Polo update post #69. He sleeps.

[LMH]

My old man Polo is struggling a little.

He is 24, IR and Cushing's

He has had a persistent sinus drainage for a month. Been on Uniprim for almost as long.

We REALLY thought it was a bad tooth but today's dental exam revealed nothing irregular. A few pre-molars are saying farewell to this world-but nothing to explain the drainage and 'sewage' smell coming from his mouth.

Vet is coming back to get some digital xrays to see if it is just a DEEP sinus infection or perhaps a growth or tumor:(

I know these kinds of infections are common with Cushing's horses.

Maybe two years ago I had a thread with photos showing very odd growths on his tongue and roof of his mouth. He has more odd growths now in other parts of his mouth.

This leaves me a little troubled that he may have a sinus growth-which would not be good at his age.

So, I will know more today or tomorrow when he gets the digital machine.

IF it is a deep sinus infection he will be drilling a hole in the front of his head to insert a tube to flush it for a couple of days. :eek:

While a little freaky, it would be a 'cure.'

IF it is a growth, we are in a bigger jam. I understand that would no be so treatable.

Does anyone have any experience with something like this in an older horse, particularly one with Cushing's?

I guess this is my month to buy the wing on the local vet clinic. :-/

[mroades]

I had a persistent sinus infection in a horse a few years ago. We ended up doing a culture and sensitivity on it, and it was resistant to sulfa drugs. We did Baytril paste for a month and it cleared up.

[LMH]

Well this should be interesting.

Vet took the rads and there is SOMETHING odd in there but hard to say what.

He is forwarding the films to UGA for consult.

It is not a liquid like fluid. It is not a solid mass-it looks more like dense cobwebs.

It goes across 3 teeth and up and around-not round or oval-kind of spider web looking.

:confused:

[JB]

Dense cobweb looking makes me very suspicious of a gutteral pouch infection :(

I HOPE it is not that :no:

[LMH]

Dense cobweb looking makes me very suspicious of a gutteral pouch infection :(

I HOPE it is not that :no:

Can you tell me more or link me somewhere?

I am not familiar with any of these kinds of problems.

Edited to add: I searched and his spider web is much further forward-over the premolars 3 and 4 (if I recall-partially 2 I think, then 3 and 4)

[monstrpony]

My guy had a very periodic white discharge from the right nostril, maybe three times over a month. He also seemed to be a little NQR, just a bit lethargic. His sinus xrays also looked cob-webby, suspected possible infection and did a couple of weeks of doxycycline, which seemed to take care of it. He had no smell, though. One suspicious tooth root to keep an eye on long-term, but no evidence of tooth abscess. Scope found some discharge forward of the sinus, but gutteral pouches were clear.

I'm guessing you probably have something a little more complicated, what with the off smell. But the cob-webby stuff was explained to me as possibly being fluid in the sinus that was producing the drainage.

Or else his sinuses are decorating for Halloween! ;)

Hope it resolves soon, and well, for the old fellow.

[LMH]

Thanks monstr...I was reading that doxy is often a good choice for sinus issues.

Hoping his Halloween rads are just that!

[FlashGordon]

No suggestions LMH, but sending jingles your way. ;)

[eventgroupie2]

Gosh - since Willie and I are "new" to Cushings- have no words of wisdom :no: But have plenty of hopes and jingles that it turns out to be something easily treatable for your guy!

[LMH]

*sigh*

OK...he definitely has a 'space occupying mass' which can be an abscess, cyst or tumor.

They can do a procedure at the local clinic-basically cut a small flap in his face and see what is inside.

Then I will know if it is something that can just come out or something worse.



It is a standing procedure and he would be home in 2-3 days.

If it is an abscess or cyst it would come out and has a slim chance of return-of course a tumor is a different game.

SO, can anyone share experiences on this?

[FatPalomino]

Ugh. That's a hard decision.

If it were my old horse, I'd be conservative. I'd hope for an abscess and treat with tough drugs, and see if that helps, before doing surgery.

[eventgroupie2]

The only experience I have really had with cushings so far is that the disease is one reason that Willie fails to heal quickly, or properly (ie blowing out sutures constantly). Don't know if that would be a factor with your guy, since the incision probably would not be as massive as Willie's has turned out to be after the 3 surgeries..... but might be something to think about?
Jingles for you and your boy with this hard decision.

[twofatponies]

Jingles for your guy! As a fellow horse owner waiting to find out if my mare has a brain tumor... I can sympathize.

I tend to agree with FatPalomino, though. If my mare were 24, not 14, I would probably have a much more conservative approach to how far to go with diagnosis and treatment.

[DiscoMom]

No advice, just more jingles!

[LMH]

I am so so SO torn.

The procedure is not overly dangerous-BUT he is old.

He has cushing's.

I wonder what the stress will do to his cortisol levels?

He will have about a 2x3 piece of his bone cut open like a flap and surgically put back.

He is tired.

BUT he eats and drinks.

BUT he is IR and takes careful management.

But he is my Polo of 15 years deserves a cahnce

BUT he he is Polo of 15 years that deserves to live out stress free.

I hate this.

[LMH]

Ugh. That's a hard decision.

If it were my old horse, I'd be conservative. I'd hope for an abscess and treat with tough drugs, and see if that helps, before doing surgery.

He has been on over 3 weeks of meds-Uniprim (not necessarily tough) without any resolution.

I could do a smaller procedure at the farm-tapping a hole and running something down it to identify as an abscess or tumor.

The cost of the smaller procedure is about $300, the bigger one is $800-1200.

What would suck is starting small then having to do big anyway.

What also sucks is the stress of the big one vs the small.

I found some rads online of Maxillary cysts and the looks like his rads-but there is no way of knowing without looking.

I wish there was a way to just culture him or flush something out of his nose to know.

[staceyk]

Back when my 23 year old was only 10, he had the "under general" full-fledged surgery to remove a HUGE mass in his sinus -- it actually pressed against a piece of cartilage between the sinuses and occluded all of his right nostril and some of his left. It was just a big cyst, nothing more sinister than that.

It was over ten years ago but the surgery was really no big deal, other than it's surgery under a general. After surgery he wasn't a pretty face, but healing was very fast, it never recurred. It would be hard on an oldster but not long term recovery. I was riding my horse pretty soon afterward.

If my now-23 year old TB needed the same surgery my concerns would be cost (can I afford it) and the likelihood of him not making it through the surgery for other health reasons. RIght now he's pretty healthy and enjoying life, so I'd try to make it happen. If he had health issues, it would be a different set of questions.

WIshing you the best of luck -- PM me for details if you want.

[LMH]

Well i had another long talk with my vet.

Whatever the growth is has a thick wall-so know flushing or antibiotics will clear it.

Surgery IS the only option.

He will likely be scheduled in the next week or two (at the first opening).

I will keep everyone posted...

[McVillesMom]

I have seen something similar with a 30-31 year old TB at our barn. I suspect he also has Cushing's, or pre-Cushing's, but has not been diagnosed.

When I moved there 2 years ago, he was having very similar symptoms - foul smell and nasty discharge from one nostril. He ended up being taken to Ohio State, where he had not only skull radiographs but also a CT and a biopsy of what appeared to be a mass in the maxillary sinus. The pathology report came back as inconclusive, so his owner decided just to "wait and see".

A year and a half went by; horse was still eating and drinking well, had periods of nasty discharge, for which he was given rounds of antibiotics, and a constant foul smell. Dentist came this past summer and found a questionable tooth (I believe it was a premolar; don't quote me on that though) and it was extracted. The tooth was very irregular and malformed - it looked like a rock, that's the best way I can describe it. Since the tooth was removed, the drainage and odor have completely gone away. I assume the "mass" may have been reactive tissue from a tooth root infection. I'm also guessing that there was new bone formed on and around the tooth AFTER the rads and CT were done, or they would have found the problem much sooner.

The horse is doing great now; obviously feels much better and has a real sparkle in his eye that wasn't there before. Best of all, I don't mind him rubbing his head on me anymore...:lol:

Don't lose hope! It may not be as bad as you fear. I know it seems like a lot to put any horse through, let alone an older one with other issues, but most of them do remarkably well. Good luck to you both. Please let us know when the surgery will be so we can be thinking of you :)

[LMH]

Thank you for sharing that McVillesMom.

I am actually doing ok with it for now. Tomorrow, of course is another day.

My vet was so amazing and going through every detail with me-every option and the result of every option.


I would love more than anything to wait and see but this mass is already pressing on his septum so it really needs to go.

It is also pressing on his first molar root so it will be interesting to see what is IN there when they get in there.

Of course, until he goes, I am still open to thoughts and ideas and feedback. I have been getting information for several forums and the different stories and feedback are...overwhelming.

So many different results.

[EqTrainer]

Goodness! You need a break, girl. At least in the meantime, have a cocktail. Life is just relentless sometimes :(

[LMH]

Tomorrow at 3pm is Logan's last dose of meds.

My vet has instructed me to immediately have a beverage and not worry for the weekend.

No weekend worrying allowed.

I can then turn to Polo on Monday.

This growth has been there awhile-so it is not like anything drastic should happen in a week (thank GOODNESS).

So, i will do as instructed.

Have I mentioned how tired I am?

[JB]

Weekend Worrying does no one any good, and does you a lot of harm.

I heartily fourth the suggestion of a good drink. I sooo wish we were closer - I'd make you one of my Dad's, and now my, famous margeritas :)

Ride, relax, sleep this weekend. That is the best you can do {{hugs}}

[DMK]

LMH, I've been on a non-stop roller coaster since July between my hand and my horses, and was almost grateful when Monday's bill (think "large surgery") was for the ... car. Your vet is right, pull up a chair, pour a drink and embrace the disasters as they roll over you. Eventually this will get better, because quite frankly, it's hard to imagine it getting worse.

[LarissaL]

Wow, it does sound like a really tough time for you. So sorry to hear!

My friend's horse had experience with a similar procedure. He had constant discharge actually from his ear.. WEIRD. Turned out he had an abnormal growth that they said was a tooth in his sinus that caused what would normally be nasal discharge to come out a channel in his ear. He had the flap surgery standing in the aisleway and has recovered without incident or recurrance. Will keep my fingers crossed for a similar outcome for you and Polo!

[LMH]

DMK I will save you a seat next to me.

I have actually found a couple of interesting sites that show photos of the flap surgery.

Of course they are more interesting on "not my horse" as opposed to MY horse :eek: but nevertheless interesting.

And thank you Larissa! Good to hear another good outcome story!

[JB]

Wow, it does sound like a really tough time for you. So sorry to hear!

My friend's horse had experience with a similar procedure. He had constant discharge actually from his ear.. WEIRD. Turned out he had an abnormal growth that they said was a tooth in his sinus that caused what would normally be nasal discharge to come out a channel in his ear. He had the flap surgery standing in the aisleway and has recovered without incident or recurrance. Will keep my fingers crossed for a similar outcome for you and Polo!
I have a friend with a mare who had a tooth in her ear!

[DressageGeek "Ribbon Ho"]

Big hugs to you, and jingling for all.

[Lulu]

Sending good thoughts your way for a peaceful weekend, and easy surgery next week!

[LMH]

I am not adhering to the orders to relax.

I have been reading up on ethmoid hematomas.
:eek:

Of course we don't know what it is-but if it IS that-oh my heavens. This one is pretty darn big on film...

The return rate of that thing is 20-50%!!!

I am just so uneasy with doing this to my 24yo horse.

I am just so uncomfortable with this entire situation.

Why can't I just leave him be until he can't be anymore?

I feel awful doing that as well.:sadsmile:

I keep trying to find out how to identify these things without opening him-but I can't find a way.

Everything I read though leans towards something very ugly.

[McVillesMom]

Try to relax. I know it's hard.

You can't just leave him be because you want the best for him, and you want to have him "be" for as long as possible. You want him to have a good quality of life, and you want to get rid of this "thing" if you can.

Is there any chance that they could go in endoscopically and take a biopsy of whatever it is? Obviously if it's something like a hematoma, they couldn't cut into it...but at least then you might have some idea how much of a problem it might be.

[Rodeio]

How did this turn out?

[Old Mac Donald]

Bumping up. Leah, how did Polo go?

Mel, who is freaking out about ethmoid hematomas... Oh god, please no :(

[LMH]

I have an update. Today we took rads of Polo again.

It has been 6 months since his first films.

Big Bertha has grown 1.5x what it was in the fall.

She measures about 16cm long by 9-10cm deep.

I am actually very torn on what to do.

This thing WILL keep growing and it will become an issue that requires him to be put down...

He eats and drinks and is in good weight-so the vets feel he is not suffering.

But I am worried otherwise. He has this THING in his head. His sinuses drain all the time.

Now the odd part-his front teeth are 'melting away'-the vet actually wondered if he is a cribber-he is not.

So is this THING in his head putting out something that is eroding his teeth??:eek:

From the growth rate, the best guess is he could have even 6-12 months.

But damn sam-he smells, has drainage, his teeth are eroding, Cushing's, IR....

I guess i am just wondering if a lovely spring day, too soon, is better than something else.:(

[monstrpony]

Not at all an unreasonable thing to wonder, alas.

When I had to let Monstr go (two years ago, today, in fact), I consoled myself that it was before the heat, before the bugs, and with his last day spend in a glorious spring pasture, before weeds. And no grazing muzzle that day.

Whatever you decide, we're here for you. You could do a lot worse than that lovely spring day ...

[LMH]

When I had to let Monstr go (two years ago, today, in fact), I consoled myself that it was before the heat, before the bugs, and with his last day spend in a glorious spring pasture, before weeds. And no grazing muzzle that day.



This is exactly where I am thinking. He is also a non-sweater so summer in Georgia is second to hell.

Not to mention on any given day he could founder again.

Thanks for sharing your thoughts and kind support.

[JB]

Oh Leah, that is just so sucky :( My vet says "better a day early than a minute too late".

I have no advice, but I can tell you if you decided to do this tomorrow, it would not be a Bad Thing :sadsmile:

[matryoshka]

Sorry Leah. We had a horse years ago with a tumor in his sinuses, and we waited until he had trouble breathing to put him down. He was in a near-panic (the culprit was a chilly, rainy night and he must have had some swelling). I do not recommend going that way!

I had my kids' pony put down in November, planned it between birthdays and Thanksgiving so nobody would attach the event to a date. She had squamous cell carcinoma that had gotten much worse during the year, and I knew it was going to be a hard winter. I did not want to wait until she was skin and bones to put her down (as a 12hh pony, she needed more feed than my OTTB to maintain her weight).

I medicated her more than usual for pain and made sure she had sweet feed for a few weeks before the date. She was IR and had foundered years before, so she had not had sweet feed for years. I planned her last weeks carefully. She loved the sweet feed!

The guy who came to put her down thanked me for not waiting until she was skinny. He said he sees horses in all sorts of horrible states and he's always grateful when somebody chooses not to wait that long. He humanely put her down at home and hauled her off, then called to make sure I was okay (because of the meds, there was more blood than usual).

The day after I had her put down, rain started that lasted three days. Then we had a lot of snow. When the wind was blowing and the blizzards hit, I was thankful for the timing in putting her down. Some people thought it was unethical for me to consider my child's feelings, and others thought it was too soon. You're the one who knows the horse and yourself, and only you can make the choice.

I'm sorry you and your horse are going through this. Try to put your own feelings aside and figure out what it best for the horse: the question is quality of life vs. quantity. Nobody else can figure out where the balance lies.

[LMH]

thank you everyone.

I have made arrangements for next week.

It is still amazing spring weather. He is not yet suffering from not sweating, no founder from spring grass.

matry-reading what you shared about a sinus tumor simply confirms for me this is the best choice for Polo.

Today I noticed his breathing is already getting a little bit rougher-sounding more like a mild darth vader.

His respiration is also up-though it could be the heat-I doubt that is the total issue.

There is a risk the tumor could burst a blodd vessel and no way to predict if or when.

Knowing the growth rate and risk involved, I really do feel this is the kindest thing I can do.

[EqTrainer]

What to say? I wish Polo an easy trip over the bridge and for you, my friend... Peace.

[monstrpony]

{{{{{Hugs}}}}} Yes, a good decision. A hard one, but a good one. You and Polo will be in our thoughts.

[RedMare01]

(((Hugs)))

Caitlin

[ReeseTheBeast]

Hugs, support and a salute... for doing the right thing. I'm so sorry.

[ChocoMare]

This it be very right. :sadsmile:

[matryoshka]

There really is no true comfort to offer, other than that I think you are doing the right thing. Make your horse's last few days as pleasurable for him as you can. Keep those good memories and try to let go of the bad memories.

[Grataan]

This it be very right. :sadsmile:
Yes. I agree with the DVM who said better a day too soon than a minute too late.

I've done this with one of mine, an ex-show horse. He always got so sad when we left him behind after he retired, and he so enjoyed the show prep. So, we set the date, and the night before put him out in the lovely front pasture, then brought him in and clipped and bathed him. That morning, put on his show sheet and gave him a short trailer ride out to the spot in the pasture. He was thrilled to get the attention but also seemed to know-and he just sighed and relaxed. Buried him in his show clothes.

[DressageGeek "Ribbon Ho"]

Leah - so, so sorry. Big hugs to you.

[ReSomething]

Yes. I agree with the DVM who said better a day too soon than a minute too late.

I've done this with one of mine, an ex-show horse. He always got so sad when we left him behind after he retired, and he so enjoyed the show prep. So, we set the date, and the night before put him out in the lovely front pasture, then brought him in and clipped and bathed him. That morning, put on his show sheet and gave him a short trailer ride out to the spot in the pasture. He was thrilled to get the attention but also seemed to know-and he just sighed and relaxed. Buried him in his show clothes.

Well that just got me to crying.

In the back of my mind is what I might need to do for the old guy. Sweet feed and peppermints and lush green grass and getting all pampered for a day is in the plan.
What plan I can make.
All my sympathy for you and Polo, and my heartfelt best wishes.

[JB]

Yes, grataan, that got my bawling a bit as well *sniff*

Thinking good thoughts for you today Leah...

[FatPalomino]

:( Hugs to you, Leah. You know it's the right thing, although it is never ever easy.

[LMH]

Polo scared the HELL out of me today.

At 7am he was fine. By 8:30 he was in a total damp sweat with a very elevated respiration rate.

He had the 1000 yard stare.

I gave him an "emergency body clip" even though it was not actually hot and some banamine.

As of this afternoon, his HR is in the 40s and respiration is about 30-32.

Now he has the 700 yard stare.

I have the dozer man and vet on speed dial and am REALLY hoping he holds on until the first of the week.

I am just not ready for now.

[MunchkinsMom]

Hugs to you, you are doing the right thing for Polo, even though it is heart-wrenchingly hard to do.

And none of us is ever ready for this.

[Nlevie]

Good luck to you - you are doing to right thing for Polo ! I have been there and it is such a relief to know they went peacefully with no pain and urgency.

[HorsesinHaiti]

(((((((HHHUUUGGGSSS)))))))

[LMH]

OK so we are in the middle of a tornado watch and Polo decided to feel gassy AGAIN.:(

At 6 pm he came in. He did not touch his hay-first time in FIFTEEN years.

At about 8:30-9 pm I checked him-still no hay or water-one manure pile. Hyper gut sounds.

I gave him 11 ml banamine orally (per vet instructions)-I was too freaked to give a shot as milo was screaming in the background.

I am checking him soon-I hope-if the weather allows.

I hate to call a vet for this question-as it is simple. It is Saturday night at NOT good weather.

How soon can I give more if he needs it? And full dose or less?

If he is worse I, of course, will call-but if he just needs a boost, can anyone offer the dose or protocol.

[EqTrainer]

Banamine is normally given every 10 to 12 hours.

If you feel he is scared or nervous and that is contributing to his current state, you may want to consider giving him Ace. Of course you should call your vet and ask about options. I can tell you that when we've had to bump up a planned euthanasia my vets instructions have always been to do what we had to do to keep them comfortable.

My heart is with you at this craptastic time:cry:

[LMH]

THANK YOU! That helps. I am off to check him again.

Fingers crossed.

[Old Mac Donald]

Fingers, toes, paws... all crossed for you and Polo

[Grataan]

Banamine I give every 12 hours or so. But realistically, if you are just trying to keep him comfortable until Monday or whenever the weather breaks, I would have no problem giving it sooner (say 8 hours) I'd throw in some gastrogard too if I had that. Liver, kidneys, stomach, that's where the problems would start.

I feel like my post was so...cold but it's honest. The growth is only growing, we don't know what it is, the horse is very old, the euth is planned, etc.

Do you have any sedatives, other than acepromazine?

[LMH]

good morning all.

Polo is 'fine' this morning. I am drained.

He never did eat much hay or drank any water to speak of.

3 piles in 12 hours.

He is outside now and IS eating some alfalfa hay (what the hell-he eats it).

[monstrpony]

Argh. Hope you both have calm weather in the next little while. In fact, calm everything ... Thinking of you--

[EqTrainer]

Leah it sounds like he is slwing down... The vet is coming tomorrow, right?

It won't be bad, he's got on or two hooves over the bridge already. Hang in there.

[LMH]

I was thinking that same thing...his body is just slowing a bit. Just tired.

I had this scheduled for Thursday but am moving it up.

The trouble at this point is for things to dry enough to get the machinery in.

Both vet and dozer are available Tuesday first thing.

I hate being selfish at a time like this but I have this special spot picked up on a BIG hill with a tree-so peaceful.

If we have to do this tomorrow, I don't think they can do it there.

I know I know-stupid thinking on my part.

I am watching him today and if he slows down more I will move things up to tomorrow.

This is a stupid question-but do horses do that-sort of slow down on food and water?

[onthebit]

This is a stupid question-but do horses do that-sort of slow down on food and water?

Yes. Unfortunately the only down side to my job that I love so much (retirement farm) is that I have had more experience than I would wish watching a horse come to the end and I think what you are experiencing with Polo is very normal.

He may very well have a really strong comeback in the next day or so to make you start second guessing your decision. Don't, you are doing the right thing. I am so sorry for you, you have had Polo for several years and he could not have asked for a better home.

[HoneyB]

Leah- I am so sorry to hear about Polo. Call if you want to chat. You will be in my thoughts.


He may very well have a really strong comeback in the next day or so to make you start second guessing your decision. Don't, you are doing the right thing. I am so sorry for you, you have had Polo for several years and he could not have asked for a better home.

I've seen this twice - once with a dog and when my Grandmother passed. Sorry. Be strong.

[LMH]

your timing is perfect onthebit.

I have just been sitting on my deck watching Polo and the others-and he looks just fine today.

He is eating gras, respiration is good-looks just fine and healthy.

BUT Bertha is still growing in his head. I keep thinking about that and how a really painful tragedy could be on the doorstep.

I have heard so many stories of owners scheduling 'the day' and the horse comes out all spry and happy.

I keep trying to think about that too.

I made my decision based on the fact this tumor is IN there and growing.


The mild gassiness or colic being better isn't changing Bertha.:no:

[TBMaggie]

I've been following your and Polo's story, and it's making me so sad. I think that anyone who has had a beloved horse for a number of years can relate to what you are going through - I know I sure can!

I was 'forced' to move up my horse's euth. day too...and it practically killed ME to have to make that call a second time. On the day that my horse was put down, he acted completely normal - if I only looked at him kind of 'squinty eyed' I would've sworn that he was his old, healthy self....but who was I kidding?? It was time. Pain, even in 'minutes', feels like an eternity to a horse.....

I'm hoping that the weather allows you and Polo a peaceful end....but if you have to make that call for tomorrow, well, you'll do what's right. (And he could still have that spot under that tree - might have to have a little help 'after the fact' getting there, but you know what I mean:sadsmile:)

A huge hug for you - this stuff is never easy.

[Androcles]

LMH, so sorry you are going through this. You are being a real trooper, and Polo appreciates it. Don't begrudge yourself being a little 'selfish'. I hope all goes well in the next days for you.

[LMH]

A Tribute

I will always remember
When our eyes first met
I thought to myself
This Is As Good As It Gets

The feel of your nose
Against my left cheek
The smell of your breath
Would touch me for weeks

I walked you around
And surveyed your shape
I stroked your soft coat
And studied your weight

The decision was easy
It must have been fate
How did I know
I had found my soul mate

Each day I would watch you
In your pasture with all
You would run and leap sideways
And rarely would fall

Our first ride, our first jump
And our first full show course
Only proved once again
You were better than most

The years slipped on by
And we became a great team
You became my best friend
You fulfilled all my dreams

You stood by my side
When I needed a laugh
On the days when I cried
You were always steadfast

The winters would come
And break gently to spring
As you gracefully aged
Another year you would bring

One day it was clear
Our time was near end
You gazed into me
And I held my best friend

My last feel of your nose
Against my left cheek
The last scent of your breath
Would haunt me for weeks

I will always remember
With my eyes stinging hot
I thought to myself
You Were As Good As It Got



~For my Polo. You gave me your heart each and every day. Now I share with you a piece of mine to keep you warm until we ride together again one day.



Crowning Touch 198?-April 26, 2010

[Sansena]

*hug*

[TBMaggie]

Oh my that was beautiful. RIP Polo. I'm crying with you...:sadsmile::sadsmile::sadsmile:

[Long Spot]

God speed, Polo. How lucky you both were to have had each other. You did right by this horse up until the very end.

Hugs to you, LMH.

[monstrpony]

Well done, Leah. It hurts like hell, I know, but it couldn't be done any better.

Rest in Peace, Polo. You are missed.

[marta]

i'm sorry for your loss.
you did the right thing.

(((hugs)))

[jaimebaker]

I'm so terribly sorry:cry:

[Zu Zu]

Thoughts and prayers and HUGE HUGS for all who loved & were loved by Polo. RIP POLO ~ you will always be a "treasure" for so many.:cry:

[JB]

:sadsmile::sadsmile::sadsmile:

[jetsmom]

I'm so sorry LMH. Godspeed Polo.

[katarine]

Fine job. You did the best thing.

[SuperSTB]

So Sorry LMH :cry:

Rest in Peace Polo

[MunchkinsMom]

What a beautiful poem and tribute to Polo, I'm crying with you. You did the kindest thing for him.

[Androcles]

Goodbye Polo.

:sadsmile:

[Wraper2]

((((HUGS)))) for you.

How can I bear to lose you, my precious gentle one,
to know that you will not be here when my day is done.
So much of my heart, my love, have I given up to you,
how then can I stand the pain now that your life is through.
My sorrow overwhelms me, the tears so freely flow,
how can I carry on my life, with a heart that's laden so.
Then the answer comes to me from the stillness in my soul,
remembering the love we shared will help to make me whole.
I'll hold you in a special place, so deep within my heart,
and in these loving memories, we'll never be apart.
You will not be so far away, your presence I will feel.
I'll wrap myself in memory and slowly I will heal.
The years we shared, the little joys, the laughter and the
tears,
my love for you will never die, but strengthen with the
years.
So fare you well, my precious love, I gently let you go,
and pray for all the Gods' there be that you will always
know,
I loved you so, my little one, that love will never cease,
I gave you warmth, I gave you love, and now I give you
peace.

<Author unknown to me>

[onthebit]

You did the right thing, however I am so sorry. Your poem was beautiful. :sadsmile:

[Buffyblue]

I'm so sorry for the loss of your special friend. Godspeed, Polo!

[RomeosGirl]

LMH -I'm so sorry for your ache, you did the best for him

Polo - may you run in green fields, forever pain free

[matryoshka]

Sleep well knowing you did the right thing. Polo was lucky to have you.

[Auventera Two]

OMG Leah. I couldn't believe it when I saw this thread. I am so so sorry about Polo. This is horrible, I'm at work and crying like a baby. I have followed your trials and victories with Polo and this just breaks my heart.

You did the right thing. Don't ever doubt that. You gave him the best, and did all you can do and then you saw him to a peaceful end. That is honorable and right.

Take care of yourself and know that this tribulation will pass.

[LMH]

Thank you all for the kind words.

I thought I was prepared for this-but to be honest, I was not even close to being prepared for the grief.

I know it will get better...but my heart is so heavy.

[AppJumpr08]

((Hugs))

[JB]

There IS no way to prepare for the grief. It is what it is. Polo may not have been a very active part of your life lately, but you knew he was there, felt him there, all the time. That does leave a hole, physically and mentally. I'm sure this morning at feeding time it was terrible for you. Don't try to pretend it's ok, just know it's something you WILL get through in your own time. One day you'll think of him without tearing up and think "wow, how about that" :yes:

*says she who is tearing up again at your loss :(*

[Grataan]

Godspeed Polo.

You did the right thing.

[Lucassb]

Thank you all for the kind words.

I thought I was prepared for this-but to be honest, I was not even close to being prepared for the grief.

I know it will get better...but my heart is so heavy.

Aw, Leah. What is that quote, about true love being the willingness to free our beloved horses from their pain by making it our own?

Polo was lucky to have you, and you were lucky to have him. There are few greater joys than that sort of partnership. May the memories of all the good times you shared together be a comfort and a joy to you always.

[lisa]

Leah, my thoughts are with you at this very difficult time.

He was your true partner... you both took care of each other...

{{{hugs}}}

[FalseImpression]

I am so sorry. I don't think you can ever be prepared. You know it will happen, but "prepared", no, never... it would not be right any other way. You need to grieve, mourn, go through all the stages and then, you will remember the good times. I have not lost a horse, but I have lost dogs and no matter how it happens, it is part of your life that goes away, leaves a hole that will never be filled.
I loved your tribute to him, even though I had big tears rolling down my cheeks by the end!

Have a good sleep Polo, rest up to run through those green fields in the sky!!

[pintopiaffe]

:(

I'm sorry. Words can't help, because they touch the part of us beyond words.

You did the best by him.

Godspeed Polo. :cry:

[craz4crtrs]

Thank you all for the kind words.

I thought I was prepared for this-but to be honest, I was not even close to being prepared for the grief.

I know it will get better...but my heart is so heavy.

I am so sorry for your loss. I had to put my Cushings horse down last Sept, he went blind and neurologic. He was the horse of my life, I miss him terribly. Gator was 25.

I am so glad I have my fjordiex, he has been a keeper for years, but Gator was just ... there and now he's not.

We lost my daughter's horse to Cushings in Jan of 06, he had a tumor somewhere up behind his palate, and grew massive under his tongue, he went blind, horrible. He was 28.

Cushings is a horrible disease, but when it turns malignant, devastating.


Hugs. :cry:

[HuntJumpSC]

Godspeed, Polo :sadsmile:

[RidingAllDay]

I'm sorry LMH, soon you will remember only the good things and that is how it is meant to be.

I understand he was an incredible horse and he lived a great life.

Hugs.

[citydog]

That was beautiful, LMH. :sadsmile:

I'm so sorry for your loss. Godspeed, Polo.

[Lori B]

LMH, you are a great horse mom. He had a wonderful life with you. Your poem was beautiful. Thanks for sharing it with us.

Hugs.

[matryoshka]

It is always hard afterward. Daily routine seems to bring out the grief, when the familiar face is no longer there. It'll get easier when the flies are swarming, everybody is sweating, and you realize Polo no longer has to cope with such things. The nice-weather days will be the hardest for a while.

You did the right thing at the right time. Keep repeating this to yourself.

[msj]

Leah, I'm so sorry. :cry: I know how much he meant to you. You have my most sincere condolences.

RIP Polo. You were much loved.

[LarkspurCO]

I'm sorry to hear about the loss of your friend Polo. It sounds like you will miss him for a long time.

[Androcles]

LMH, my thoughts are with you.

[jenm]

Sending you many hugs during this difficult time. All horses should be so lucky as Polo and all horse owners should be so blessed as you were.

[elsbet]

((((LMH)))), you will stay in my thoughts during your time of loss. Polo was much loved by you - that was so obvious - and he lived a good long life with you. Cry now, and know that the laughter and smiles will come. It will take time.

Godspeed, Polo.......

[Petstorejunkie]

Celebrate Polo who has passed, he is now free of his body that was broken. That is a very precious gift to give.
(((((HUGS))))) Leah

[hitchinmygetalong]

Wonderful tribute to your dear friend. I'm so sorry for your loss.

[eventgroupie2]

Hugs from VA - you were very brave. Doing the right thing is not always easy. May better days be ahead, when you can think of your wonderful times together with a smile instead of tears.

[LMH]

Thank you again everyone.

Today I visited his grave. The couple that works at my farm made it perfect with lovely flowers and color.

He sleeps under a HUGE tree-one branch flows out and he is just under it.

It is SO peaceful. It brought me comfort.

[msj]

Leah, that sounds just heavenly. If this is not a pasture you use for the horses to graze, perhaps a wooden bench up there might be a nice addition so you could take a book up and read or just rest and remember what all he gave to you. :sadsmile:

When I lost Chocolate I wrote a bit of a eulogy and many stories of remembrance that ended up about 5 pages. I'm sure you could probably write a book about your experiences with Polo. :)

[LMH]

I had the SAME idea msj-i do not turn out there. I ride there often.

So a bench is a wonderful idea.