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View Full Version : Spoiled vs. Lucky horse kids how do you define the difference.



4Martini
May. 3, 2009, 07:33 PM
DH and I always have this argument - he thinks all horse show kids are spoiled. Having boarded at a show barn with some extremely nice, polite, helpful show kids, I disagree. I think those kids are just lucky being born into weathly families.

Now, I know there are spoiled horse kids - ones that throw out non-primary colored ribbons on the way out of the ring and treat their parents like crap, kick their horses in the gut after a bad ride etc...

But, how do you define the difference- I need some ideas to better get my point across.

billiebob
May. 3, 2009, 07:34 PM
Easy--spoiled kids make me want to tear my hair out, lucky kids do not.

Peggy
May. 3, 2009, 07:44 PM
Lucky:

Will ride one horse back to the barn at a show to get the second one rather than making the groom walk one 15 minutes back and then the next one out.

Will help out by holding a your horse while you run to the bathroom. Or running to the show office to do an add/scratch. Or running back to the barn to get something.

Either walks their horse out after riding or nicely asks the groom.

Always thanks the trainer after a lesson.

Is the kid that you want to take along when a group is going out to spectate at a show, or make a tack store run, or grab something to eat.

justathought
May. 3, 2009, 07:51 PM
Lucky

Simple its the kid you want in every barn all the time - the kid that is the first to congratulate a competitor and the last to complain - the kid who always takes the blame for a bad round and always gives the credit to their horse for a good one - the one that is the first to help and the last to leave - its the kid who waits to melt down on those bad days until they are in the provacy of their hotel or house...

Its not hard to spot but it is hard to come by

Mukluk
May. 3, 2009, 08:00 PM
The lucky ones realize that they are lucky and truly appreciate what they have. They are not the least bitt afraid of hard work. They understand that they are a large part of the equation in riding success and do not tend to blame the horse, trainer, etc when the don't do well When they do well, they are quick to attribute their success to horse, trainer, yet they also recognize that their own hard work played a role. They are focused on being a better rider and horseman/woman versus winning all the time.

dghunter
May. 3, 2009, 08:02 PM
Lucky is the one who lucked out to be able to afford the nicer horse but works hard at the barn. Cleans tack, cleans stalls, grooms her horse, just enjoys hanging out at the barn. Is always willing to lend a helping hand by sweeping the aisle or throwing hay when she knows the BO is having a rough day. At shows she's the one who can be found supporting everyone else when she isn't showing and polishing boots at the in-gate. All-in-all just a good person to have around.

Spoiled is the one who loses one class and immediately wants to sell the horse and get a new one. Spoiled is the one who has the groom tack the horse up and then hands the horse back to said groom when her class is done and immediately is on her cell phone. Spoiled blames the horse for not winning when the horse clearly saves her each time because she thinks she's perfect and doesn't need to learn anything. Spoiled looks at you in that disgusted way if you even ask her to hold another horse. Spoiled is the one that (if you don't already have kids) makes you never want to have kids. Spoiled is the one that drives you to drink if you have to be around her for a week long horse show, haha jk :lol:

angrychinchillas
May. 3, 2009, 08:27 PM
The spoiled ones don't treat "the help" (grooms, braiders, etc.) like people - just scenery. They don't make eye contact, don't try to remember names, or even talk to them beyond "I need X Horse at 10:30."

Lucky ones do.

This test, oddly enough, works on adults, too. You can tell a lot about a person by how they treat service workers - grooms, waiters, house cleaners, whatever.

horsegirl123
May. 3, 2009, 08:36 PM
Any child that has the opportunity to be around horses are lucky in my book. You don't necessarily have to be wealthy but yes you need to have some means for this hobby. Spoiled is having everything handed to you without working for it. Having your trainer do all the work so you can win.

Ones that throw out non-primary colored ribbons on the way out of the ring and treat their parents like crap, kick their horses in the gut after a bad ride are considered bad sportsman period.

The ones you see at the barn early in the morning to feed, walk, muck, water, groom etc... are the lucky ones. More than likely those are the same ones congratulating their competitors and always have a smile on their face. They put their best foot forward and have a true love for the sport. Those are the lucky ones.

My daughter has been showing for years and would not trade one moment of it. The experience has shaped her into the responsible teenager she is today with compassion and great sportsmanship.

dghunter
May. 3, 2009, 08:41 PM
The spoiled ones don't treat "the help" (grooms, braiders, etc.) like people - just scenery. They don't make eye contact, don't try to remember names, or even talk to them beyond "I need X Horse at 10:30."

Lucky ones do.

This test, oddly enough, works on adults, too. You can tell a lot about a person by how they treat service workers - grooms, waiters, house cleaners, whatever.

Someone told me once that you can always judge a guy based on how they treat the waiter. Works well with horse people and grooms I'm guessing!

nlk
May. 3, 2009, 08:58 PM
Along with what everyone else has said....

Spoiled and lucky children are made by their parents (sorry folks it's true)

Lucky children are taught from the beginning that this is a privilege not a right, if a any point in time they are rude to parents, horse, trainer, or other exhibitors then their horse is going for sale!:lol: (I bet if you ask those kids why they are so polite they will give you an answer that is similar when interpreted)

Spoiled children are the ones who think the are entitled to their horse. When they get a 2nd place behind their biggest competitor and the parent always says they put in a better ride, had a better pony etc. No matter how the ride went. They could have picked up the wrong lead right in front of the judge and still get told they are better and should have placed first.

That is the biggest problem IMO as a former lucky kid, a trainer and a parent! (trust me I knew better then to act like a snot! I wanted to keep my horse:D)

TheOrangeOne
May. 3, 2009, 09:02 PM
I'm surprised that throwing out ribbons is in the same league at all as kicking your horse because you're pissed off or treating "the help" like crap. Honestly, I don't keep ribbons unless the class held a special significance. How I rode and how my horse went is more important to me at the end of the day than the ribbon in and of itself.

justathought
May. 3, 2009, 09:07 PM
I'm surprised that throwing out ribbons is in the same league at all as kicking your horse because you're pissed off or treating "the help" like crap. Honestly, I don't keep ribbons unless the class held a special significance. How I rode and how my horse went is more important to me at the end of the day than the ribbon in and of itself.

You're right how the horse goes and how you rode is more important than a ribbon..... but for all those who work hard and never get a ribbon, those ribbons do look important and picking them up and taking them with you (even if you later throw them out) shows respect for the process -

Just my opinion

Seven-up
May. 3, 2009, 09:08 PM
The ones you want to smack are the spoiled ones.


The ones you want to take home are the lucky ones.



I think if it's your own kids that DH might be worried about, you might point out that it's all in how you raise them. Don't do your homework? Not allowed to ride. Disrespect someone else? Don't get to ride. Throw a fit? You get ripped off that pony in front of everyone and sent home. Don't take care of your horse? That one deserves to be locked in the closet without meals, in my opinion. ;)

Sing Mia Song
May. 3, 2009, 09:08 PM
I'm surprised that throwing out ribbons is in the same league at all as kicking your horse because you're pissed off or treating "the help" like crap. Honestly, I don't keep ribbons unless the class held a special significance. How I rode and how my horse went is more important to me at the end of the day than the ribbon in and of itself.

There's a difference between turning ribbons back into the show office and dramatically stuffing them in the trash barrel or throwing them down in the dirt. ;^)

mep0726
May. 3, 2009, 09:09 PM
There's a difference between turning ribbons back into the show office and dramatically stuffing them in the trash barrel or throwing them down in the dirt. ;^)

Agreed. I think that was what the OP meant.

CenterStage123
May. 3, 2009, 09:25 PM
I acctually think the lucky ones are the girls that don't have anything handed to them. My parents pay for board and thats it. Its up to me to pay for lessons and shows. I help at the barn every day after school, and you can bet I'm never rude to the grooms because I'm one of them! And you know what? I wouldn't want ut anyother way. Sometimes I wish I could buy a ready to go junior huntrr, but then I realize there wouldn't really be any point in riding. I enjoy my $300 rescue, he has taught me more than I think any horse ever can. Next year we'll be debuting in the juniors. And if I put in a good round, it'll be all on him:D I consider myself "lucky" because even though I'm not quitr there yet, I know eventually I'll be a great horsewomen.:D

Now that I typed that all out I realize that it doesn't really answer your question, but this does:

Spoiled- complains when thier trainer asks them to ride a greenie or not quite that fancy horse

Lucky- will gladly. Accept the chance to ride any horse, even if its just walking the 26 year old lesson horse around the ring for 20 minutes. And you can bet they will groom it and give it lots of love.

DancingQueen
May. 3, 2009, 09:36 PM
The spoiled ones have somebody on the sidelines with a water bottle even when it's 66 degrees and raining just in case they need it.

The lucky ones get a drink out of the cooler at the ingate while they are waiting to hack even tohugh their daddy owns Poland Spring!

4Martini
May. 3, 2009, 09:39 PM
There's a difference between turning ribbons back into the show office and dramatically stuffing them in the trash barrel or throwing them down in the dirt. ;^)

Thanks- that's what I meant. Throwing them out right in front of the other kids that may have been hoping for any ribbon. I have no problem with people not keeping ribbons if they don't want them - but dramatically tossing them in front of a crowd as part of a hissy fit is not exactly classy IMO.

WorthTheWait95
May. 3, 2009, 09:39 PM
The spoiled ones have somebody on the sidelines with a water bottle even when it's 66 degrees and raining just in case they need it.



I don't know about this one. I consider myself to be one of the 'lucky' ones. My dad was a huge supporter and loved to watch me show often scheduling his business trips around the biggest classes of the year so he could come and watch. I don't think having someone on the sidelines supporting you makes you spoiled.

Now if my dad had PAID someone to specifically stand there with a water bottle just in case or if I had thrown a fit when he couldn't attend that would for sure be spoiled but that wasn't the case. :lol:

eventmom
May. 3, 2009, 09:44 PM
Freedom (and stuff:)) without responsibilty, spoils.
Responsibility without freedom frustrates and damages.
Proper amounts of both makes kids soar;)

eventmom
May. 3, 2009, 09:47 PM
Freedom (and stuff:)) without responsibilty, spoils.
Responsibility without freedom frustrates and damages.
Proper amounts of both makes kids soar;)
Oops, and I forgot to add that to a great extent, the more you give of one, the more you can and should give of the other.

hideyourheart03
May. 3, 2009, 10:52 PM
I think that the definitions of "lucky" should be refined a little bit.

The kids I know that are "lucky" are great sportsman, great competitors, and great horsepeople, but they don't have to tack up their own horses or do their own stalls. Not saying that they treat the help like crap, but really, if you're "lucky", you're not doing that.

They ARE the kids that ride their horse back to the barn istead of making their groom walk up (that is if the horses don't go really close together). They ARE the ones who will be willing to hold your horse while you go to the restroom. They ARE the ones who are happy to grab you a drink or snack when you're stuck at the ring and they're running to the food place. They ARE the ones who say "Please" and "Thank you" to the help. They ARE the ones working hard cleaning tack and polishing boots to make sure every detail is perfect. They ARE the ones who show up on a Monday afternoon to hand walk/graze their horses (provided they're not in school).

Spoiled doesn't do any of this stuff.

Just because you don't clean stalls and groom all your own horses doesn't mean you're spoiled. It's everything else that makes you spoiled.

dghunter
May. 3, 2009, 11:16 PM
I think that the definitions of "lucky" should be refined a little bit.

The kids I know that are "lucky" are great sportsman, great competitors, and great horsepeople, but they don't have to tack up their own horses or do their own stalls. Not saying that they treat the help like crap, but really, if you're "lucky", you're not doing that.

They ARE the kids that ride their horse back to the barn istead of making their groom walk up (that is if the horses don't go really close together). They ARE the ones who will be willing to hold your horse while you go to the restroom. They ARE the ones who are happy to grab you a drink or snack when you're stuck at the ring and they're running to the food place. They ARE the ones who say "Please" and "Thank you" to the help. They ARE the ones working hard cleaning tack and polishing boots to make sure every detail is perfect. They ARE the ones who show up on a Monday afternoon to hand walk/graze their horses (provided they're not in school).

Spoiled doesn't do any of this stuff.

Just because you don't clean stalls and groom all your own horses doesn't mean you're spoiled. It's everything else that makes you spoiled.

I think that what you're saying is true. The lucky kid is the one who has a nice horse and can afford to qualify for the Big Eq (in some cases, not saying there aren't lucky kids at other levels too) and they probably don't clean stalls and such. However, the lucky ones aren't the ones who turn their noses at the thought of having to clean a stall. The spoiled ones go "you want me to do what? Are you crazy?"

MissKatie
May. 4, 2009, 12:42 AM
I think they are all lucky!

Unfortunatly, some of them are also spoiled. The one's who don't appreciate what they have are spoiled.

Parker_Rider
May. 4, 2009, 01:12 AM
Most of what I was going to add has been said... But I'll throw in two more distinctions...

*gratitude (to everyone: parents, trainers, grooms, the horses...)
*to quote GM, there are 100 disappointing days for every happy moment; you have to have a passion for the sport because those who are just out for the ego or the trophies or the prize money will not be very happy in this sport... the lucky ones work through those 100 disappointing days, the spoiled ones change horses, blame everyone else and never quite get to the truly splendid moments.

I am definitely a spoiled, spoiled child - 3 horses, a house of my own and a car and a truck... but I hope to God that I'm regarded as a "lucky" spoiled kid, not a bratty spoiled kid. I only fear because it just occurred to me that for the first time in my life I ride at a barn with absolutely zero, none, nill bratty spoiled kids/adults and I'm hoping that it's not me!!! :) (I don't think I am, because if I were, my parents would have pulled the plug a while ago.. but still.. that paranoia lurks...)

indygirl2560
May. 4, 2009, 01:29 AM
I think the spoiled kids are ones that expect everything to be handed to them instead of working for it like everyone else. The spoiled ones expect the grooms, their parents, and whoever else is around to do things for them when they tell them to and don't go out of their way to help others. However, they are several spoiled kids at my barn who expect things and are quite spoiled, but are still generally nice people; they've just never been taught how to be truly appreciative and greatful by their parents.

While I think everyone is lucky to be around horses, I think the non-spoiled lucky people appreciate that while the spoiled ones don't necessarily. I'm very lucky. I get to ride nice horses with nice people at a very nice show barn, but I am in no way spoiled compared to a lot of my barn peers. I pay for everything(car, gas, insurance, lessons, shows, etc) while most of the girls I ride with expect their parents to pay for everything and get what they want, when they want or they'll throw a fit. Nothing makes me angrier when someone comes out of the ring with a ribbon,(even if it's last place), and beats their horse up for their bad ride, or even just blames their trainer, horse, or parents for what went wrong; I think many spoiled children do that.

eventchic33
May. 4, 2009, 08:37 AM
The lucky ones know that every ribbon is a primary color. That every placing has something to teach them.

chukkerchild
May. 4, 2009, 09:18 AM
I am totally spoiled AND very lucky-- my parents are into horses so I've always been immersed in them and had a lot of support. However, I try as hard as I can not to act like a brat. And I think that one of the brattiest and most depressing attitudes is that one where it's everyone's fault but your own-- your horse was acting up, the judge "just doesn't like my horse", the course designer was crazy, someone opened an umbrella during your round, that girl cut you off... sometimes these things are true, but people will have so much more respect for you if you just say, "Eh, it just wasn't a great round... better next time."

Moocow
May. 4, 2009, 10:06 AM
Spoiled:
The world revolves around me. I can do no wrong. Everyone/everything is my scapegoat. Work? What's work? Take my pony and get out of my sight! MOMMY I NEED MONEY FOR SOMETHING. NOW. BUT IT'S PPRREEETTTYYYY!!! MMMOOOOOMMM!!!!

Lucky:
I have a lot but you could mistake me for a working student because I work my butt off, too! I appreciate every bit of it and know how hard it is to make money and to support a child in a sport like this, so I help whenever I can and try to show my appreciation.

sandstar
May. 4, 2009, 10:57 AM
ATTITUDE .

magnolia73
May. 4, 2009, 11:24 AM
The spoiled ones don't seem to actually like horses.

I love the girls at my barn- one is happy to hack my horse, helps a ton, another will just pick up a brush and start grooming. They like the horses.

In contrast, I rode at a barn where the kids like the social life and could have cared less about the horses, beyond riding and showing.

katie16
May. 4, 2009, 11:29 AM
I'm surprised that throwing out ribbons is in the same league at all as kicking your horse because you're pissed off or treating "the help" like crap. Honestly, I don't keep ribbons unless the class held a special significance. How I rode and how my horse went is more important to me at the end of the day than the ribbon in and of itself.

I'm not the one who posted the comment about throwing non-primary color ribbons - However, I think the OP was not refering to "in the long run" as you who doesn't keep the ribbons unless the class was significant to you, but rather a kid coming out of the ring and immediately (and probably demonstratively) tossing the ribbon on the ground, in the trash, whatever. I could be wrong, but that was my take on the comment.

smay
May. 4, 2009, 11:42 AM
Just the idea of throwing the ribbon in the trash in front of other kids who didn't win a ribbon almost makes me cry because my kid has been the one on the other side a few times. She worked SO hard to make her backyard pony into a winning hunter, and at those first few shows where she didn't win ANY placings, it was hard. There were lots of tears! To this day she still treasures every ribbon he wins of any color! My favorite moment of ALL TIME was last year at a big show where previously she hadn't won a single ribbon...her first class they announced the placings and she was called for sixth... she SHOT out of the stands and practially skipped into the ring to collect that green rosette like it was the most beautiful ribbon in the world. And it was! These days she routinely collects the blue and still treasures them. Oh yah, she can be lazy and inconsiderate of her groom (me) and spends hours on her cell phone, but so long as she appreciates her pony and pats him on the neck, win or lose, after every class....

Trevelyan96
May. 4, 2009, 11:59 AM
Its not how much support and advantage you have that makes you spoiled or lucky, its how you value and appreciate it.

Lucky is quick to give credit and say thank you to their horse, trainer, groom, and parents for a good round, and will take a bad one with a sense of humor and a "I'll try harder next time" attitude. They're grateful and thrilled when they win, and congratulatory and admiring of the winners when they lose.

Spoiled is quick to give blame to the horse, trainer, parents, judges, and groom for a bad round, throws a hissy fit, throws the horse to the groom or parent, stomps off to sulk then bad-mouths their trainer, the winner's trainer, and the winner.

And I confess, DD would often act like a spoiled brat, but only towards me. If she got pissy with her horse or trainer, I snatched her little butt off her horse and put someone else on it!

GGsuperpony
May. 4, 2009, 01:10 PM
A new angle to convince the husband:

Saying "all kids who horse show are spoiled" sounds like the kind of very minor chip-on-the-shoulder my DH used to have. If yours is like mine, it may originate with the way said DH was raised, his parents attitudes' towards what they perceive as "fancy, rich people", etc. Pointing that little chip out - saying something like how different and more expensive does not equal snobby/spoiled, "I know you don't see it yet but really and truly, these are nice, regular people who happen to have money" - might do the trick. Worked for me.

Then be sure to acknowledge that, yes, there are plenty of spoiled kids out there so he's not totally wrong. Just point out that it's just not quite as black-and-white as perhaps he suspected.

(And I promise, if I have offended you, I really did not mean to! I don't know your husband and he may not think this way at all. You asked for suggestions and in a similar situation this one worked for me! :yes:)

4Martini
May. 4, 2009, 01:22 PM
Actually DH's sister was a slightly spoiled show kid and her friends were spoiled from stories I've heard. I only rode school horses growing up, but bought my own after I was on my own. I just don't think it's fair for him to paint all kids with one brush b/c of what he saw. I've met a lot of really nice show kids. It's just an on going discussion we have. So, I'm enjoying reading your feedback!

Tini Sea Soldier
May. 4, 2009, 01:29 PM
Just watch a bad round to tell the difference:

Spoiled kid cries.

Lucky kid laughs.

littleum
May. 4, 2009, 01:37 PM
I'm surprised that throwing out ribbons is in the same league at all as kicking your horse because you're pissed off or treating "the help" like crap. Honestly, I don't keep ribbons unless the class held a special significance. How I rode and how my horse went is more important to me at the end of the day than the ribbon in and of itself.

Same. I don't put mine in the trash- I discreetly put mine in the "reuse" box. I don't keep anything but tricolors at this point, unless the class was very special.

Not to sound uppity, but I have hundreds of "special" ribbons already. I've been showing 20 years! They're all in boxes since I have nowhere to display them in the new house. Anymore would really just go in another box. I still feel bad about returning the ribbons, but I feel just as bad stuffing them in boxes. :\

As for the original question, obviously, the kids who can't be bothered to do anything for themselves, or think they're entitled somehow.

I was one of the kids who had to do it all for herself or it didn't get done. Now I have a trainer and I could show up ring side, get my horse, go in, do the class, hand the horse back, walk away. At the last show we misjudged class time and I got my pony myself, warmed up myself and got myself into the ring. A spoilt kid (or adult, for that matter) would have had a tantrum.

I'd like add another class of kid though... I'm usually at the show barns at dawn (old habits die hard) and while I see kids there, they're not doing much. The adults are- but they don't demand the kids pitch in. But if another adult calls to them and says "Hey, can you hold this horse a second" or "Hey, can you carry this bucket?" the kids jump to work. Then go back to their IPod or DS. But the parents never ask for their help? It's not even like I hear the parents ask for help and get the "IN A MINUTE" whine. The adults just plain don't expect them to lift a finger, and the kids don't offer- but they'll hop to whatever needs doing if asked.

Go Fish
May. 4, 2009, 01:43 PM
Kids don't necessarily have to be wealthy to act like spoiled brats. We have a couple of the little darlings in our barn whose parents work hard to provide these kids with a nice horse and pay for shows. The kids are difficult to be around. I have a big mouth so they steer clear of me...:D

TheOrangeOne
May. 4, 2009, 02:03 PM
Just watch a bad round to tell the difference:

Spoiled kid cries.

Lucky kid laughs.

There's another one- what if the kid has worked hard for months to be able to ride in the show and bombs her trip on something he/she knows way better than to do? You wouldn't be upset at yourself? I'd expect a lucky kid to take what opportunities she has more seriously than to laugh when she made a mistake.

Abbeyroad1791
May. 4, 2009, 02:07 PM
Just watch a bad round to tell the difference:

Spoiled kid cries.

Lucky kid laughs.

I'm with the orange one. (Haha that sounds funny, but I digress...) Caring doesn't mean you're spoiled necessarily. Having a bad round and throwing a tantrum and blaming everyone but yourself (horse, trainer, person standing at side of ring making faces etc etc) is spoiled. But being upset about a bad round doesn't really make a rider spoiled. It just means they put work in and didn't get the results they wanted.

To answer the question:

Spoiled = have no regard for the people/horses/money that have helped them get to where they are. When they do well, its of their only own making. When they do poorly, its everyone's fault but their own. Caring for their horses before/after they show is on list of priorities somewhere between cleaning their room and washing dishes, aka not happening.

Lucky = grateful to have dedicated parents/trainers/horses that have supported them. Recognize the expenses that go into this sport, and realize that very few kids have that opportunity. Also recognize that in this sport the horse = #1. Good, bad, and ugly, horse comes first always. And they're not annoying to be around. :D

CTRL ALT DELETE
May. 4, 2009, 02:56 PM
I agree with the majority that have posted here. Lucky kids are glad to help out everyone whenever they can, hack other horses, appreciate what they have, etc. etc. Spoiled ones brag about their fancy horse, b**ch and moan until their mom/dad/groom does it for them, and avoids doing dirty barn chores at all costs.
I also agree that spoiled kids are not always wealthy. I have seen many a spoiled brat coming from an average family, where the parents are working their behinds off to get the kid the pony she wants and the kid has nothing but negative things to say.

The spoiled ones from the average, hard working families are the ones that really get under my skin. Just recently I saw one of these kids standing outside of the ring while her DAD LONGED HER HORSE. Why? "Daddy does it better." Sometimes I feel bad for the parents who get taken advantage of by their spoiled kids...but at the same time I find it difficult to conjure up any sympathy because after all, the parents are the ones who raised them! (Then again, I'm only 20 so what do I know about bringing up kids?)

Seal Harbor
May. 4, 2009, 03:16 PM
There is a difference between spoiled and fortunate. Sometimes a person is fortunate to have been born into money or to have people around them who provide them with opportunities. I've seen spoiled poor kids. They feel they are entitled and that everything is someone else's responsibility.

So the lucky kids that we are talking about here are fortunate AND gracious about it. As opposed to the ungracious spoiled rotten ones.

I know an adult who is from money, who used the term spoiled about herself. She is the least spoiled human being I know. She was fortunate to have been born into a family with money but she is honest, helpful, grounded and grateful. That is not spoiled.

Parker_Rider
May. 4, 2009, 03:44 PM
Just watch a bad round to tell the difference:

Spoiled kid cries.

Lucky kid laughs.

Eek, hope you haven't watched any of my awful rounds (and there have been lots of them! :lol:)!!! Whenever I get frustrated, I cry. I can't stop it, can't help it... it just happens... the waterworks start going and I try to discuss my round like a rational person, with tears streaming down my face and my trainer looking at me like 'it wasn't that bad!' However, I'm usually always frustrated with myself, and I'll sit there petting my poor horse that has to deal with my bad rounds. I think that's the difference you're talking about... crying and yanking on the horse and storming off, blaming everyone else = spoiled. But crying can be the end note to "I worked my butt off, and I went in there and blew it. aaarrrrgggg."

CFiona
May. 4, 2009, 04:59 PM
Lucky - Having parents that "get it".

IMO, not all lucky kids are grateful, appreciative, hard-working. I'm met some lucky brats.

Spoiled - Having money thrown at you, regardless of need or want. Getting a new things (anything from a $10 bracelet or t-shirt to a new horse) "just because".

IMO, not all spoiled kids are brats. I've met some spoiled kids who wish their parents would "get it".

Eventer13
May. 4, 2009, 06:23 PM
The kids I know that are "lucky" are great sportsman, great competitors, and great horsepeople, but they don't have to tack up their own horses or do their own stalls. Not saying that they treat the help like crap, but really, if you're "lucky", you're not doing that.

Just because you don't clean stalls and groom all your own horses doesn't mean you're spoiled. It's everything else that makes you spoiled.

If you're lucky (as in you have enough money to pay someone to clean stalls and tack up for you) you should still know HOW to do it. That's part of being a horseman/woman.

I watched a show online about Zara Phillips (queen's granddaughter, to all you who don't follow eventing). She mucks out, grooms, and tacks up. And she has grooms and certainly enough money that she doesn't have to do it herself. But that's part of owning and riding horses.

So yes, if someone doesn't know how to clean a stall, groom, or tack up (because they've always had "the help" do it), or knows how to do it but is unwilling because its work or not much fun, I would put them in the spoiled category. Don't care how polite they are, that's part of owning a horse. And I'm not saying that they have to do it all the time, but they should have no problem getting their hands dirty when work needs to be done.

klmck63
May. 4, 2009, 07:12 PM
Eek, hope you haven't watched any of my awful rounds (and there have been lots of them! :lol:)!!! Whenever I get frustrated, I cry. I can't stop it, can't help it... it just happens... the waterworks start going and I try to discuss my round like a rational person, with tears streaming down my face and my trainer looking at me like 'it wasn't that bad!' However, I'm usually always frustrated with myself, and I'll sit there petting my poor horse that has to deal with my bad rounds. I think that's the difference you're talking about... crying and yanking on the horse and storming off, blaming everyone else = spoiled. But crying can be the end note to "I worked my butt off, and I went in there and blew it. aaarrrrgggg."


I'm the same way. I disagree with the crying = spoiled attitude.For me, crying quietly out of frustration or disappointment is just how I deal with horse shows! I cry when I win because I'm happy, I cry when I screw up because I'm angry at myself. Some of us are just emotional! ;)

hideyourheart03
May. 4, 2009, 07:44 PM
There's another one- what if the kid has worked hard for months to be able to ride in the show and bombs her trip on something he/she knows way better than to do? You wouldn't be upset at yourself? I'd expect a lucky kid to take what opportunities she has more seriously than to laugh when she made a mistake.

I totally agree. I can't tell you how many times I came out of the ring in tears because I'd worked so hard for a something to go wrong in the ring. Tears themselves don't make a kid spoiled. Tears and shouting temper tantrums make a kid spoiled.

justathought
May. 4, 2009, 08:05 PM
I totally agree. I can't tell you how many times I came out of the ring in tears because I'd worked so hard for a something to go wrong in the ring. Tears themselves don't make a kid spoiled. Tears and shouting temper tantrums make a kid spoiled.

Your are right, tears alone do not mean spoiled, but they do mean that you have lost your composure. And, while we all do once in a while, learning to control it - or at least hold off until you have privacy is an important lesson and part of good sportsmanship.

Equitate.
May. 4, 2009, 08:23 PM
The lucky ones are courteous to stewards, ring crew, and their grooms, and the spoiled ones generally aren't.
The lucky ones laugh off the not so graceful moments, the spoiled ones hand off the horse to someone else.
The lucky ones have someone to hold horse number 2, but can and are willing to do work themselves. The spoiled ones keep their relationships with their horses pretty minimal.