asking me if they should put on the horses' winter coats instead of their windbreakers. :) Now I leave them instructions regarding the various "coats," "rain-gear" and "sweaters."

I had a boyfriend who was a champion saddlebred rider as a kid. I took him to an event once and during dressage warm-up asked him how my mare looked as I trotted by. He yelled across the warm-up, "She's got a real nice head-set there." Ughhh.

As for the bar/barn thing: I met my first husband in a barNNNNN!

NeverTime
Jan. 14, 2010, 05:18 PM
My non-horsey roommate used to ask me this question about riding, or variations on it:
"How was your horsing?"
"How are things at the horsery?"

I think, if I ever have a barn of my own, I will call it "The Horsery" in his honor!

albigears
Jan. 14, 2010, 05:33 PM
When people say, "I rode a horse once and it bucked me."

And, "Oh you have horses? Do you listen to country music?"

I was talking to a girlfriend about longing one day, and 5 minutes later as we were walking away my boyfriend informed me he hadn't understood a single word we had said.

Janet
Jan. 14, 2010, 05:40 PM
Sadly most of the time it shows up something like this: "Oh, so you do equestrian riding, huh?" Blame that on the Olympics, since they have decided "Equestrian" is the name of the sport for the FEI disciplines. And the Olympics is probably where most people see riding.

Ritazza
Jan. 14, 2010, 05:42 PM
Hahahaha this is great!

In relation to the "oh do you have QHs then?" I always get this one EVERY time I trailer anywhere, EVERY time I stop for gas: "Is that a race horse? Do you race?" How do you explain to someone who thinks that all horses are racehorses what eventing is!?

spaceagejuliet
Jan. 14, 2010, 06:08 PM
Have you ever had someone tell you about the great pair of 'riding boots' they just got at Macy's? Doesn't this make you wince?

yellowbritches
Jan. 14, 2010, 06:14 PM
My non-horsey friends always think I'm saying I'm going to the bar when I am actually going to the barn. All my friends must think I'm a drunk! :lol:
A few years ago, a horsey friend and I went downtown for drinks, etc, one evening. We ended up chatting with a couple of guys, and when the subject of jobs came up she said she did blah blah blah (some sort of real world job that they got immediately). When I was asked I said I was a barn manager. The conversation continued, they both thought that seemed like a hard job (yes). Long hours (yes). Lots of late night (wait...not so much.). Is it as tough as the restaurant business? Wait a second. Turns out, they thought I said BAR manager, so I had to explain to them that, no, while my job occasionally drives me to drink, I am a HORSE FARM manager, which continued to take explaining (you manage those???).

So, from that point on I've always said I manage a horse farm. That clicks a little faster, but still usually requires a lot of questions on what exactly that means. :lol: Especially in this area (DC metro), where if you don't work for the government, a law firm, aren't in IT, or work in IT for a law firm that does something for the government, then most people can't figure you out. :lol:

khp vol
Jan. 14, 2010, 06:28 PM
We get a LOT of this at the Horse Park. My Favorites:

"Was John Henry's father a gelding, too?"

"Why was Secretatiat buried in France?"When I gave the visitor my best blank stare, he said "I heard he was buried outside of Paris".
Paris, KY is about 15 miles east of the Horse Park.

My favorite: A woman came up to me, furtively looked both directions, and quietly said "I hear horses have 3 sexes:stallion, mare, and gelding. How do they make babies?"

dixiedolphin
Jan. 14, 2010, 06:54 PM
"How are things at the horsery?"

LOL! I love this! "The Horsery." Must remember to slip that into conversation someday. :lol:

Like so many others, and also seeing as about 75%+ of the people I know are musicians or in the music industry, I have a very hard time explaining that I'm going to the BARN and not the BAR. They just look so baffled when I tell them I have to get up early and get to the barn in the morning. "But the bars don't open that early!" Ha! It doesn't help that there was a venue around here called "The Barn" either.

While wearing my breeches & boots, I've also been asked by strangers if I was headed to an S&M fetish party. LOL! They're pretty popular in this town, apparently!

I am very pleased, though... my completely non-horsey boyfriend correctly predicted the winner of the Kentucky Derby last year and chastised me for not paying enough attention when I admitted that I had forgot to watch it. And when I took him to see the Lipizzaners this month, he was actually able to pick up on some of the proper terms for dressage movements. Now.. if only I could break him of the habit of calling his computer's harddrive 'a memory.' :D

Sillymoose
Jan. 14, 2010, 07:50 PM
My sister has a friend who's father owns a racehorse. She knows just enough about horses to sound ridiculous, and since the moment she found out my sister has horses, she's intent on sounding like she knows what she's talking about. For example.

She went and visited another friend of hers that has a horse and was really impressed with the horse. The next time she was saw my sister she was raving about how well trained and awesome the horse was. My sister asked what breed it was. She said "It's a Chestnut Walker". My sister thinking she was talking about a TWH that is chestnut said "Oh you mean a Tennessee Walker" She replied "No, it's a Chestnut Walker. You know. The kind that picks up its' feet when you squeeze it's chestnuts." :lol:

Then the other day she and my sister were talking horses. Friend said "OMG, if I could have any horse it would be a Chesapeake Bay." My sister said, "hmmm... isn't that a dog?" She was like "no its not." Sister says, "umm... I'm pretty sure it is. Go look it up." So she did and just could not believe that it's not a horse. lol.

Oh the funny things people say.

eventingismylife
Jan. 14, 2010, 08:02 PM
My all time favorite is when my son was just a tot, maybe 4 years old. We were standing by my gelding's stall, and that big boy relaxed his uh, thingy, made it hard. My son stared for the longest while..... and then asked:'

"Mommy, why does your horse have 5 legs?"

I thought I'd die laughing, just choked for hours!

Poor me, I had to tell him that wasn't a leg!

ROFL. I ran into that situation with my little sisters....

Flying Hippotamus
Jan. 14, 2010, 08:04 PM
Years ago I was at a small riding club horse show. I heard 2 people talking while they were looking at my horse. "what are those things on his legs?" (chestnuts) I don't remember if the knowledgeable horse person gave the name but she told what they were for - "they are where the legs are attached together when the foal is inside his mother. It's God's way of keeping their legs from getting tangled." Welp, if you know nothing, everything is a miracle...

Another one a saw a friend of a friend once a year at he kids b'day party. The subject of horses usually came up. She would announce I had a horse once and for about three years in a row I would forget this conversation and ask "Oh really what kind?" "A brown gelding." she would proudly reply. Okaaay, nevermind.

Cheval Gris
Jan. 14, 2010, 08:21 PM
Why is it that everytime you pull into a gas station some old dude asks if those are 'race horses' in there? Hmmm. And then when you tell people you ride, they always tell you they used to ride a horse named apple, or something along those lines...

ShayDarra
Jan. 14, 2010, 08:25 PM
A lady I met recently (who said she rode a lot??) asked if I "rode western or equestrian"? I merely replied that I jumped and did dressage and that ended the conversation.

SD

Gryhrs
Jan. 14, 2010, 08:29 PM
My non-horsey friends will ask why I still need lessons after all these years...."don't you already know how to ride?" Wish I did!

Cheval Gris
Jan. 14, 2010, 08:34 PM
Gryhrs.....OMG my husband and father ask me every time I get a lesson why I still need lessons. My husband is worse, especially since the money comes out of his account.

dixiedolphin
Jan. 14, 2010, 08:39 PM
My non-horsey friends will ask why I still need lessons after all these years...."don't you already know how to ride?" Wish I did!

Ditto this. I had to explain to my non-horsey boyfriend once that, unlike music lessons which you can eventually do on your own out of books, you pretty much NEVER stop needing to take riding lessons. ;)

SuperEventer
Jan. 14, 2010, 08:53 PM
During college, I worked at a local feed/tack store.... People used to come in looking for tack for their horses, but they would have no clue what size they would need.....so I would try to question them about said horse to see if I could figure out what size they might possibly need. Two different funny things that I remember...

Me: What breed of horse is it?
Customer #1: A registered Bay
Me: Umm...you mean, a Cleveland Bay?
Customer #1: No, just a registered Bay.

Hmmmmmmmm.....


Me: How tall is your horse?
Customer #2: Oh, he's really big. He's 16.5 hands tall.
Me: Oooh, really?


Also, during college, I HATED going to Walmart in my breeches and boots, due to all of the stares. However, my friends always seemed to drag me there just after riding. One trip, I was standing at the $5 DVD bin and a 'country' man walks up to me and starts talking...

Man: Are they havin' pony rides here?
Me: Huh?
Man: Are they havin' pony rides here?
Me: Um, I don't know.
Man: Well, why are you wearin' them there leggins then?

I'm sure I turned bright red as my friends all burst out laughing....

PnkPanthr
Jan. 14, 2010, 08:54 PM
A bunch of people I know think i work at a "bar"...not a "barn":lol:

Since we get a lot of young kids at our barn, we get really un horse saavy kids as well as parents. Heres some examples

1. One of our school horses walked out of the barn, there was one child that swore she knew what the horses name was..so preceded to yell "SNOWWWYYY!!" across the indoor. As the girl holding the horse stopped, she turned to the kid, and said No, this is Peaches. We have never had a horse named Snowy at our barn. Ever.

2. Whenever the kids see horses with fly masks, EVERY SINGLE ONE gasps and says :eek:IS HE BLIND??:eek:.....no.

3. One of my personal favorites is when the non horse people ask me.. "So when's your next race?"

4. My all time favorite..is a little girl we had for an introductory program..she was so unhorse-saavy it blew my mind. Any ways, i was teaching the kids how to tack up...and going over how to know if the saddle was up far enough...so I pointed to the withers and asked them if anyone knew what it was called(I knew some of them knew it, because we had some kids who did the program twice)..and the girl looked at me..I said it starts with a W...the girl looks at me and goes.. Rump!! I look at her and tell her, Well, thats an R...try again...thinks again and yells RUCKUS!!(horse in the stall next to her, that I have never told her about)..nope thats still an R, and a horses name..Finally, I was too close to tears of laughter, so I gave up and told them withers.:lol:

Sithly
Jan. 14, 2010, 09:27 PM
Just had a new one today. Non-horsey acquaintance who is also a volunteer firefighter asked where I worked. I told him the name of my barn, and he said, "Oh, I've been there! I went out there a few years ago for an injury call!" I was all :eek:, and he continued, "Yeah, there are quite a few barns in that area -- I've been to all of them!"

Apparently us Equestrian Riders are notorious for our accidents!






"Oh, so you do equestrian riding, huh?"

I ALWAYS have to bite my lip to avoid saying, "No, but my boyfriend does."

*snerk!* :lol:


My non-horsey roommate used to ask me this question about riding, or variations on it:
"How was your horsing?"
"How are things at the horsery?"

I think, if I ever have a barn of my own, I will call it "The Horsery" in his honor!

Love it!

Horsegal984
Jan. 14, 2010, 09:28 PM
Went to college in a really small town, the biggest thing there was the school with a huge equestrian program.

My friend and I had to run to Walmart after our lesson, still in our tall boots and breeches.

Random Guy- "Where do you work that you have to dress like THAT?"
Us- "We ride"
Guy- "Ride WHAT???"
Us- "Horses"

He was suddenly much less interested in what we did with our free time. ;)

VanEq
Jan. 14, 2010, 09:32 PM
When I was about 10 my family owned a space at one of those RV resort places. It offered trail rides in the mornings at various experience levels. By this time I already had a horse of my own and had been riding for about three years, but this particular resort was like... its' own little universe or something. Lots of families lived there full-time and many even had their own horses, but it was kind of one of those things where no one had ever heard of taking lessons-- the older kids "taught" the younger kids how to ride (badly).

My grandmother had signed me up for an advanced trail ride (it involved CANTERING!! Whooo!! And HILLS!!) and I was walking to the hitching post, wearing breeches and boots. A pack of kids were sitting on the arena fence watching their friends ride, and they all turned to look at me. One of them shouted "look at her, wearing jockey pants!!" To which they all laughed hysterically.

Twenty years later I'm still trying to think of a good response to that.

mbarrett
Jan. 14, 2010, 09:54 PM
I once took to work a photo of my horse and myself jumping over an itty-bitty cross country fence at a horse trials. Everyone at work wanted to see my pictures after they asked what I did that summer Of course, I had on my cross country attire, which to John Q. Public looks like a jockey outfit.

One person said, "they didn't know I raced" and asked if I was a jockey and another asked if that was at the Grand National, like in National Velvet. Other times they want to know if I ride with Princess Anne or the Queen. (Yeah, they were over to my place last week!)

A lot of times people ask me if they can come out to the barn and ride my horse. They always want to "run him".

Ugh, I quit talking about my horse activities at work.

EventerMeg
Jan. 14, 2010, 10:16 PM
These are all wicked funny! :D

My roommate once asked if I rode "saddleback". I almost died laughing.




-Meg

jawa
Jan. 14, 2010, 10:32 PM
My mother called the girth a girdle!! "Don't forget to tighten the girdle."

BEEBER
Jan. 14, 2010, 10:37 PM
When my son is out in public wearing his breeches, tall socks and sneakers, he's always asked what position he plays, as in baseball!

KaBoom!
Jan. 15, 2010, 06:31 AM
I lived in a very small logging town growing up. Most had never seen an english saddle. I was asked "If you teach that horse to jump how are you going to keep him in your pasture?"

teddygirl
Jan. 15, 2010, 07:14 AM
My sister was trying to buy me a gift without understanding the horse stuff, and I told her I needed some new splint boots. So she called the tack shop and asked them for horse booties! She thought they went over the hooves. I wish I had been there for that conversation!

pinkdiamondracing
Jan. 15, 2010, 07:31 AM
I work part-time at a convenience store, and two of the girls I work with love horses, but know absolutely nothing about them. We get a lot of horse people in as customers, and lots of them we know by first name. One of the girls who comes in is a friend of mine and does her own horseshoeing, and the girls I work with have also become friends with this woman. One day one of the co-workers was describing to me about the day she watched Dana ( the customer) "clip the horse's nails":lol::lol:
I almost died laughing, and so did Dana!!!
We then proceeded to explain the proper terminology.

graytbmare
Jan. 15, 2010, 09:12 AM
When I decided to move to KY for a year for a working student position, no one could seem to understand what was going on.
I got very serious nods with "Yep, thats where you have to go if you want to to become a jockey."

My dad asked me if that meant that I was going to have to get a real saddle (only ones with horns are "real" to him) so he could ride my horse...

And on the shipping of my horse: "Cant you just ride it there?" "No, there is no way to plug in the GPS..."

But my favorite from a little girl at the old barn: "Ooo are you going to get to ride Secretariat?" I couldnt bring myself to tell her the truth...

Threedaychick
Jan. 15, 2010, 10:39 AM
This thread is hilarious!
My boyfriend is a wonderful sport about horses and helps out at the barn. When we went to a fancy restaurant one night, he looked at me totally serious and asks "what is a horse doovrey?" I just looked at him confused.. wondering where he had heard that term.. turns out he wanted to know what an hors d'oeurve is!
Now we always joke that I smell like a horse doovrey when I get back from the barn.

EventingDiva
Jan. 15, 2010, 11:08 AM
These are too funny! :lol:

I too have had many similar comments made to me!

A few of my friends just don't get the "horse thing". After high school, the summer before college, a few of us went out and started talking about summer/part time jobs, etc. I told them I was going to start working at a horse store-just to put it in simple terms for them and left it at that. They all just kind of stared at me. My sophomore year of college I reconnected with one of my high school friends I had lost touch with at a party. She asked me "are you still working at the whore store?" I almost died. Apparently for two year all of my high school friends thought I was working at a "whore store" and never asked! haha

When I was younger my grandfather used to drive me to the barn after school. Every day I would try to teach him about riding. His main question would be "what is the area you ride in called?" I swear we must have gone over this 100 times on several different occasions-an arena, a ring, etc. This Christmas I decided to test him to see if he remembered these conversations from 15-10 years ago. He proudly announced that he remembered and that I rode in a "rink". I shook my head and appropriately handed him his Christmas present which was the book "Horses for Dummies". ;)

LuckyStar
Jan. 15, 2010, 11:25 AM
My six year old daughter is a great sport about tagging along to the barn with me. When we tell people where we spent the afternoon, they constantly ask what is wrong with me that I take Lilly to the BAR.

She has also picked up on some pseudo-horse lingo. If she or someone in her kindergarten class misses school, she says that they were ABSCESSED (absent).

We walked into the tack shop just the other day looking for something for my husband's clydesdale. Lilly walked right up to the owner and said "excuse me, do you have anything GIRAFFE size?" (Draft size)

ntoeventing
Jan. 15, 2010, 11:50 AM
Here's another one... I was sitting in the stadium at Rolex one year watching the show jumping, and at the beginning of the ride, the announcer stated that this paticular rider had "a rail in hand". I heard a couple of ladies behind me quielty discussing what that phrase meant. So, they asked a person near them who stated that "a rail in hand referred to the rider's whip."

Rolex has been the site of many interesting interpretations of "horsey" lingo.

badawg
Jan. 15, 2010, 12:30 PM
I live in MT, obviously not a hugely english riding area...soooo, people often get to talking about their horses. When they find out that I ride and show, they just assume that I am a barrel racer. I don't know why this annoys the crap out of me, but it does. I suppose that if I were smarter, I would take the sport up-they can make some good money! But, when I tell them I'm an english rider, I usually get a sad nod and smile and they quickly try to change the subject. Here in ranch country, english riding is just foolishness! Only the yuppies with too much time and money on their hands do that kind of thing...Sheesh!

BigHorseLittleHorse
Jan. 15, 2010, 12:42 PM
Upon hearing I have a horse, people light up and are often proud to show their vocabulary skills by using the word 'equestrian.'

Sadly most of the time it shows up something like this: "Oh, so you do equestrian riding, huh?"

I ALWAYS have to bite my lip to avoid saying, "No, but my boyfriend does."

HA!

Zephyr
Jan. 15, 2010, 01:46 PM
This might just be the funniest thread ever!

x10 on the "bar/barn" confusion...

I guess I've phased almost everyone non-horsey out of my life, b/c I haven't heard any good ones in a while!! The "girth/girdle" confusion sounds exactly like something my mom would have said to me in high school though.

Some family members were in town recently for the holidays, and I was giving my 16yo cousin a "pony ride" on the lead line. My aunt was incredulous when I told her about my lessons - "You still take LESSONS??!?!? What more can you learn after 20 years????" :D

I've been slowly transforming my non-horsey husband into a horsey one. He still can't remember the right word for "halter" most of the time :) But I was just about blown away when he used the word "noseband" correctly!!!! Now he even knows the difference between plain and figure-8!

Nomini
Jan. 15, 2010, 09:16 PM
These are hilarious! I have one to add. My dad, who is awesome, has been carting me to events since I was teeny tiny and now drives to wherever I'm competing and meets me there to watch/help. Over the years he has developed a good sense of what's going on (especially if it was really good or really bad).

One of the best things he ever said though was after my first training level dressage test. When I came out of the ring, he said that my horse looked really good, except for "that part where she took off with you across the ring trotting really funny". I had to explain to him that was an (albeit very poor at the time) trot lengthening!

Bravestrom
Jan. 15, 2010, 09:42 PM
I was showing my then 2 yr old stud colt at the royal this year and he decided to show his wares - he was 17.2hh as a 2 yr old and his wares are very substantial let me tell you - anyway a husband and wife (I think) were passing me and the wife said - "Oh My" - the husband turned to her and said "Oh Honey - in the dark you wouldn't know any difference".

I had such a smile on my face when I went into the ring.

Sportsfield24
Jan. 15, 2010, 11:09 PM
I get this one a lot.."So are you going to be in the Olympics?" I just reply, that no, I am not going to be in the Olympics bc I am not that good of a rider. Then they feel bad for me. Though I am totally ok with it, of course! Then they are usually like, "So if you are not going to the Olympics, why do you keep doing this eventing thing?". I am not sure..what do you say at that point? Secondly, we have a boarder at my barn and they are new to horses..so the other night it was pretty cold and the Mom asked me if they needed to put Chatham's jacket on tonight? I thought that was really cute.

Sportsfield24
Jan. 15, 2010, 11:13 PM
I asked my husband what he thought about my dressage test. He's been around this eventing awhile and this is what he came up with. He replied, "Well, I think it was really good bc your horse's head never came up and her head wasn't bouncing around all over the place looking side to side." Great.

_downpour_
Jan. 15, 2010, 11:53 PM
Teehee, I love this thread!

- of course I've had the "Why do you need lessons? I thought you could ride already" on several occasions, as well as "oh horse riding is easy/not a sport" etc etc.

-my friend used to call jodhpurs 'rompers', still makes me laugh! They like to call breeches 'tights' as well which isn't so bad, but still funny.

-another friend watched me ride once and asked "why do you do that humping thing when they run" - referring to the posting trot.

-My grey pony & my friends (much larger) grey pony were standing together between classes, and her Dad came up and fed MY pony an apple - he thought it was her pony! Haha, color similarities, but that was where it ended!

- "races"... "when's your next race?".... "How'd your race on the weekend go?"... Hello, I actually do hunters?

-My mothers friend was horrified by the Dressage at the Athens olympics she watched on tv - "why is there all that white stuff coming from their mouthes? They look like they're terrified and stressed out, it's just cruel".

-natural horsemanship protoge "you can't put shoes or rugs on your horses. It's not natural, and it will kill them"... uhh, last time I checked, RIDING them wasn't natural either but that's not stopping you??

-counter canter - I've heard the 'wrong lead' comment a few times on that one too.

Mac123
Jan. 16, 2010, 12:14 AM
I ride jumpers, and after all these years, my dad still asks me about my "races" instead of classes.

He knows what horse racing is and what I do and how they are different...but still, it hasn't clicked. :rolleyes:

Tobias
Jan. 16, 2010, 12:57 AM
Wow this hilarious!!!!!

I have heard the barn/bar thing too. when I told people that I worked at a barn they (my youth pastor and many people who don't agree with drinking) always asked me why I worked at a BAR. :lol:

Also My youth pastor was doing a lesson on influences, asking us what tv shows, or movies or magazines we look at. I said that mine were good I get Horse Illustrated...their jaws dropped! they thought I said Sports Illustrated. :eek:

mswillie
Jan. 16, 2010, 12:59 AM
And, "Oh you have horses? Do you listen to country music?"



I had this happen just the other day. A co-worker and I were chatting and she mentioned a song she likes. I said that I hadn't heard it as I really don't care for pop music.

She told me she thought I must like country music because I have a horse. I had to break it to her that I detest country and western music.

Maya01
Jan. 16, 2010, 09:22 PM
My non-horsey friends always think I'm saying I'm going to the bar when I am actually going to the barn. All my friends must think I'm a drunk! :lol:

lmao I get that a lot too.

My family knows nothing about horses "So you do that hoppy thing with the horse where you go up in the air and run around, right?"
I am never sure how to respond to those questions.

ILuvmyButtercups
Jan. 16, 2010, 10:23 PM
Non horse friend actually thought that all black horses were stallions!:lol:

Same thing with the bar/barn confussion!


:lol::lol:, When I was a tiny tot I never missed a single episode of "Fury", remember that '50s TV show? Fury was a black stallion, and then there was the Flicka series, with Thunder I think, a white stallion being the BIG HOSS. Forever I thought all black or white horses were stallions.... but then again, I didn't know what a stallion was, at all!

And then one day my mom told me they are male horses. Whaaa?????? That's ALL????????? Just ordinary males?????
I was CRUSHED! :no::cry:

yventer
Jan. 16, 2010, 10:58 PM
[QUOTE=purplnurpl;4618684] I remember sitting down amongst the many people while a rider was in the arena doing and FEI test. I exclaimed,

"OMG does that rider know she is on the wrong lead???!!!"


Now that has to be one of the top quotes of the (new) decade!!!!

yventer
Jan. 16, 2010, 11:08 PM
Gryhrs.....OMG my husband and father ask me every time I get a lesson why I still need lessons. My husband is worse, especially since the money comes out of his account.

I'm exercising a client's horse while she recovers from a hysterectomy. When her husband asked her why she wasn't riding the horse herself, she pointed with both hands! And we agreed that if he'd had testicle surgery he wouldn't have forgotten so readily!

yventer
Jan. 16, 2010, 11:17 PM
Teehee, I love this thread!
-counter canter - I've heard the 'wrong lead' comment a few times on that one too.

Better yet a comment watching the 1984 dressage, on canter pirourette: "His hind legs are moving - wait - they scored that a 9?!?!"

(From a reining fan.)

Rescue_Rider9
Jan. 16, 2010, 11:24 PM
I always get asked about the "Why do you need lessons after riding for so long" I always reply with "The same reason Major leauge baseball players have a coach" I grew up in a baseball family, but this reason would work with any sport as every sport has a coach!

Tuckertoo
Jan. 16, 2010, 11:57 PM
Haha, I get the bar/barn thing sometimes, too, except sometimes people actually think I'm saying "barn," it's just that apparently there's a local-ish bar named "The Barn," so they still think I'm going drinking. :rolleyes::lol: I'm 17, so I get funny looks.

I haven't gotten any memorable quotes, although I thought of this thread today when my friend asked me what I did in my riding lessons. I was like, "Well...you ride around...and then you do stuff...and, um...you do different things and the instructor tells you what to do...." It's surprisingly hard to explain when people really have no idea what goes on. I ended up just saying, "It's like music lessons, or lessons for other sports. You go, work on old things, learn some new things, practice at home, and go back again for more."

jane20008
Jan. 17, 2010, 12:55 AM
Practicing for a Pony Club know-down, one question was: "what does 'gone to ground" mean? One little girl answered: That is when you fall off your pony. I always liked her best! = )

Thames Pirate
Jan. 17, 2010, 01:24 AM
"I can't. My horse is getting shod this afternoon."
"Your horse is getting SHOT!?" I get this one practically every time I say the word "shod."

My SO, whose mother runs a rescue ranch and who once was in charge of a 40 horse stable, is surprisingly knowledgeable. He has decided that any show or XC schooling or jumping lesson is a "jumparoo." So I'll come home and he'll ask, "how was your jumparoo?"

I get the "do you race" thing a ton, and I get the "equestrian" thing. I've also gotten the bar/barn mistake.

I also worked at a Christian boys' camp as horseback director for several summers. We had a gelding who liked mounting this one mare who was in season. She didn't seem to mind and they weren't getting hurt, so I let it go (limited options for turnout). People would come up to me and tell me my horses were "doing it," wanting me to break it up. I kindly reminded them that getting between two 1000 lb horny animals was NOT my idea of a good time and that as he was gelded, there wouldn't be any problems. The tennis instructor once saw a gelding drop, at which point he loudly exclaimed, "now I know why they call it hung like a horse!" I could only laugh, as he was the camp 'stud' as far as the ladies over at girls' camp were concerned.

One summer we also had a counselor find out that we (assistant director and I--both female) were going to be sheath cleaning that afternoon. We explained that we were checking for beans and why it was important. The next day at staff meeting we won the award for grossest job of the week (the only time it has ever been awarded BEFORE a deed was done) as it was announced that we would be "picking beans" in front of a group of high school/college aged boys. Talk about a good laugh! "Picking beans" was apparently all we did at the barn for the next three summers and became a euphemism for all things gross in camp terminology.

That's all that comes to mind at the moment.

rideforthelaurels16
Jan. 17, 2010, 02:50 AM
My all time favorite is when my son was just a tot, maybe 4 years old. We were standing by my gelding's stall, and that big boy relaxed his uh, thingy, made it hard. My son stared for the longest while..... and then asked:'

"Mommy, why does your horse have 5 legs?"

I thought I'd die laughing, just choked for hours!

Poor me, I had to tell him that wasn't a leg!

:lol: I was a camp counselor for a couple of summers, and in one session was teaching a group of 5-7 year olds about grooming. Same situation, same question - I had to think really fast and told them that it's a special leg for racehorses that helps them run faster in a race ;)

JFS
Jan. 17, 2010, 08:26 AM
This thread is the best.

It got me to thinking of some of the words my father made up for some horsey things. He always referred to jodhpurs as "jompers" and surcingles were "surgicles".

A few years ago I was teaching a little boy and we were reviewing the parts of the saddle. When we got to the cantle he was stuck so I gave him a hint that it started with the letter "C". He suddenly got a big smile on his face and said "o yeah it's the CAMEL!" I just cracked up and everytime after that when I asked him what teh cantle was called we both would crack up.

JAckie

Beam Me Up
Jan. 17, 2010, 06:18 PM
I hope this one is ok to post . . .

I was leading a horse (an Arab/WBx) on a windy day. Head up, tail up, dancing around, then we had a huge snort/leap at some trash cans.

I said, "he's such an Arab today!"
My non-horsey SO looked at me with utter disgust, and said "I can't believe you would say something so stupid and ignorant."

Stopped me in my tracks--who knew he was such an Arabian fan--or actually knew any horse breeds at all.

Until I realized he thought I was making some sort of ethnic remark. I felt so bad!

hldyrhrses
Jan. 17, 2010, 06:26 PM
Why is it that everytime you pull into a gas station some old dude asks if those are 'race horses' in there?

I'm a 7th grade teacher and every year my students just naturally assume I'm a jockey because I ride. Even when I explain that I event and what that is, they ask me every week how my race went!

ClassAction
Jan. 17, 2010, 06:47 PM
Some of my friends have been entirely confused by the pony-horse difference. At first they thought that ponies and horses were two different species. Then they thought ponies were baby horses who would grow more. Finally, it got through to them that ponies are equines that are shorter than horses. For PhD students it took a while though.

And my mom still calls jumps "hurdles."

redhorse5
Jan. 17, 2010, 07:31 PM
Non horsey husband asked the other day when trying to help if one of the guys needed their sweater under their rain jacket.

I don't usually watch much TV but I'm recovering from another surgery and was flipping through the channels. One of those cute teenage horse movies was on and it was hilarious with all the misinformation. They were training a retired TB to make a comback at the "BIG RACE" by jumping him over cross rails... They took the horse to a jumper show where all the competitors were wearing silks. Then their dream of winning the KY Derby took place with palm trees everywhere. The winning horse was a Quarter Horse with a really long mane and the long lost sire of the winner looked to be an aged gelding Freisian. I almost lost my lunch.

Ajierene
Jan. 17, 2010, 07:34 PM
So...I was driving back from a meeting with three other colleagues. One colleague started asking horse related questions and the subject of horse shoes came up. I was explaining my mare's flat feet and why she wears shoes, as well as some reasons why I pull shoes for the winter.

I mentioned something about mud sucking horse shoes off and the two colleagues in the back seat started cracking up. I have no idea what I said to illicit some innuendo about horse shoes, but it sure made their evening....

...they did not tell me and I don't think I want to know.

skip916
Jan. 17, 2010, 10:42 PM
so i got a new horse in December and my facebook profile pic is of HER on the day I got her and she had white polos on. My super sweet non-horsey friend is always really curious about horses and so she writes on my wall:
"jazz looks super cute with his white leggings on!"
I wrote back thanks and that jazz is a mare (girl) and she said:
"oh, i thought all the girl horses get shipped to kentucky to have babies!" i asked her, giggling, where she heard that and she said, "oh i always watch that show, jockeys!" lol...
.................................................. ................

i feed in the mornings at a friends barn and the property is adjacent to a rental house, a new couple moved in a few weeks ago and one morning I was in the barn when the girl comes running in and says, "I just wanted to let you know that last night one of the horses was very sick and laying down for a long time, so I called my sister who used to ride horses and she said that that is totally not normal and horses die if they lay down!" I said, "which horse was it?" to make sure that no one was actually colicky or anything which i doubted but just being careful and she said "the one in that green sweater, AND my sister said it was cruel to let a horse outside in one of those too and they are only for when they are inside", i really didnt know how to respond at this point and said "he seems fine but thanks for letting me know and he likes his sweater because he has short hair and gets cold easily. (i wasnt about to try to explain that he was clipped) he also likes to lay down when he takes naps", to which she replied, "well if he dies dont say i didnt tell you!" i said- "ok! thanks"

a few days later she asked if we could please pick up all the horse poop that was out in the field (10 acres) because her dog kept eating it.... sure, i'll get right on that!

ctab
Jan. 18, 2010, 09:45 AM
I have gotten the "bar" thing too.
My 5 year old son is not so keen on doing the "bouncy bouncy" on the pony (posting trot) but want to take the 11h pony over the 3 foot oxer. He still asks if she will get bigger and where is her mommy?
My mom still thinks it cruel to keep their heads down while they are ridden. (As in on the bit)
I get the "You still need lessons? You TEACH riding why do you still need lessons?" I get the look like I must be the worlds worst teacher.
My husband said to me after the CC round "Why are you so tired? Doesn't the horse do all the work?"

Sightunseen
Jan. 24, 2010, 07:54 AM
Funny enough the most stupid things I get are from actual horse people for the most part. Though I do listen to country music and I do line dance, and one night I was at the bar and was talking to this guy who grew up riding western and I said yeah I ride, at which point he looks me in the eye and says "well obviously you must ride western". I wasnt sure what to say to that I think I was like"...um actually no". I have a western friend who refers to my barn as "the sissy foofoo lala barn" becasue we have showers and cobble stone barn isles. But I still get repremanded periodically for calling my horse "my pony" by horse people who look at me and say "he's not a pony"...yeah no kidding hes like 17.1. People at my barn also cannot seem to tall the differnece between my horse and my trainners horse...yes they are both big and grey, but one has a dark face and one has a HUGE stripe and they are built TOTALLY differently....you'd think these people would be able to tell the difference, my non horsey dad can tell the difference from accross the property....And my all time favorite: My horse has tetrich spots (big white spots, kinda makes him look like an appy), well I was telling on of the new girls about the random white spots my horse has at which point she looks and me and says "Oh, those are called dapples". I was actually speachless.

Flying Hippotamus
Jan. 24, 2010, 05:23 PM
Funny enough the most stupid things I get are from actual horse people for the most part. .

Yeah that's true. The same person at my barn who occassionaly subs turnout and turn-in keeps mixing my horse up with another. My horse has been there 4 years and she has been there longer. OK they are both chestnut TBs with white blazes but really that's it. They are completely different shades of chestnut - red vs orange. Big head vs more araby looking. One time she put them in the wrong stalls and fed them wrong. Another time she but my horse out in the wrong pasture with 5 other geldings! I mean holy crap do you know how dangerous that is? And would you believe it I had a show that day! Somehow the eventing gods were looking out for him and he was fine and actually really good at the show (just a combined test).

Sightunseen
Jan. 24, 2010, 05:33 PM
I just thought about the best thing Ive had happen:

The summer after my first year in college one of my guy friends was home from school and asking me how everything had been and what not. Well one of my first comments was "Well my baby is doing great" I was of course talking about my 5 yo TB mare, who I was under the impression he knew enough about to get, but he looked at me with this appaled look and said "You had a KID!!" It was deffinently a mistake on my part, but an amussing incident non the less

lizajane09
Jan. 24, 2010, 07:28 PM
I used to live in a more rural area and didn't get many funny looks if I went grocery shopping on the way home from the barn in my breeches... well, apparently they don't do that in the larger town I recently moved to. I did it once, and had been in the store for about 3 seconds when a man came over to me to strike up conversation, clearly using every "horse word" he had ever learned:

Man: Oh, you must have been riding! What kind of horse do you have?
Me: She's an ex-racehorse - a Thoroughbred.
Man: She? So it's a mare?
Me: Yes.
Man: Oh, I see! And has she ever foaled?
Me: No, she's never been bred.
Man: Oh, so she's never foaled. How interesting!

... I escaped as soon as humanly possible.

I also get the barn/bar one a lot. It took a while for the people in my class to figure out that when I said I went out to the barn before class that I wasn't, you know, drinking in the morning to make the first year of vet school less painful :lol:!