loaning things

[mickeydoodle]

Just curious, if you have several dressage saddles- quite nice ones- would you loan one to go to another state with someone elses horse for their trainer to ride in - for more than two months?

[appychik]

Uhh, no. Not unless I knew all parties and even then I'd be hesitant. Regardless, I'd draw up some form of a contract... making sure that the saddle (and be as specific as possible ie: serial numbers and everything) is returned in same condition, otherwise they owe $ XXX.XX to replace suchandsuch (possibly getting the going rate for that particular saddle used).

Anyways, too much of a hassle for me so I wouldn't do that. But, to each their own.

[stryder]

why?
the person has a horse and no saddle? The "trainer" has no saddle?

Seems like a good way to lose a nice saddle.

[dwblover]

No, I wouldn't. If I had a close friend who I knew took care of their tack, than perhaps I would loan it for them to use only, but I would not let the friend have it so their trainer can ride in it. It's too easy for the saddle to get lost in the shuffle at a big training barn, and you don't know who will be handling it or using it. My friend had a brand new Prestige 2000D and sent it along with her horse to her trainer for the summer. Horse was going to be in full training and it was agreed that the saddle was only to be used by trainer on my friend's horse. Well, my friend shows up unexpectedly one afternoon at trainer's barn and finds her saddle in the back of a pick-up under some mowing equipment! Trainer explains that she took the saddle to a show for her other students to use and must have forgotten it in the truck!! :o:o:o

[camohn]

My question would be why would a trainer not have a saddle?

If it was a case that my own horse was going to a trainer with a custom made saddle that fit him/her to a T that would be a different issue.

Maybe also if I lent it to a friend I really trusted because they did not have a saddle that fit their horse until they were able to obtain one that did. But a trainer? If they are in it for money they should have a saddle!! (more than one to fit a variety of horses.....)

[oldenmare]

No. No. No.

Too many variables - none of which are in your favor.

[thatmoody]

We have lots of saddles in various tree sizes and configurations - we could probably find a proper fit for most horses. Maybe, if the horse were very difficult to fit, but not without a carefully written agreement. I wouldn't want to be RESPONSIBLE for someone else's saddle anyway. But if I had a horse that was VERY difficult to fit I'd rather try some of mine first and then contact the owner if I can't fit the horse properly.

[rugbygirl]

I would lend it, but I would ask for a deposit. For the full value of the saddle ;). Oops, that sounds a lot like buying it. Which they should do!

If you can stand to let the saddle go, sell it to them and agree to buy it back minus any damage/repair costs after a certain period of time.

Too often, borrowed tack is NEGLECTED tack.

[merrygoround]

After that length of time she may think she owns it. :eek:

My answer is, No!

[mickeydoodle]

Well I did loan it, (saddle cost $4200 last year). It is in another state, I am friends with both trainer and owner. Trainer does not have saddles, owners have to have saddle for horse. Owner has a second horse, that is where their own saddle is.

The kicker is, the owner is mad at me! I guess I am too free with loaning things. The saga started when I loaned a different saddle- saddle A- to another friend while they were searching for a new saddle. Then owner and trainer took saddle A from the friend (they assumed that one of the several new saddles that friend was trying would work for her) and tried it on owner's horse. They found it fit well, but did not tell me anything about this- did not ask me at the time. Week or so later I get e-mail from owner, asking to use saddle and send it with trainer. I say ok, as long as it is ok with friend who had it first. Then first friend wants saddle back as they have not found a new saddle that works. I tell trainer that they can try my saddles B and C (I have this inability to sell things, I collect them, I actually have 5 saddles from 25 years of riding) which are actually newer and more $$ saddles than A. B fits horse, ok. But owner is furious with me, says it was my idea for saddle not to go with horse, won't understand that it was the original borrowers desire to have it back. Said that I almost made things really bad for owner (needs to sell horse, needs saddle for trainer and potential buyers to ride in). I tried to explain my side of things, including that I was taken aback by not being asked until later about the saddle being used, but no results, owner thinks I have really hurt them. I think I should be forgiven for whatever it is that really upset owner, they got a nicer saddle and it is in another state with the horse! No contract, I just asked them to clean it daily. (They would never assume they owned the saddle, and I would expect that they would pay for damage or repair.)

So I guess this is just a vent, it seems to me that I have acted reasonably, but maybe not. don't know

[buck22]

sounds like squabbling over who gets to ride in the nice saddle.:lol: and since you've provided saddles that fit their horses, nobody is in a rush to go shopping for a permanent one. You're being beyond reasonable by having lent out a high priced saddle to begin with.

I know where you're coming from, I'm a massive tack hoarder and cannot possibly use 1/20th of the tack I own, I constantly and freely lend things out, including somewhat pricey saddles, dvd collections, irreplaceable pads, and whatnot. To make matters even worse :D I mail out possessions to people I've never met :D just say 'you broke it you bought it, return it when you're done, have fun!" :D and yes, in all different states.

The only thing that ticks me off is if a person lends my object to another person without asking me first. That I find highly disrespectful.

I reckon one day I'll get slapped upside the head with a healthy dose of reality, but other than having a saddle once returned to me with a bit of mold on it, I've had no issues and basically trust people.

I just hope your friends can wear their big-girl pants and sort this out, and not pester you about who gets to play with the nice saddle .... and see how genuinely generous you are.... not many people lend out $4k saddles

[blackhorse6]

Ummm, just my very humble thought here..."friends" have enough $$ to buy a horse and have it in training or what ever but can't afford to buy a saddle? Or what ever the reason is.. Just is all WRONG! No matter how many saddles you own or why, no one including so called friends should be using them..You are setting yourself up for exactly what happened.. I would think the "trainer" would know better..

[MEP]

Sorry Mickeydoodle, I think this is one of the few threads where most people will agree, "Don't loan the saddle"!

Since the deed is already done, and the person who borrowed the saddle is already p/o'd because you sent another saddle - well, that's just tough luck isn't it! This person seems to be acting like they are very "entitled." Shame on them!

I hope this doesn't come back to bite you. You've already gone above and beyond the call of friendship just by lending the valuable saddle in the first place, let alone lending the one that the friend seems to be 'demanding.' Good luck getting your saddle back in the pre-loan condition.

[Ambrey]

Anybody who gets mad at you for not doing them a favor in *quite* the right way gets to find out how it is when you don't do favors for them at all.

Tell them UPS will be by on Tuesday to pick up the saddle, please have it boxed and ready to go. Without you causing them trouble, they will easily be able to iron out the rest of their difficulties.

[Runanhide]

I'm sorry, this upsets me just reading about it. Wow. Talk about a good deed gone bad.

Mickeydoodle, you have no obligation to lend your new saddle, and, any friend borrowing it should be bending over backwards in appreciation. At the very least, your "friend" should show a modicum of gratitude, not attitude!

It seems sometimes that when one is perceived to have a lot of "stuff," other people think that one's individual items are less meaningful. Of course, that is ridiculous, but, it could explain everyone else being so carefree with your many possessions.

I do hope you can retrieve your tack. But, it sounds like that may be difficult, since the loan seems to be "open-ended" and the friendship(s) in jeopardy.

* SIGH *

How does the saying go... Nice guys finish last? No good deed goes unpunished? Phooey.

[mickeydoodle]

I am not worried about the saddles coming back, I know they will - and if damaged I know they would repair them. It is just the angst involved, I hate people being mad at me! What I wish I had done was kept my mouth shut and let friend and owner fight it out over the saddle- or like Solomon offered to cut it in half. I don't mind that both of them now have one of my saddles so much as the owner being so angry.

[siegi b.]

Hey Mickeydoodle.... do you have anything in a size 17.5 that I can borrow for the foreseeable future??? :-)

No good deed shall go unpunished!

[Brockstables]

Don't loan anything that you absolutely want back someday...:no:

[dwblover]

You are a very nice and very patient friend. If someone actually got angry with me because they loaned out MY saddle without asking, well let's just say everyone involved would be getting a visit from me to collect all of my tack.:o

[atr]

Good Lord! You have nothing to feel bad about!

What a pair of spoilt, entitled children pretending to be adults.

[lizathenag]

my first thought was a saddle is stuff, way less important than a horse or a friend. I loan my stuff all the time. It gets used. I borrow stuff. I was given the chance to ride and hunt wonderful horses as a kid and probably didn't groom them well enough. Nobody died.

[fiftysomething]

Just curious, if you have several dressage saddles- quite nice ones- would you loan one to go to another state with someone elses horse for their trainer to ride in - for more than two months?

No! I know how nice your saddles are and how hard you work!

[ESG]

My question would be why would a trainer not have a saddle?

Mine, too. Sorry, but a trainer that doesn't own saddle(s) can't be much of a trainer. What does s/he do when other horses come in without their own tack? Get someone else to lend? Sheesh! :rolleyes:

Anybody who gets mad at you for not doing them a favor in *quite* the right way gets to find out how it is when you don't do favors for them at all.

Tell them UPS will be by on Tuesday to pick up the saddle, please have it boxed and ready to go. Without you causing them trouble, they will easily be able to iron out the rest of their difficulties.

Well, the lunar and solar confluences must be either perfectly aligned or completely out of whack, because I agree with Ambrey. :p

Good Lord! You have nothing to feel bad about!

What a pair of spoilt, entitled children pretending to be adults.

You forgot stupid, ungrateful and selfish. :D

mickeydoodle, these are not "friends". Well, the person you originally lent the saddle to, is, but these other two wingnuts need to get their heads out of their butts and buy their own damned tack. The very idea of a trainer with "no saddles" is ridiculous, to me. :no:

[Foxtrot's]

If you have to asks the question -- then you probably know the answer. Sometimes we want to be sooo nice all the time.

[mickeydoodle]

yep, I am an idiot. saddles are with both people who wanted them- first friend has the saddle they borrowed first, and second friend (horse owner, needs to sell horse) has newer, much more expensive saddle out of state with horse and trainer. I am just stupid I guess. Second friend is still mad at me for the almost "my horse will not have a saddle" problem. I expect both saddles to come back eventually. I will take this as a painful learning experience, and not loan things again.!!!!!!!

[tempichange]

yep, I am an idiot. saddles are with both people who wanted them- first friend has the saddle they borrowed first, and second friend (horse owner, needs to sell horse) has newer, much more expensive saddle out of state with horse and trainer. I am just stupid I guess. Second friend is still mad at me for the almost "my horse will not have a saddle" problem. I expect both saddles to come back eventually. I will take this as a painful learning experience, and not loan things again.!!!!!!!

Say... Mickey, can you lend me an FEI schoolmaster?

;)

[mickeydoodle]

He is already loaned to a friend in OH>

[Runanhide]

I don't know whether to do this: :lol:
Or this: :eek:

[tempichange]

He is already loaned to a friend in OH>

Darn... I have a bridge in Brooklyn I can give you in exchange;)

[Foxtrot's]

My dear old Dad used to say, "Neither a lender or a borrower be."

I don't agree, really, but it is a warning to be prepared for the consequences. It was in an era when cars were special and he never lent his car to anyone. I think I have quit lending out books, though.

[lvyrhrs]

No!!!!!

I'm going through this right now. My bleeding heart wanted to help someone that people I knew knew, but I didn't personally. This person had a visiting exchange student from Germany, and needed a dressage saddle since she wasn't comfy riding western. I had an older synthetic dressage saddle I offered to let them borrow -- all sorts of promises to take care and return promptly on said student's departure when this item was needed -- 2 years later, I'm still trying to get saddle back -- and I'm being made out to be the bad person here. I'm the bad guy because I'm insisting borrower spends 17-20 bucks to just mail the thing back to me!

Granted, this saddle was nothing fancy, but like everything else I own, I worked for it and had not intended to give it away. So, yes, I'm a bit ticked off about how this has worked out. I did learn a valuable lesson though!

[Sansena]

Just curious, if you have several dressage saddles- quite nice ones- would you loan one to go to another state with someone elses horse for their trainer to ride in - for more than two months?

Unless you're prepared to never see the saddle again, or worse have it returned destroyed;

NO.