When Do You KNOW He/She Is The One?

[SmallHerd]

Okay, so I'm horse shopping. I know what I don't want based on previous experience, and I guess I am a bit gun shy. When does one KNOW you have found the right horse? There is no sure fire way to "without-a-doubt know", but what are some of your key factors other than the typical (age, current ability, potential, soundness, intelligence, etc.)? Are there any light bulb moments you had while shopping that sealed (or unsealed) the deal? If it is between 2 horses, what are the tie-breakers?

I have typically been an impulse buyer, but no more. I would look, try, like and buy. Didn't get me anywhere but flat broke and frustrated - LOL. So this time I am trying, re-trying, asking questions, and in general taking my time and being more patient. I'm doing as much homework as possible so your input is appreciated.

[Brockstables]

Ah, impulse buying. Been there!
I suggest seeing a prospect on more than one occasion before committing to a purchase. Try to make several visits, and ride the horse, as well as watching someone else ride the horse.
Sounds like a pain, but when I rehome a horse I want to be sure it is as compatible a match as possible. I don't mind a few visits and rides to be sure the horse is the one! You should know within a visit or two if there is no chemistry between you and the horse.
Happy shopping!

[GotSpots]

You don't, necessarily. Because I'm just as susceptible to the pretty face or winning trot though, I have a system for looking at horses.

I start by making a list of what are my "must haves", what are my "it'd be nice to haves", my "absolutely nots", and what are my "I'd really prefer if it didn't have". Honestly, I write down a list on a piece of paper with those exact four columns. Fill out the first column first: for example, the last time I was horse shopping for my one star horse, the "must have" column had "(1) successfully completed a long format one star with an amateur, (2) consistent, safe, jumper, (3)16.1hh plus, (4) 14 years or younger." These were the absolute baseline for what I was looking for - summed up the horse quickly if I was describing it to someone selling one. My second column had "(1) gelding, (2) good on the flat." These are things I'd prefer, all things being equal, but could give some on. My third column is the dealbreakers: things I wouldn't buy under any circumstances. Mine usually include soundness issues that are not maintenance (e.g., one who has a chip in a knee or ongoing tendon issues, as opposed to one that needs its hocks done twice a year - the latter would be in my fourth category); cribbing; or COPD. I also put my price limit in this category - this is the dealbreaker price, as in, I will not, under any circumstances, pay more than X. Fourth column is the stuff you'd prefer not - I didn't particularly want a grey horse, nor did I want one who always had two rails, but I could live with it.

Then you apply that list to the horses you look at. Make yourself go through the exercise of checking off where every horse you look at fits within your chart: if it doesn't meet all of column 1 and/or it has anything in column 3, you strike it off your list no matter how pretty it is. This forces you to remind yourself what it is you want in a horse, and prevents the impulse buy. You use columns 2 and 4 to help decide between horses who meet your qualifications.

At the end of the day, the important part is thinking very carefully about what it is that's important to you. Everyone's got different priorities - I was looking for a horse to do a one star on, so I wanted something different than when we look for something fancy as a prospect for our pro. The hard work involved in up front deciding what you WANT in a horse will pay back buckets though, as you'll be better able to figure out if a horse is the right fit.

[asterix]

GotSpots has a very sensible system! DO clarify your baselines, much as she described, BEFORE you go to see ANY horse. Then do NOT go see a horse that falls outside of your baselines.

Ahem. I didn't do this once, and went to see an absolutely huge horse (17.3 and plenty of bone -- let's just say that the Big Man in my profile is, in fact, the smaller horse I bought later) despite being "too big." I fell madly in love with him, and, 2 more horses later, have come to accept that I am a confirmed BIG horse person. So while I "broke" a rule I thought mattered to me that first time, the third time I went shopping my new rule was I wouldn't see any horse under 16.3, 16.2 at the outside.

In the end, however, I have always found that the right horse is the one you can't stop thinking about riding. If you only go to see horses that fit into your "must have/can't have" grid, you can fall in love when the urge hits you :D.

[FlashGordon]

I think it is important to recognize your TRUE needs, your wants, and to be realistic about your goals. I see a lot of people over and under horsed because they aren't being honest with themselves about what they as a rider REALLY need.

For me personally, temperament is #1. I've finally gotten good at evaluating temperaments and that has taken a whole lot of guesswork out of the equation for me. I know exactly what types I want to avoid, and which I prefer.

But when it comes down to it, instinct is key... Best horse I had, well, I knew he was "the one" long before I even laid eyes on him in real life. And then I waited 2 years before I took the plunge. Drove 13 hours, rode him for 40 minutes, and he was mine. He lived up to every expectation I had of him, too.

Ironically the purchases/leases I've been most "logical" about are the ones that turned out to be disasters. Odd, but in my world, it has proven that my instincts are sometimes smarter than my brain! A horse can look great on paper, pass the PPE, but if I don't have that good vibe about it, I'm not bringing it home...

[SmallHerd]

THANK YOU for all of your insight! I am such a LIST person, but I never thought about columns. Maybe I could create an Excel spreasheet. :lol:

So here is where I am. I really thought I wanted a horse with some miles and experience so that I wasn't always working on the horse. I rode a mare that I really liked and am riding her again this weekend. She is older, been there, done that, etc.

In between, I rode a 4 year old Appendixm who wouldn't have made the list if I had one. Doesn't know much, but is solid W/T/C and really likes to jump. Good manners, good brain, sound, easy to adjust, etc. I have ridden her twice and REALLY REALLY like her. But she is petite. I have LONG legs and always looked at horses 16H or so, but I saw this little girl ridden and wanted to give it a go. I have watched the video of me riding, and I don't think we look bad, and she could still grow, right?

I guess I just have to decide what I really want. I promised myself that THIS TIME I would get a horse that I could tack up and just go, right now. My common sense tells me the older, more experienced horse would be the 'safe' bet, but that cute little willing to jump-the-moon girl just sticks in my head. I'll have to see how I feel after I ride the older mare again this weekend.

[Donkey]

When purchasing my last horse I was in a situation where after 7 months of looking and having PPEs not work out on 4 previous horses I suddenly had two prospects to choose from that met all of my criteria.

So I asked my coach, whom I was paying commission to, to tell me what horse to vet first (first clean vetting wins). So I went with her recommendation, the horse passed its PPE and I couldn't be happier. (Not to say the other horse wouldn't have worked out as well, but my new horse has far exceeded my expectations - she is such a good match personality wise)

But my point is that I feel that the commission I paid to my coach was by far some the best money I have ever spent in the horse industry. When in doubt, get a professional opinion!! It may save you a lot of money or help to ensure your success.

[ss3777]

The best advice I ever heard regarding horse shopping:

If you don’t like the horse’s temperament the day you meet him, walk away. You can not train personality. Maybe it is kind of like people; don’t marry them because you think you can change them. With the horses I have had in my barn I find this to prove out. My most favorite horse of all had a ...do not come in my stall I bite sign.... on his door the day I met him. 22 years later he was still the most territorial horse I have ever met. But boy could he do his job. Would not have worked out so well if I was looking for a snuggle bunny personality.

Good Luck!!

[horsetales]

I love lists like others posted, but if theres not a connection on an emotional level, its not the one. So many times you see posts on not clicking with their horse and its a heartbreaker for them. Temperment and personality are a big deal to me

[eventer_mi]

If I've done all my homework and tested the animal out, and I don't feel like looking at anything else (not because I'm sick of shopping, but because I CAN'T WAIT to get him home and ride him!), I know he's The One.

Case in point - I went to a small WB breeder in S. Carolina and had every intention of looking at several of her young horses. I looked at Oliver, tried him out, and then she pulled out another that I was interested in, but after longeing him, I just didn't want to get on. I wanted to ride Ollie again.

I'm glad I went with Oliver. Every time he whinnies in the pasture and comes running over for head scritchies, I smile and know he's The One.

[OneWish]

The last time I went shopping it was very easy for me to know. The "how do you KNOW" factor was that I ... was smiling while jumping. Seriously as simple as that. I knew he was the one because I was litterly having the time of my life jumping him! Now I wasn't completely crazy and just bought a horse that made me smile, he also fit every point on my list of what I wanted to the T. Now when does that ever happen?

So my advice to you is when you sit on the one that truly makes you happy (and he/she fits into your previous decided upon criteria) then that one is probably the one. Because remember you have to ride this horse everyday, why buy one that doesnt make you happy?

[BestHorses]

I like the lists GotSpots uses since I can get a little OCD over the search. :lol:

My problem is I will try horses and they are 98% good. Maybe the horse will spook once or something like that. And it will stick in my mind and I can't go through with it. DH thinks I will find something wrong with every horse. But I just had a horse on trial that when I went to try him he spooked at something. Seller assures me he's not usually like that, etc. Three weeks later I took him back because he was too spooky. So now I feel like I should listen to the little things the horse is trying to tell me because that issue will always be there. But it feels like I might be passing up a good horse because of a one-time thing. It's so hard to know for sure. Should I just assume the horse will always spook/pin ears/stumble etc. and move on?

Slightly off topic, but FlashGordon - how do you evaluate temperament to see if a horse is THE ONE?

[slp2]

Setting up your parameters and the "dealbreakers" vs. "what I can live with" characteristics are good. But, it's ideal if you can take the horse on trial for a little while. I know not every owner is willing to do this--but it really gives you some better insight on the horse. I tried a mare out and thought she seemed very willing and had nice gaits. I asked if they would let me take her on trial for 2 weeks (they said yes). That's when I got to see her true colors! Where I boarded they would bring the horses in from the pasture by letting them come careening into the barn, they would gallop right past the indoor (which had a 1/2 wall) and go skidding into their stalls. Needless to say, most of the horses being ridden in the indoor needed to get used to this routine before they would be settled about it. The first day my mare was there, I was riding her in the indoor when they let the horses in. :eek: This mare was alone in the indoor, me riding her, and she just kept trotting along, completely focused on her work through the entire "running in" chaos. That sealed the deal. I knew I needed to buy that horse!! I also found myself smiling a lot when I was riding her. And I still do! :D

[pharmgirl]

The criteria and lists that others have mentioned are definite requirements. That said, there are things that go by the way side when you find one that works. Case in point- I didn't really have a color requirement/preference, but I always said that appys (esp. ones without a mane/tail) were lowest on my list). What did I end up with? A giant, loud appy with no mane and tail and I wouldn't trade him for anything!
I'd say one thing for me as an AA was that I had to feel comfortable, and had to feel some sort of connection with them. It didn't have to be some magical farytail instant bond, but I had to feel drawn to them in some way. I am like that with a lot of things though; I usually just _know_ it when I feel it.
My boy seriously injured himself about six months after I got him, and people asked me if I regretted my decision to get him. I said definitely not, I wouldn't trade it for anything b/c he is really it for me- that is how I know.

[evntr06]

Being a timid adult ammy, I personally look for a horse to give me a feeling of complete trust and confidence, and make me feel like I can ride. Some horses will scare me if they twitch a muscle, but some others I would trust even if I fall off from a spook. It is some sort of quality and connection with animal that effect that, and their personalities. My logical buy did not turn out so well - I could not find connection with the horse, and we never got along. The things that did not bother me in other animals, drove me crazy with that individual. So, I think you should feel some sort of special connection with the amimal before you buy him/her. Some horses, you feel it off the bat, but with others you develop it over few weeks/months, yet others you just don't get at all. I think that it is not always possible to find THE ONE... Sometimes they accidently come into your life, sometimes they don't. I think it is OK to buy a horse that suits you in many other ways, but may not be THE ONE... As long as you enjoy your rides, and the horse fits your needs, everything else does not matter as much in the long run.

[In_]

When you find "the one" you will. just. know. You won't be able to describe or rationalize it. All of the horse's faults you saw before are suddenly "workable." And it just clicks.

The problem is, if you wait to find this, you may be searching for quite some time. With that said, I wish everyone the happiness and peace that only comes when working with a horse that is your other half.

[2869]

All my horses have come straight from the track so I will be no help there. But as someone who sells alot...
One customer came w/a binder and had 3 sheets of questions that she asked after her first ride. It was basically an interview. She was trying alot of horses so it was an easy way to keep them straight in her mind. I was pretty impressed with that and didnt mind at all.

Try and ride in as many situations as you can. Possibly flat and jump after seeing owner do the same and come back for a 2nd ride where you start the horse (groom, tack up, get on first), ride in ring again and maybe even go for a hack. Most places dont have facilities to xc school but if you can at least hack them you will get a sense of how they are outside of ring. Also, if you have only seen horse in indoor or outdoor, request seeing them in the opposite to make sure that they have no eversion to either.

[denny]

You only know it`s "The One" if you still think so 3-6 years of good riding later.

The rest is emotional fluff.

Or so I`ve found.

[snoopy]

You only know it`s "The One" if you still think so 3-6 years of good riding later.

The rest is emotional fluff.

Or so I`ve found.



Denny

You actually make a good point. It depends on what it is you want from the horse. I have been emotionally attached to one horse is who was rather average in his ability as an event horse...he was "the one" for me on an emotional level, I adored being around him. I then had a very good event horse who quite frankly I did not like. He gave me no pleasure out of the saddle..NONE. But as a competitive partner...he was "the one" for me.

[Jleegriffith]

I am similiar to 2869 in that I don't buy many personal horses but mostly horses for resale. I am just looking for temperament above anything but also 16+ h, geldings, sound w/ no blemishes or vices and good movers with conformation that leads me to believe they will jump well. Guessing on temperament is hard but I try to buy horses that have at least a month or two off the track. I will try them over some poles or low jumps, walk by something scary, possible ask them to walk over something scary, ride around the farm or out in the open and just see how the react when I push their buttons. I am buying horses that the average rider can ride so nothing that is making me wonder if I might have trouble staying on it.

When I sell horses I don't let them go on trial for the most part and I have plenty of good reasons for that. I encourage buyers to take the horses out of the ring, x-country, will trailer somewhere else and allow as many rides as possible to make that person feel comfortable but ultimately I believe you "know" within a ride or two. It is just a feeling one gets when they sit on a horse and you feel comfortable. I was almost sure I had one sold this past weekend when the girl was clocking around courses on him with a huge grin on her face but they thought they could get a more experienced horse for the amount of money they had to spend but I am doubting it. When you click with a horse it might just be worth it to be the one who puts the additional mileage on the horse simply because you do click and you might not find another horse you click with.

I like Gotspots list a lot especially if I was looking for a horse that I was planning on spending a good chunk of change for and going up the levels. You have to be realistic but also not compromise. I don't need a horse with a great personality as long as they are good to ride so that gives me a bit more freedom to choose those horses that other people might not. If they bite and kick I always seem to end up with them:D

[texang73]

Alot of great advice here. I will say that with my guy, his personality and good brain were what did it for me. :yes:

His "training" :rolleyes: up to that point had really messed him up, training-wise... but I knew that it could all be re-trained (or un-trained, if you will). He has a great brain, is a quick learner, and even though it's taken 2 years to un-train what he once knew, he's really coming into his own and is turning into a fabulous horse. :)

Good luck with your search!

[SmallHerd]

2869, that is exactly what I am going to do this weekend. I rode this mare after the owner rode her first, and we rode in the indoor (with jumps). I told the owner that I would like to come back, pull her out of the field myself, groom, and use my saddle. They have a small XC course on their property, so if this ground ever dries a bit, I will ride her out there too. I did ride her down the drive and back to the barn, but she was so hot and sweaty. It was an odd 70 degree day in February! We were all sweaty - LOL.

I've bought horses off the track before, and it is truly a crap shoot on so many levels, partuculary with personality. They change so much after the track, that the best guestimates are just that - guesses. I'm looking elsewhere this time, but LOFF those OTTBs!

Denny, that emotional 'fluff' is real for us girls. We want it all, and that includes fluff! :D

[fordtraktor]

My decisions are based on how much I like riding the horse. I buy green, but I make sure I hop them over something small to see how they take to it. I don't need to see amazing talent, but want a horse that that is willing.

I agree with Denny that you won't know the horse is "the one" until it proves itself. I have bought several on gut instinct -- you win some and you lose some. The best list in the world can't save you if you just don't get along.

[katie16]

THANK YOU for all of your insight! I am such a LIST person, but I never thought about columns. Maybe I could create an Excel spreasheet. :lol:

So here is where I am. I really thought I wanted a horse with some miles and experience so that I wasn't always working on the horse. I rode a mare that I really liked and am riding her again this weekend. She is older, been there, done that, etc.

In between, I rode a 4 year old Appendixm who wouldn't have made the list if I had one. Doesn't know much, but is solid W/T/C and really likes to jump. Good manners, good brain, sound, easy to adjust, etc. I have ridden her twice and REALLY REALLY like her. But she is petite. I have LONG legs and always looked at horses 16H or so, but I saw this little girl ridden and wanted to give it a go. I have watched the video of me riding, and I don't think we look bad, and she could still grow, right?

I guess I just have to decide what I really want. I promised myself that THIS TIME I would get a horse that I could tack up and just go, right now. My common sense tells me the older, more experienced horse would be the 'safe' bet, but that cute little willing to jump-the-moon girl just sticks in my head. I'll have to see how I feel after I ride the older mare again this weekend.


Sounds like you really have not made up your mind yet about what you truly want? As you have had horses before, what was it about them that didn't work out for you? Were they too fresh for you to "just get on and go" when you felt like it? Were they boring for you because they were not challenging enough? What do you want to do with the horse today (not six months from now or longer) and is either of these horses doing that right now? Answering questions like that might help discover what is best for you.

I had an adult re-rider (who was a VERY accomplished jr and young adult rider) that had taken several years off to have children. She decided that she wanted to get back into riding again and get a horse of her own again. She THOUGHT she wanted something she could show at the 3' - 3'6" level (we do h/j but I don't think that is relevant to this topic), that was reasonably fancy, and not so perfect that is didn't have a bit of a challenge to it (or it would be boring for her). More or less the kind of horse she used to have and love. Turned out that was just the opposite of what she really wanted! She discovered that now she didn't have the confidence and assertiveness that she used to have. In the back of her mind she worried about getting hurt (and then who would care for her kids). She came to the realization that she wasn't really going to have the time to show like she used to. She is now the very happy owner of one of the most unattractive (draft cross!) horses in my barn! However, he is a saint! If her kids have the flu and he sits for a week, she can pull him out and go for a hack in the woods without a worry. Her 4yr old daughter can walk around on him in the paddock by herself. He will quietly and happily do anything she wants. She has come to realize that even though she very much enjoyed her "past horse life", that will not work for her now and she is now enjoying another aspect "horse life".

I guess my point is that I think you need to do some more soul searching (without considering either horse in particular) and try to figure out what will make you the most happy and then try to select a horse that fits that category.

[zagafi]

How do you know? You look in the stall and if it's a gorgeous gray gelding with a silly upper lip, you buy him. :-P Oh, wait...that was me.

I think you already DO know, pal o' mine. You just need to trust your gut.

[Ibex]

It feels like "coming home" when you sit on them.

[Daatje]

You only know it`s "The One" if you still think so 3-6 years of good riding later.

The rest is emotional fluff.

Or so I`ve found.

So clearly put! :)

I have been suffocating in emotional fluff for the past 8 years with my sweet, cuddly, "gorgeous in dressage but absolutely useless as an event horse" mare.

She can jump well enough for BN, but is such a chicken hearted horse that she freezes in her tracks at the slightest change of footing/scenery on x-country and a-b-s-o-l-u-t-e-l-y refuses to budge.

I LOVE her, but I really want to event.....on an OTTB. Can't get past the "If I sell her I'll never see her again....(sniff).." to move on to another horse.

Damn it. :D

[Catalina]

I tend not to go with the emotional side but more of the training side when I horse shop. I do have an 'ideal' horse that I am looking for. For me it is a horse that has done a few recognized H.T.s with clean XC and bad dressage, 10 years old or younger, 16.2h minimum, gelding, and sound. Both of my horses fit those requirements. Next when I test rode them (both of them I rode maybe 10 minutes tops) my main goal was to see if they would respond to the way I rode. They both did, which said to me that we could form a parternership and work on improving the dressage.

My best advice is when you ride a horse you are thinking of buying, ride it like you normally would and see how it responds. If you ask for a longer step, or a leg yield, or a stretch, does the horse respond to the way you ask? Even if the effort is minimal at best, the fact that the horse responded to your aids is a good sign.

[SmallHerd]

Thanks everyone!

Catalina, that is great advice! I usually try to figure out how the horse likes to be asked, which is backwards! I should find out if they respond to ME and the way I ride.

[denny]

And don`t be hesitant about selling "The One" when/if he/she proves not to be.

For you emotional ones, this will be very hard!

[denny]

PS--Unless you`re very rich, and don`t mind fields of pasture pets.

[pharmgirl]

Good points, denny. I think I put down my thoughts on when I think they are the one to at least give a shot to. My vet always stressed that it takes a good year to really know if they are going to work out for you or not, and for me I agree with that. I have found for this AA that it can take that much time to truly figure out each other, especially if feedback is subtle. Also as an AA, if it's not fun anymore then things need to be reevaluated, even if it's hard emotionally.

[denny]

PPS---

Or would rather pat than ride---

[snoopy]

It is important to remember that your horse has a JOB to do...and that job will be different to everyone. If his job is to be a expensive pet then obviously you will needa horse that enjoys being stared at for hours at end and being slobbered over, some take offence to this. Some like to do their jobs under saddle and then left to get on with the rest of their day being left alone to graze. Some like both. There are so many factors when looking for the right horse. I know some who just could not bear with having a super star under saddle who they could not hang all over. It is important to ask yourself WHAT you want your horse to contribute to your life, if it has the talent, temperment, and looks should you require one, both or all of these things. A horse that does not bring you pleasure in the areas that are important to you is a waste of time and will only lead to an unhappy owner/horse.

[Blugal]

Make a list for a general idea.

Take an experienced person with me, who will be a second set of eyes and talk sense into me if there are any major no-nos.

Trust my gut. (The times I've bought based on the list but against my gut did NOT work out.)

Listen to my Dad - he has an uncanny ability to pick decent horses, even when they don't meet my list criteria.

I like Jimmy Wofford's suggestion:
"If I had to pick one thing to hang my hat on, I would want the horse that I was going to buy to have a face that I would enjoy seeing poked over the stall webbing every morning, waiting for breakfast."

I think it was also Jimmy who said something along the lines of needing to believe in your horse, or you'll never make excuses for him. (He said it much more eloquently...) Basically, there is a difference between just dealing with a horse, and enjoying a partnership with a horse; you want to feel that connection, and when something inevitably goes wrong, you are "in the horse's corner."

[Threedaychick]

I spent a long time searching for my current boy and my only criteria were good looking, quiet, and a good mover. I purchased for a resale that would be fun for anyone to ride once he gets some training on him. But I'm enjoying him so much that I don't know about selling!
I knew he was "the one" when a trampoline went blowing in the wind past the field we were riding in and he just stood there and watched it. (we had just pulled him out of the field he had been sitting in for a year after being on the track!) I was sold on him right then and there!

[zagafi]

It is important to remember that your horse has a JOB to do...and that job will be different to everyone. If his job is to be a expensive pet then obviously you will needa horse that enjoys being stared at for hours at end and being slobbered over, some take offence to this. Some like to do their jobs under saddle and then left to get on with the rest of their day being left alone to graze. Some like both. There are so many factors when looking for the right horse. I know some who just could not bear with having a super star under saddle who they could not hang all over. It is important to ask yourself WHAT you want your horse to contribute to your life, if it has the talent, temperment, and looks should you require one, both or all of these things. A horse that does not bring you pleasure in the areas that are important to you is a waste of time and will only lead to an unhappy owner/horse.

This is a really good point. I would not be happy with a "rockstar" who wouldn't let me play "Barbie Dream Horse" with him. Sometimes I like just hanging out and having a looong grooming session (though in my defense, I do have a gray) to pretty him up. And even though he's an OTTB who likes having a job, he's also ok being loved on. A lot. LOL!

I have no upper level aspirations, so having a horse I could have fun with AND could safely have around my kids was paramount. When I found out my boy gave his owner's 4 year old son pony rides up and down the shedrow (while he was still running!), I was sold. Everything else was gravy.

[Lincoln]

The ones I've loved owning were the ones when I tried them I didn't want to get off and was breathless to try them again the next day. It's funny how some horses can do ridiculous stuff and you feel just fine on them, while others you don't even feel like you have a place to sit on their backs. Chemistry or somethin'.

[starkissed]

I have never bought a horse but my criteria start out with age
for me, I probably wouldn't buy anything over 3 or 4
I like them to be pretty (I know ridiculous but still)- but that goes hand in hand with a good build
I want them to move well and if they have jumped I want to see that.

And I want to get an idea of temperament, most behavioral things can be fixed with proper handling, but some horses are just more prone to doing dumb/undesirable things.

But I don't know how helpful that is, I have never bought a trained horse, I like doing it myself

[LSM1212]

Yep... lists help. That's what I did. I had a "must have" list, a "would like to have" list and then a "can't deal with" list.

So before even meeting the horse, I asked my list of questions. If the answers were acceptable, I went and saw the horse. Had my trainer get on first and then I would get on.

For my current guy, I looked for awhile. After my last horse purchase that turned into a nightmare, I was trying to avoid that situation again (that was more of an impulse buy and a "oooo, she's so pretty" thing).

I tried a bunch of horses before finding Stitch. And with all of them, even though they met most of my criteria, I just didn't get that "wow" factor. I'm not one to fall in love at first sight. Most of the horses I saw, my reaction was "eh... he's okay".

But not to sound cliche... I knew Stitch was the one when I first laid eyes on him. And then after watching him go, then riding him myself.... it was set in stone. Did alot of praying during the 3 hour PPE (I wanted to make sure there was nothing wrong w/ him). He passed and then after the negotiations, he was mine. :)

I loved his personality on the ground and under saddle. And he met my every need at that time in my riding experience. I thought I might outgrow him and get bored (since I was looking for a packer type and he was it) once I progressed. But you know what's funny? It's over 3 years later and he has changed as my riding ability has changed. So he's still a little bit of a challenge. So no worries on me outgrowing him. He'll be with me for the rest of his life.

[Lori B]

Great advice here.

I would encourage you to recall, in as much detail as you can, the horses and rides you have most disliked, what doesn't work for you, and be honest about it when you shop. I leased an adorable little mare who will jump nearly anything, honest, sound, etc. But I hated her fast feeling small canter, never got comfortable with it. I know that a horse like that will never work for me, no matter how right they are otherwise.

Don't pick a horse for the rider you hope to become, or the rider you were when you were 17 and didn't know about gravity yet. Shop for a horse that you can safely and enjoyably ride as the rider you are today.

[eventer_mi]

I've got to say that of the last four horses I've purchased, only one did not quite fit the bill for me due to temperment issues (but man, was he fun to jump!). I'm developing a bit of a reputation (thanks, 53!) for the ability to find those safe, sound, attractive types that place well under an ammy rider, so I feel somewhat qualified to post. ;)

Denny pointed out that you must be prepared to sell. I totally believe this. I never buy a horse strictly for the intent of resell, like a lot of experienced posters on this BB, but I buy with an eye for resell, in case situations change and things don't work out for me or I need something else. What may be "the one" for you today might not be "the one" for you several years down the road. Case in point - Sam, my Paint I just sold. He was "the one" for me for quite a few years, although it grew on me over time (he was originally bought to be my husband's horse), and then I found Oliver who is basically the same temperment in a body with more ability, and I decided to narrow down my herd to one, so Sam had to go. It was painful, but the woman he's with now just loves him and searched quite a while for him.

Temperment is a tricky thing to test for. I'm not a big believer of trial periods because I think that any horse, except for the tried and true campaigners, are going to act differently for the first few months in a strange place, with a strange owner. Oliver was one spooky little pony when I brought him home. I tested him the same way I test all my horses - walk them over scary things, ride them away from the barn (or lead them if they're too green to be ridden), ride/walk them by an open car door, etc. A lot of it comes down to a gut feeling. If the horse spooks, and the owner says, "oh, that's the first time he's ever done that", what were the circumstances of that spook? Was a herd of deer erupting under brush underneath your nose (that actually happened with Sam's new ower - they were out on the trail and he didn't do a thing - such a good pony)? If so, I think horses are entitled to a spook. Or was it something routine, like a bucket or a fallen branch? Then, I evaluate the spook itself - was it a jump in the skin? Or did the horse spin and try and make it back to the barn?

You don't WANT a horse to be perfect when you try it out, or you'll never how your horse is going to react when things really DO bother him. What you DO want to know is if you can handle what he throws at you. I figure that if I can and feel comfortable riding a horse through something, I can work with it to get it to the point of where the majority of others can ride and feel comfortable, too. The one horse that I sold for a lot less than he was worth was a very tense, nervous horse, and he was BIG. That didn't bother his new owner, who evented on a very hot, crazy TB, but it would bother most people, so I sold him on.

Good luck!

[ReadySetEvent]

My most favorite horse of all had a ...do not come in my stall I bite sign.... on his door the day I met him. 22 years later he was still the most territorial horse I have ever met. But boy could he do his job. Would not have worked out so well if I was looking for a snuggle bunny personality.

I ARGEE! It's all depends on what your looking for...are you looking for a snuggle bunny to spend time with at the barn and brush for hours. Then your going to have to maybe let go of some of your other wants. I had a horse once that I always said...His heart was as big as any fence I jumped. He was my " the one" horse soul mate. But, in no way was he ever going to do upper levels (which took me a long time to deal with). Though my current horse may not be the snuggle bunny...He's "the one" I could go advance on in three years. There choice you have to face for the future of your riding. My best advice when going to look at horses is if your buying from a pro talk to the working student...they know more about the horse then sometimes the pro! :lol: Also, I would try to do as many phases as you can. Always try twice and when you do try to get one in the AM (maybe the first time it's been riden) and one in the PM (maybe the second time it's been riden that day), Just a pointer!

[Zephyr]

When you find "the one" you will. just. know. You won't be able to describe or rationalize it. All of the horse's faults you saw before are suddenly "workable." And it just clicks.

The problem is, if you wait to find this, you may be searching for quite some time. With that said, I wish everyone the happiness and peace that only comes when working with a horse that is your other half.

Gotta agree with this post!

I've ridden 4 horses in my life that were "perfect" (for me). Three were Appy mares; one was a TB gelding.

Unfortunately, none of them were for sale or I wasn't buying when I rode them. The common factor, though, was the "click" - you immediately ride the horse better than anyone else, even if you're not the best rider ... and everyone else takes note of it, too. You just LOVE jiving with that horse.

When it came time to buy, I settled for the best of 10 or so that I tried, and I don't regret it. He's bombproof and a fun jumper, even 7 years later. However, we'll never have that "jive" that translates into good dressage :D I still wouldn't trade him in though :)

[evans36]

I don't really believe in the idea of The One. I have learned from every horse I've worked with. I do know that there's chemistry with some and not with others... but there's not just one horse that will work for you if you are looking to become a better horseman.

I bought my guy from a picture. He was well-conformed and big, which I liked, but there was something about his face and his expression that caught me. He had a wise eye but also looked like a wise guy. I did all the right things too - PPE, talking to people who worked with him, all that. I'm not saying you should be an idiot and buy an unsound horse to event because he has a nice face and 4 white socks.

After a year and a half, this is the most uneventful competitive partnership I've ever had, but I have learned more from this horse than any other. Not just about my own riding, but about horse care, saddle fit, and honing my instincts in working with the horse, etc. My goals have changed because of the horse. Having him really pointed out some things that I needed more work on and helped me fill in holes in a different, less sexy area of horsemanship.

Do I love being around him? More than anything. Would I sell him tomorrow? Happily, if the right buyer came along and I thought he'd continue to progress with him. He's cool as hell and I love him. But every bond with every horse has something new and different in it... comparing the good ones to each other are like apples and oranges.

And obviously I send a strong second out to Jim Wofford's statement about buying a horse because you like seeing his face poked over the stall door.

It also occurs to me that this might tell me something about my romantic life...

[snoopy]

Don't pick a horse for the rider you hope to become, or the rider you were when you were 17 and didn't know about gravity yet. Shop for a horse that you can safely and enjoyably ride as the rider you are today.



This is great advice...especially for all those who have left riding for a while to get married, have children, build a career etc. Riding is not like it was when we were teenagers. It is amazing how some of the horses we once rode as youngsters are no longer suitable for us as adults.

[Zephyr]

And obviously I send a strong second out to Jim Wofford's statement about buying a horse because you like seeing his face poked over the stall door.

Oh, that reminds me! When I was deciding on my horse, I thought of that very phrase ... because my horse has the CUTEST face I have ever seen in my entire life. Still does. That pretty much sealed the deal :) (all other things being good too, of course)

[SmallHerd]

This is all such great advice. I am really trying to have this journey led by common sense, which has not been my strong suit in past purchases. :) It's good to know I have reinforcements here! THANK YOU!!! I have a second ride on a really nice mare this weekend, and yes, I would LOFF to see her face hanging over the stall door every morning.

By the way, I made a spreadsheet. This mare wins by a point or 2, with a few more questions to be answered. But like I said, I am not rushing into anything. It's good to know that sometimes you don't KNOW right away, even when the MUST HAVEs are met. Sometimes it is good to be practical, yes?

[snoopy]

I am really trying to have this journey led by common sense..... Sometimes it is good to be practical, yes?


Sometimes???!!!;)

[LisaB]

I FINALLY learned that I can't pick them! Seriously! My keeper is one that I would not have picked in a million years. I went through an agent who worked with my must have list and my budget. Like I need a gelding that is 16h or less. And she found it. But she also talked to my trainer and saw me ride so she knew what type of rider I am and what I can handle.

[SWpreciousfew]

i have to agree with what someone else said.... you feel like your just at home when its the right one... thats how it has always been with my boy.