What did you do with your horse when you went to college? Kind of long - sorry!

[Land_of_talk]

Or, if you don't or didn't have a horse at that time, what WOULD you do?


I'm a senior in highschool, I've had my horse for not quite 4 years, but I've been riding for almost 12 - I'm sure everyone can understand me when I say that horseback riding has become apart of me. I have other interests and passions - but I've always identified as a horseback rider.

I'm going to school in Manhattan next year, I live a little less than 90 minutes outside the city, and my horses stable is about 2 hours from the city. My parents are trying to be as supportive as possible, but they're already paying for school, and are offering to pay for my horse while I'm in school provided the costs don't exceed the 500-600 dollars per month we spend now for lessons and board. I'm incredibly, incredibly greatful for that - but here's the issue:



My horse is really high-energy, he thrives in a solid, consistent work schedule - and while it won't kill him to be ridden less, I think he would be happier in a 5-6x a week schedule. Between working and going to college, and having to rely on public transportation - there is no way I'll be able to get out there more than once a week AT MOST.


I've been looking into stables in the surrounding boroughs of Manhattan, as well as NJ an CT - I've found a very, very nice stable in Bergen county - for 700 dollars, which is REALLY reasonable for the proximity and level of care they give, but outside the budget. Any suggestions or reccomendations for stables in the area would be really helpful! I'm willing to be flexible with leasing or allowing qualified stables to use him as an intermediate/advanced school horse for hunters/jumpers/eq and dressage.


I would go outside the budget if I could, but I'm going to be working nights at restaraunts(My friend's dad is a bartender and is showing me the ropes :cool:) and trying to come up with part of my rent every month, as well as groceries. I probably won't have any luxuries like cable to give up to save money - and I won't have the time to take on a second job.


My school doesn't have an equestrian team - or really any equestrian resources whatsoever.

My parents don't know much about horses - so it's not really like they could oversee his care without lots of help.


SO. With those issues in mind, I've come up with a few options - but I'd like to hear what you did with your horse or what you'd do in the above situation? Stable suggestions around that area(within 45 minutes) would be particularly helpful!

Thanks!

[poltroon]

Land of Talk, I've been there.

You're not going to like my answer, and I know that because I know I didn't like it. I cried and cried.

I tried to keep my horse, but in the middle of my freshman year it became apparent that financially it was a no-go, and I didn't have time to ride anyway.

Sell or lease the horse to a long term situation. It's what's best for him and it's what's best for you.

Your college years are unique in your life - a time when you will study for a career as well as have many opportunities to meet new people and try new things. The most valuable part of a good college isn't the classes, it's the students and professors you meet, the various special projects and internships you can try, etc. I spent a summer at an observatory doing research. You might have a chance to go abroad. Or even just getting to know your fellow students, eating at unfamiliar restaurants, learning about the work they're doing - it's all good.

Horses will always be part of you and part of your life. One of the reasons I cried was because I had convinced myself I might never have a horse again. Exactly the opposite was true: spending the time concentrating on school gave me enormous opportunities that allowed me more access to riding and showing and horses than I ever had as a junior.

Take the $500 a month, and put it in your "after-college horse account". You'll be surprised at how much it will grow, and it will give you the confidence to know that it is only a temporary hiatus. You'll come back to riding even better than you were when you left. Promise.

[bf1]

Ditto Paltroon to sell or lease. You will not have the time! Take these years and grow! Take a semester abroad, try other sports, date! In the summer, perhaps you can work at a barn, do some catch riding, lease a horse.

It is not the end of the world. It is a difficult decision - but it sounds as though your horse would not be happy waiting around for 4 years. And with a job, your time will be even more limited. You could perhaps take a lesson on the weekend at that new barn - but 40 minutes is a long commute.

Until you have been away at school you have no idea of the adjustment you will experience. Good luck!

[dghunter]

I'm a junior now and have kept my horses. I make it up between 4-6 days a week. I've had no problems getting involved in other things. I have a serious boyfriend, we plan on getting married after college. It's also a long distance relationship so we only see each other every few weekends. I spent my first year and a half living in the residence halls, first year with a roommate. I joined a sorority and am currently Director of Rituals and am running for another office. I have a not quite perfect GPA but still am able to graduate with highest honors :yes: I take between 15-18 credits a semester. I am also in numerous honors societies. I also have a part time job. And with all of that I still manage to ride about 4 or 5 days a week. Horses are an hour away from where I am. I could never sell either of them and it works for me.

However, you have to evaluate your own situation. I made it work for me but for you it may not. I also make sure I have one or two super busy days class wise but make the other days very light so I have all that time to go to the barn and still do other things. I honestly don't feel like I miss out on anything. I still have plenty of time to go out and do things that typical college students do. The one thing I will say is that I HATE going out to bars or parties. I hate crowds and lots of noise. So it's not like you'll ever find me out on friday or saturday nights. I've also always been an early sleeper, even on weekends I'm in bed by midnight. But that's who I am, not who I am because I decided to keep the horses :winkgrin: I do have people at the barn who are willing to lunge him for me when I cannot make it out (other guy is retired so he doesn't get worked). I'm really happy that I kept them and honestly I've never come across a time where I said "I wish I could do that but I have the horses to take care of."

[hj0519]

I kept my horse (well...didn't have one freshmen year, now have one sophomore year) and without him here with me this year I would be as miserable as I was last year. It really depends on you and your priorities. And your time management skills! So far this year I haven't had any trouble with not having time for my horse...I ride him six days a week, I've done a couple of shows on him, plus I'm on my school's riding team and practice twice a week with them, do three team workouts, and go to all the team shows. I ride a lot and I'm busy, but my schoolwork isn't suffering (I think I'm doing better than I was fall semester last year, actually) and still have somewhat of a social life - or what I consider a social life, I'm not a partier so I don't crazy on the weekends like a lot of people at my school. But then again, my horse is a lot closer than yours would be - mine is ten minutes away from me and I have a car, so it's easy to get there. Transportation and distance will definitely make it hard for you, but not impossible.

[NCSue]

It's a tough situation. My oldest daughter went to a college that had an equine program so she was able to take her horse with her. If she wasn't I'm not sure she would have gone. Have you considered looking into a different college? It's not too late for submitting applications although you are getting close to the dead line.

You might check with the local feed store and equine vet. There may be a person who has their own barn and is willing to board one other horse for a lower rate. Otherwise leasing or selling is probably the best option. I know you know that you have to consider your horse's welfare. You also need to consider your parents. You mentioned that they were not horse people and had limited knowledge.

[SmallHerd]

I understand where you are concerned. First of all, how can you go through college without your horse? And secondly, your horse need regular work or he will lose his mind.

My daughter is a sophomore in college and went through the same thing. She has had her horse for 10 years and is TRULY part of her. Her horse is HIGH ENERGY and gets anxious if he is not working. The one difference is that I also have a horse and ride and we board at the same facility. Unfortuantely ehr horse is WAY too much horse for me and I do not have time to ride 2 of them.

Fortunately we were able to send her to school without having to sell the horse, but we were concerned about her horse's well being.

He DOES get regular turnout, 3 days a week on grass pasture. He also lives in a stall with a 1/2 acre paddock attached. We adjusted his feed and hay to accomodate weight maintenance and less work.

At first, he was a bit confused about not working and going a little stir crazy, but now understands that he will see me on a regular basis for hoof picking, quick grooming, treat dispensing and a good wither scratch. Once a month or so he sees his girl and gets ridden. He has adjusted, although it took a while.

Can you keep him where he is and ask someone to look in on him a couple of times a week? He will eventually understand that he is not working full-time anymore and will adjust to his new way of life.

Good luck!

[Renn/aissance]

I limited my college search to those schools which either had a riding program or were in an area where I could keep my horse, so I have still been able to ride full time during college while taking an average of 17 credit hours and working part-time. I feel for you- I have imagined being in your situation and I didn't much like the thought.

Are you able to find someone at your barn who would part-lease him from you? Or someone at the other barn you mentioned, the $700/month one, who would part-lease him so that you could offset the cost of board, still have time for your studies, and still keep him in work?

[Milocalwinnings]

I"ll go against the people who say sell/lease him becaues you won't have time.

I'm a freshman in college. I thought I was going to have to sell my gelding when I went to college, but for some reason my parents decided they'd pay for him (but my board is nowhere near $500/month). I pay for his board when I'm home for the summer and for now they'll pay his board during the school year.

With 20 credit hours this semester (21 next semester), I don't have time for a job. My horse is standing around in a pasture 15 hours away from where I go to school. So really, it would make sense to sell him.

But to be honest, even if I just see him during winter and summer break, he's still mine. I look forward to going home so that I can go see him.

I'd look for a barn that's cheaper, or just keep him where he's at. I wouldn't sell him unless you really had to.

[BuddyRoo]

I was really blessed. My family had a farm and my horse was relatively young and didn't have any major requirements...so while I was in school, she stayed back home. Cost me little....but I really didn't get to ride much at all.

I just rehomed my athletic mare to a home where she can be used because as of right now, to pay for her board means no riding. And no riding means a horse that's just getting older and not getting better.

I think that if I were in your shoes, I'd look for a lease situation. Even a half lease would offer some compensation and still allow you to ride.

The bottom line though ist hat if you want to have horses in your future, you need your education and a good job. So this is an investment.

If your horse is young and can afford a few years off without detriment, find a lower cost option and just let go of the competitive riding for awhile. Else, lease.

You can keep your horse if that's important...but in this market you have to understand that an out of shape, out of training horse no matter how lovely....well, they're harder to place and get money out of. So if your horse is in work now, carpe diem.

Else, get comfortable with the idea that riding needs to take a back burner for a bit.

[cloudyandcallie]

I went off to school in VA where Mary Baldwin had a riding program, but I left my horse at home. My father paid for his expenses and my mother took care of him, and I came home on all holidays to see him instead of going to NYC.

[WorthTheWait95]

I took my horses with me to school and competed on the circuit a lot my freshman and sophomore years while carrying 20 cred semesters. It was a lot. Too much, really. If I could do it over I would have leased out two of the three and just kept one with me to ride at school and only done a handful of shows.

I'm extremely lucky in that my dad had no problem paying for my horses (and still does) so money wasn't an issue but TIME was. I didn't have any negative effects from it (managed to maintain a 4.0) but my life is SO much easier now that I'm a senior and just have the one horse with me. I have time to ride, study, hang out with friends and do college activities like football games and stuff like that. I've limited my showing to just my favorite summer circuits and everything is just so much more manageable. My retired boy and young horse are both at home and I just have my one 'main' horse here with me. He goes back and forth from school to home with me on breaks (I have a truck and trailer).

I would strongly consider selling your horse if money is an issue, though. I'm so lucky in that horses are my stress relief and I'm not sure I would have done so well in my college classes without at least one here with me but maybe you could find a lesson program or something in your area so you could stay involved.

[msj]

The first go at college I went to a 2 yr branch of the University of Pittsburgh in my hometown (Johnstown UPAJ)because I would NOT give up my horse.

Then I dropped out of UPAJ after 5 trimesters and played with horses for ~ 5 yrs. I do end up going back to school in NY for 2 yrs for vet assisting and ended up working lab animal research (better pay than vets). For the 2 yrs in NY I sent my horse to the Potomac Horse Center in Giathersburg, MD when it was being run by Betty Howett, a wonderful British instructor with her FBHS. Best riding school and training center in the USA at the time. I knew the horse would be used only in lessons and ridden well but that was 39 yrs ago. Also, I went back after graduating and got my horse and shipped him up to where I was working in NY.

[trubandloki]

Could you possibly find a lease situation for him at the barn he is at now.
This will give you some time to determine exactly how things are going to be for you as far as time and energy and money. If you find out after this semester or year or whatever it is just not going to work then you can sell him or the opposite if you think you will have time.

I think it is too complicated of a time in your life to make such a big decision about something you have had for so long.

If he stays where he is you will know how the care is, etc. You will feel better about not having to go see him which will take away some stress.

Have you talked to your trainer?

[mep0726]

I am currently a junior in college and I have had my horse for all three years so far. I showed quite a bit for the past two years, but I have recently been picking up more hours at work (30+) so my showing has been somewhat limited lately. However, I found that my horse was my stress-reliever. It was my 2 hours to go ride him, brush him, and enjoy not having to worry about anything else.

I am also an honors student carrying a very high GPA, am involved in several honor societies, and do quite a bit of shadowing and volunteer work. However, like a previous poster, I am not a partier and am normally in bed pretty early most nights. I have come to find that time management is the key.

[Casey09]

I didn't have my own horse in college, but I did lease. I was very, very lucky that my parents were able to help me out financially as much as they did. I was a full-time student with no job, and I really found that time was not that much of an issue in college. However, you would have a much longer commute to your horse!
I think that it really depends on so many factors. I know some college students right now who, due to financial issues, would love to be able to sell their horses into long-term homes, but just can't get them sold. I would advise you to look at all options.
I think a lot depends on how you want to spend your college years. Selling or leasing into a long-term situation would give be the least stressful and it never hurts to spend a few years exploring other options. It would also probably make the most sense financially. However, a half-lease might be feasible because you probably would have time to see him once or twice a week. However, life is a trade-off and it might mean giving up something else.
I also rode in grad school, and I found that a bit more difficult, esp. time-wise. I found a schedule that worked for me - basically, I went to some of the "meet and greet" weekend evening stuff, but I left fairly early and went home and to bed! Then I was up early Saturday and Sunday mornings riding, home by around 10:00 am, and then studying for most of the rest of the day. I also rode one weeknight per week. It worked for me, but I'll admit that I did probably miss some other opportunities.

[Laguna 007]

I am a junior in college now. All thorough college my horse has been at the barn i board at at home- 6 hours away from school. My freshman year I managed to make it home every other weekend to ride, but the gas money started getting ridiculous. Now I just go home as often as I can, a couple times per semester, plus Thanksgiving, winter, spring, and of course summer break. I have to say that I am absoulutely miserable in college, and not having my horse around has a lot to do with that. The area I am in for school does not have many A hunter/jumper barns around, mostly just backyard/western type barns, so I was unable to find a place that I was comfortable keeping my horse. We do have an equestrian team here, but it is very disorganized and we dont have practice or anything, so the only time i ride with school is when we are at a show.

I dont have any specific suggestions for you, but do have to say NOT to sell your horse if you have the choice. It can be harder than you may think to go from riding regularly and being in training to pretty much stopping cold turkey. I have to say that knowing my horse is home waiting for me, and counting down the days until I get to see him and ride again is the only way I am making it through school right now. Riding is my one true joy and the best stress reliever I can find- and I personally need that stress reliever while in school.

[FlashGordon]

As a teen, I had a little QH gelding that was the love of my life. That horse kept me out of trouble throughout my high school years, and taught me more life lessons than I can count. My parents bought him for me when I was 12, but I paid his way as best a teenager could. When I hit senior year, my parents started making plans to sell or rehome him.

I got nearly a full ride to a private college that had a well regarded pre-vet program, and also an equine studies program. My parents nixed it. Didn't want me playing with horses!

My parents forced me to re-home my horse. I ended up at a school my dad wanted me to go to. School was awful, but I pulled straight As. College life was not my thing, not a partier, not into the frat scene, or the social cliques prevalent at this school. I was lost without riding and my horse, and I ended up transferring to a school in my hometown. I was in the process of trying to get my horse back when he colicked and had to be put down.

Now almost 30, I work in advertising-- the practical career my parents wanted-- and loathe it, but it pays the bills. I work part time at a vet clinic, still have a horse. My mom tells me every day I should have been a vet. Duh, mom.

My dad finally admitted to me a few years ago that he deeply regretted making me give up my horse. He keeps telling me to go back to school and get a vet tech degree, because animals are what I love. A little late now, dad.....

Moral of the story.... now is the time to get a handle on your own life, and your own dreams. Whether that means taking the horse to school or not, well it is YOUR choice. Very kind of your parents to offer to help you foot the bills. But at this point, it is your decision.... so do what you think is going to be best for you, and the horse, regardless of outside pressures.

Follow your gut, so you don't look back 10 years later wishing you'd done something different...

[Rikerkv6]

I took mine to school with me. However they were never more than 1/2 hr away from me. Freshman and sophmore years my parents helped out and I full-boarded. My junior and senior years I did self care-board and a co-op. It worked well for me, I generally saw my horse daily and rode plenty, I almost sold her my junior year due to $$ issues but lucky for me no one bought her :) she is irreplaceable to me so I'm glad I stuck it out. I took many 21 credit semesters, rode on the college team, worked a PT job and had plenty of social life. But I am really good at organizing my time and like being busy. It just depends on what you are happiest doing- but it can be done!

[AKB]

Why are you planning to go to school in New York City? If you have your heart set on NYC, I would sell or lease out the horse.

My daughters picked their schools based on academics, but all of the potential schools had to be places where they could make horse ownership work. If you are selecting a school that won't work for horse ownership, you need to accept that it won't work and find a good home for your horse.

[Laguna 007]

Flash, your post was very encouraging to me, as I am going through something similar with school at the moment and am trying to work up the courage to make the changes I need to to make ME happy. Luckily my parents are realizing that what I am doing is not for me, so I have their support, but it is kind of difficult to completely change my mind and make the less "typical" decisions with only 1 year of college left. Its nice to hear someone say to follow your gut, follow your dreams, and not to give into outside presures (although I suppose I should already know that...).
Thanks.

[pday09]

I knew going into the application process that anywhere I went needed to have a barn and some situation for me and my eventer. That left me with still a LOT of options, from Ivy league, to seven sisters, to more moderate goals. But not many big cities. So if you have your heart set on New York, I think you need to lease or sell the horse out. Who knows, you may come out of college less interested in horses than you were when you went in anyway. And if you do, THAT IS TOTALLY OK. And if you don't, then if you've leased the horse you can still have your horse.

As for me, I am a first year at Mount Holyoke college, the oldest of the 7 sisters. IMHO, it is THE BEST school in the nation for girls that are serious scholars and riders. The classes keep me more than busy enough, but I never find it hard to get to the barn since it's a three minute walk from my dorm. My horse is flourishing from the 2x/week lessons that count as a gym credit, and I'm finding the college transition very easy since I have my "rock," my horse, here. I'm also part of our dressage team, which has taken the IDA championships many times, as well as our champion equitation team. We also have a western team. There is a lot going on but I feel that riding here is PART of the college experience for a lot of women, not just something that takes up our free time.

[Event4Life]

You'll be amazed how quickly 4 years goes by. I tried having a horse at college for the my first year and a half. I went to a small, rural college in the middle of nowhere PA. I was lucky as well in getting support from my parents & having a car. I'm really glad I had my horse my first year. I didn't find first year too academically challenging, and my horse was a great stress reliever and connection to home/familiarity because I was the only person from my high school ever to attend my college. That year I found plenty of time to ride, play rugby, and study/go to class, and socialise. In second year, things got really difficult. Academics took a massive jump and I couldn't really keep up with it all. Luckily I had 2 friends who rode, and they took a lot of the pressure off because they would ride her a few times a week. My BO (a fellow cother) was also AMAZING. Eventually, I gave her away mainly because I went abroad, but also because I knew even when I did go back to school in the States there was no way I'd handle third year if I couldn't handle second.

I've actually transferred to the University I "studied abroad" at. Now finally in my 3rd year here, there's no way I'd have time to have my own horse. It would be far too logistically complicated too - Edinburgh is a city and as I don't have a car, transport would be a problem. I've found other activities to take away the stress though. If you decide not to take your horse, or part lease him and only ride 1x a week, you'll find other activities too. That's part of the fun of University - trying new things and meeting new people. Don't get so bogged down in the horse world that you miss out on that.