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denny
Jan. 17, 2008, 11:53 AM
It is widely rumoured that 5 deprived/depraved female working students on a Virginia horse farm have captured an innocent young eventer, and are keeping him chained in the hayloft, only allowing him partial freedom for their special version of a "work-release" program.
Interestingly, morale on this farm has skyrocketed, and these women are considering franchising their scheme to other barns.
This is actual fact, not rumor, as I heard this from someone who heard it from an outstandingly reliable source.
If anyone has other details, please provide them.

eqsiu
Jan. 17, 2008, 11:54 AM
He won't be innocent for long! :winkgrin:

LisaB
Jan. 17, 2008, 12:04 PM
Ah but you see the flaw in your story?
An INNOCENT young MALE eventer
No such thing!
He probably bought custom made handcuffs to fit him perfectly.
And any gifts to him have to be battery operated since there's no electricity running up in a hayloft.

AlexMakowski
Jan. 17, 2008, 12:13 PM
When you find out more details let me know. Are these women good looking? Looking for another work release student?

AHAHA. Just kidding.

CookiePony
Jan. 17, 2008, 12:32 PM
Denny, you are neither innocent nor young (no offense). But I cannot figure out for the life of me why they allowed you access to the internet????

eqsiu
Jan. 17, 2008, 12:39 PM
Ah but you see the flaw in your story?
An INNOCENT young MALE eventer
No such thing!


They have to start out innocent at some point...

They just don't stay that way for long!

denny
Jan. 17, 2008, 12:42 PM
Hey, it`s cold rain, there`s nothing going on,and so when I read that a horse has been kidnapped by Canadians, I just felt it was my civic duty to warn young male eventers that their very freedom may be in peril as well, because of a similar kidnapping ring being run by event girls, who, as we all know, will stop at nothing in their quest for gold, fame and glory, including incapacitating the competition.
Soon, I suspect, Will C, and others like him won`t walk onto the grounds of an event without armed guards.
Then, if this perilous slide continues, can we doubt that before long the only males we see at events will be on leashes?

HiJumpGrrl
Jan. 17, 2008, 12:44 PM
Now why the heck didn't I think of something like this? Honestly...

eqsiu
Jan. 17, 2008, 12:44 PM
Denny dear, what virile young man would turn down a kidnapping by fit, beautiful women? You're not old enough to be getting senile...

pegasusmom
Jan. 17, 2008, 12:48 PM
Soon, I suspect, Will C, and others like him won`t walk onto the grounds of an event without armed guards.


Oh Christ. . . more expense?? Maybe it's a good thing Andrew's father is in the business he is in. :lol::lol:

On the other hand, the leash idea doesn't sound too bad to me!

The Germans would call today's forecast here "sau-wetter" (pig weather).

denny
Jan. 17, 2008, 12:53 PM
Yep, mom, your boy is definitely at high risk.

Long Shadow Farm
Jan. 17, 2008, 12:56 PM
Humm....

The leashes (or maybe at least collars) would denote the taken ones. This could be a good system. <G> We could maybe make up collars of different colors to show if he is taken or available and net worth! I loff it!

Bobbi

Badger
Jan. 17, 2008, 12:56 PM
Oh Christ. . . more expense?? Maybe it's a good thing Andrew's father is in the business he is in. :lol::lol:

On the other hand, the leash idea doesn't sound too bad to me!

The Germans would call today's forecast here "sau-wetter" (pig weather).

I can see it now..."Back from the hot sands of the middle east, our fearless and highly trained special ops officer finds himself stumped at every turn trying to protect his teenage son from the perilous clutches of the notorious eventer babes, determined as they are to see innocence quashed and life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness and finish lines enjoyed to the nth degree."

flutie1
Jan. 17, 2008, 01:05 PM
"... what virile young man would turn down a kidnapping by fit, beautiful women?"

Well ... I can think of a few!

deltawave
Jan. 17, 2008, 01:09 PM
Well ... I can think of a few!

*SNORT* :lol:

CanTango1
Jan. 17, 2008, 01:15 PM
Well I wish you the best off luck ! Im crossing my fingers and hoping in the long run you can get 5 ladies to all get along while sharing 1 man !

Be careful not to get to sweaty as well that hay rash can be a real pain in the A**!!!!!

eqsiu
Jan. 17, 2008, 01:18 PM
"... what virile young man would turn down a kidnapping by fit, beautiful women?"

Well ... I can think of a few!

Virile STRAIGHT young men, I should have said. :yes:

denny
Jan. 17, 2008, 01:19 PM
Sources have revealed that a consortium of rabid event-babes have secretly engaged Tanya Harding to perfect new methods of "Athlete Equalization", which will allow them to totally dominate the sport. No longer will these women tolerate being defeated by men, and this cruel scheme of Tanya`s is only their first step to finish the job of banishing males , even those men who agree wear breeches.
"They can`t ride with their hands tied", was Tanya`s advice.

eqsiu
Jan. 17, 2008, 01:21 PM
"They can`t ride with their hands tied", was Tanya`s advice.

I met a paraequestrian rider with no arms...

Keep 'em busy with other things, that's my advice!

LisaB
Jan. 17, 2008, 01:27 PM
In todays episode of Tanya Teaching:
"The run up while being unnoticed"
Find a dark part of the arena, you know the part that the horse thinks there's horse eating dragon lurking behind the rail. Sit and wait until IMER(innocent male event rider) is cheesing it up with another young hot female event rider. They are too busy making goo goo eyes at each to notice you running up fast and low.
For preparation, the horse he has knows you so running up to him won't be a big deal and he won't alert IMER.
As you swiftly run up, have handcuffs open, facing the inside. Then quickly reach up and slap the handcuff on one wrist. This has be practiced. If you have a large dog, they think it's great fun to be the handcuff test dummy. Then secure handcuff to him and the other to yourself and pull him off the horse and into the hayloft...

riverbell93
Jan. 17, 2008, 01:31 PM
I knew there was a reason I've always been drawn to eventing :lol: The 'work-release' pun was awesome.

Eventer55
Jan. 17, 2008, 01:34 PM
Yep, this is definately a snow day. Perfect for rabid event-babes. :lol::lol::lol:

Eventer55
Jan. 17, 2008, 02:24 PM
Pedro called he say "Event-babes, dey r running south of de boooorder now." Dey has de young boy wearing a sombrero." :eek:

tx3dayeventer
Jan. 17, 2008, 03:17 PM
You guys make me laugh. thank you

pegasusmom
Jan. 17, 2008, 03:46 PM
Unchain my heart. . . .

Apparently event babes are not cruel and unusual punishment. His mother is horrified.

AngelEventer
Jan. 17, 2008, 04:42 PM
Hey, it`s cold rain, there`s nothing going on,and so when I read that a horse has been kidnapped by Canadians, I just felt it was my civic duty to warn young male eventers that their very freedom may be in peril as well, because of a similar kidnapping ring being run by event girls, who, as we all know, will stop at nothing in their quest for gold, fame and glory, including incapacitating the competition.
Soon, I suspect, Will C, and others like him won`t walk onto the grounds of an event without armed guards.
Then, if this perilous slide continues, can we doubt that before long the only males we see at events will be on leashes?

If this "Will C" you speak of is the one I'm thinking of... When I met him he did not lead me to believe that he is ACTUALLY innocent. Don't let him fool you...

Painted Wings
Jan. 17, 2008, 05:32 PM
http://www.pbase.com/lesliegra/image/78141362

http://www.pbase.com/lesliegra/image/78141361

http://www.pbase.com/stl_don/image/78179741

Don't know how he gets the wind to blow his hair just right.

flutie1
Jan. 17, 2008, 05:51 PM
He's so good looking he should be illegal!

tecumsea
Jan. 17, 2008, 06:39 PM
y'all owe me a new key board at work. ! Thanks for the Laugh.

denny
Jan. 17, 2008, 06:53 PM
I have a friend, no joke, when he visited our farm one time and saw how tough and strong all the event girls were, this was his exact quote:
"Whoa, Denny, those are some scarey women! Nice girls, I guess, but their knuckles drag."
So guys, watch out. If they come to get you, you`re toast.
And if this whole kidnapping thing is part of an eventing conspiracy designed to let them (rabid event chicks) win, then Jimmy and Mike and I are glad we rode back when eventing was safe for clean cut American youth.

bornfreenowexpensive
Jan. 17, 2008, 07:08 PM
And if this whole kidnapping thing is part of an eventing conspiracy designed to let them (rabid event chicks) win, then Jimmy and Mike and I are glad we rode back when eventing was safe for clean cut American youth.


yeah right!;)

annikak
Jan. 17, 2008, 07:24 PM
Flutie...

Oh dear Lord- I am too old for such things to happen to my heart...where IS Deltawave...I need Cardio treatment....

Eye Candy = W C

retreadeventer
Jan. 17, 2008, 08:14 PM
Forget the young innocent ones. The older ones are far more interesting and easier to get along with! Oh and a long time knuckle dragger here....sigh.....

eventer_mi
Jan. 17, 2008, 08:22 PM
Re: Will Coleman...

I worked the warmup arena of a show that I was entered in, and met WC in person. And all I can say is, those pictures don't do him justice. Maybe if USEA featured HIM in a few commercials, we'd have a few more people interested in eventing!

Denny, I didn't want to tell you this because I wasn't sure how you'd take it, but there is a little rumour going around about you and the predominantly-female students you have - apparently you're quite the womanizer - did you know that? :lol: I heard that rumour from one of the NH gurus at my barn - she thought she was warning me away from you and your depraved proclivities. So, I guess all straight men are now fair game!

denny
Jan. 17, 2008, 08:44 PM
They think I`m their grandfather. Sigh. How the mighty are fallen!
( Well, maybe not very mighty compared to event girls!!!)
Is your good horse sound yet?

53
Jan. 17, 2008, 09:13 PM
See, now this ruins everything. I have sworn up and down to Mr. 53, a.k.a. DH, that ALL men associated with horses play way, way, way on the other side of the fence, which he had accepted hook, line and sinker. This sort of information will ruin my deeply ingrained web of lies.

So thanks a lot for posting the pictures of the eye candy (YUMMERS!) and bringing up depraved proclivities, chained kidnappings, etc. Geez guys.

olympicdreams04
Jan. 17, 2008, 09:16 PM
I seriously couldn't breath for a few moments there. I haven't laughed that hard in atleast a week! And that includes watching the woman in the white sun dress @ the OBS sale get shat on today by projectile feces of a spinning yearling. Denny, you have a sense of humor longer than most advanced cross country courses...I'm sure I could go on to insinuate that you might have other things of equal length but that is probably uncalled for. You do look mighty fine in the latest Chronicle picture though. I think you smile might best Will's. Now, on a interesting note, WHENEVER someone hears that a young event babe is involved with another eventer, their first two guesses are Will C followed by Will F. Hate to tell you girls, but there are several other fine young men out there of the single straight variety. I might even venture a guess that one or two of them are amazing...er...riders. Evil grin. Of course, no first hand experience here, simply speculation. Is anyone really surprised that this incident came from VA, though? I mean really...Middleburg is like the Hollywood of the East Coast horsey community...fruits, nuts, cults, and liberal behaviors included. Oh yes, and please let me dispell the idea that any event babes or event hotties are innocent. I don't know a single solitary one that doesn't have a one way ticket on the bus to hell. I'm driving, of course, but they all have tickets. A whole herd of eventings best, hottest, and brights coupled with a few too many drinks at the Palms in Lexington, VA some moons ago shattered my illusions that even the quietest, meekest eventers were innocent. I think I'll stop now, before I talk myself into trouble.

PolestarFarm
Jan. 17, 2008, 09:29 PM
I met a paraequestrian rider with no arms...

Keep 'em busy with other things, that's my advice!

Yeah, but if they are men, arent they already handicapped!

TKR
Jan. 17, 2008, 09:31 PM
I swear, if I could find the nerve I used to have, I'd take up eventing (again)! You folks sure know how to have a good time! Maybe if I took some lessons with Denny and he was very, very kind (!!), I could remember how much fun jumping can be! I keep thinking I'll breed one of my girls to Reputed Testamony, what a gorgeous guy he is!
PennyG

tecumsea
Jan. 17, 2008, 09:42 PM
OD 04 I want video of the OBS. from having to work many a sale, I have had the pleasure and often used it to my advantage of handling the spinning yearling with the auto rapid fire rear end.

May be we can revisit the inflatable crash vest and the drink, drop, and flip thread.

denny
Jan. 17, 2008, 09:55 PM
I`m probably going to see Will C. this next week, if he`s still at Michael and Natalie`s.
Do any of you have any messages for him?
(No slobbering on the note paper)

Gnep
Jan. 17, 2008, 10:15 PM
does Will standing for Willing
and C for can

?

2ndyrgal
Jan. 17, 2008, 10:20 PM
Denny, you can't rape the willing. And like olympicdreams, my husband's exposure to male riders has been males of a decidedly non-threatening variety. When I mentioned I might consider eventing for the '"big horse", he said "wasn't it at Rolex that the "old guy" chatted you up at the book signing?" "Those guys gallop and jump BIG, they must be straight right?" Then he watched some rather unfeminine gals dressage test and said "well, the guys are anyway, right?" Now, I wasn't sure if he considered the possibility of "rabid eventer gals" who, uhhhhh, like rabid eventer gals, a negative or a positive. Is 46 too old to be curious? About eventing I mean. I ride a pretty mean dressage test, have a horse that will jump anything and is sure footed and I've foxhunted behind a former MFH of considerable age and skill and was convinced that he was blazing a new trail and I was going to die if I followed him. I've done almost everything on your "list". No, not that list, the other one, where you jump something higher than your head. Before you get drunk and end up in a compromising position where your head isn't the highest point of elevation. Really, there are some things I haven't done on horseback yet, I'm thinking that eventing could cross several of them off the list. What do you think? Am I too old to cross train???

Kailesbailes
Jan. 17, 2008, 10:23 PM
Wow just wow. i haven't laughed that hard in a long time. this is a pretty damn funny thread going on here.

AlexMakowski
Jan. 17, 2008, 10:23 PM
Now you are paying it foward. I havnt laughed this hard all week, but the image of a person, let alone a woman in white, getting targeted by a fiesty youngster has be gasping for breath! I wish I could have been there. Maybe it will show up on youtube in a few days?

olympicdreams04
Jan. 17, 2008, 10:24 PM
Gnep...I think I just snorted Nutella. That CANNOT be good for my sinuses. Tec, if I had a video, I would be a youtube STAHR! Alas, I was laughing too hard to use the video phone in appropriate time. Still not as funny as this thread though. Denny, I think I have it! Michael and Nat are the masterminds behind creating a master event race of eventer hotties and babies to take over eventerland. I mean really...it seems every other day I hear of some new fine young eventer that have pulled into their cosy little farm. Little old me, OD04 was even there for a while! Back many moons ago, I attending an all-girls prep school with Nat...enough said there. Between living with Michael and Nat and living @ Bruce's place in Ocala, I have enough stories to begin authoring the bible of the new eventing master race. Oh yes, and enough good "riding" to remind me why there should be a universal USEA slogan that goes something like "If you haven't ridden an event(er)...you haven't really ridden at all!"

2ndyrgal
Jan. 17, 2008, 10:33 PM
You could use that slogan on t'shirts at Rolex this year and make a fortune. But hey, always use "protective gear" when riding and event(er). You know, if you can really get that master race of killer eventer babes going, then Denny's wish for competing in spandex could be realized yet. Please be careful in the breeding program however, while there are no limits to how far spandex does stretch, there are limits on how far it SHOULD. (I live in Kentucky now, trust me, much like duct tape, apparently spandex will hold in anything. It just isn't pretty.

olympicdreams04
Jan. 17, 2008, 10:37 PM
Oh 2ndy, we must go into business together. We can mass produce all sorts of garments...even the protective kind! And we can design our own line of spandex eventing unitards that are tight in all the right places for the fit and wellformed master race eventer!

Miss Perfect
Jan. 17, 2008, 11:00 PM
LOL olympicdreams04 - I just made your slogan my new signature. Too funny! :lol:

olympicdreams04
Jan. 17, 2008, 11:02 PM
Okay, we must start a new clique. I proclaim it that "Ride an event(er)" clique. Join in everyone join in. That means you too, Denny!

LexInVA
Jan. 17, 2008, 11:11 PM
Okay, we must start a new clique. I proclaim it that "Ride an event(er)" clique. Join in everyone join in. That means you too, Denny!

The famous asian guy sums up my thoughts on this quite nicely. (http://mwavs.com/0058536645/WAVS/TV_Shows/3rd_Rock_From_The_Sun/ohmy.wav)

Eventingjunkie
Jan. 17, 2008, 11:23 PM
Okay, we must start a new clique. I proclaim it that "Ride an event(er)" clique. Join in everyone join in. That means you too, Denny!

I'm game...just hope my 13 year old daughter doesn't decide to join...at least not for another 20 years.

Miss Perfect
Jan. 17, 2008, 11:31 PM
I love this quote from Badger:
". . . determined ... to see innocence quashed and life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness and finish lines enjoyed to the nth degree."
I want to add it to my signature line also, as it is pretty much my view of life, but I can't fit it all in. Boo!

See what you started Denny?

AngelEventer
Jan. 17, 2008, 11:33 PM
Re: Will Coleman...

I worked the warmup arena of a show that I was entered in, and met WC in person. And all I can say is, those pictures don't do him justice. Maybe if USEA featured HIM in a few commercials, we'd have a few more people interested in eventing!


haha - yeah. I first met him at Radnor in '04 (and get this - we had quite the aisle, Will F., AND Will C., in the SAME aisle) - he certainly kept us entertained. Not only are the 2 gorgeous, but rather hilarious as well. I vaugely remember some kind of chase involving Will C's "Banana Republic Loafers" and FART written on Will F's tack trunk... Maybe if we can get TEN "knuckle dragging" eventers together we can get the both of them cornered. :)

TBKate
Jan. 17, 2008, 11:47 PM
I would like to be the first to volunteer myself, body, mind, and soul, to the entrapment of the fine gentleman.:yes: Either of them. Or one of those "other ones" OlympicDreams mentioned *coughcough* ;)share and share alike, dear!!

I'm serious, girls. I'm ready to be part of a posse--and Denny, I was in a sorority not so long ago, so I can "pass" for a non knuckle-dragger--Wills beware!!!:winkgrin: I will lay down my life. Or rather, my self.

olympicdreams04
Jan. 17, 2008, 11:58 PM
Oh Kate my dearest, I will gladly share the phone numbers of any eventer hotties you are scouting out while NOT dragging your knuckles along and leaving tracks in the sand. Unfortunately though, being a NON knuckle dragger, I CAN'T do something like beat my chest and chuff loudly, long fangs bared and spurs...er...cocked, and defend any event hottie that I might ensnare, even though I would never do such a thing to begin with. Too bad.

Tootsie
Jan. 18, 2008, 01:41 AM
Somehow I am having trouble believing all of this. My main problem focuses on Denny's use of the word "captured" in the original post. Now my experiance with male eventers (even the innocent ones) has been that they need no help getting themselves into trouble. I doubt the girls had to do much at all. I mean, maybe they snapped the handcuffs in place but I'm sure the IMER already had his wrists in them already. Perhaps what they are really doing is playing into this IMER's fantasy. Perhaps they are being kind to tolerate him at all when they could easily just run him off the property and confiscate his nice horses. I think these girls are being much more benevolet than they need to be.

Picasso
Jan. 18, 2008, 08:03 AM
See, now this ruins everything. I have sworn up and down to Mr. 53, a.k.a. DH, that ALL men associated with horses play way, way, way on the other side of the fence, which he had accepted hook, line and sinker. This sort of information will ruin my deeply ingrained web of lies.

So thanks a lot for posting the pictures of the eye candy (YUMMERS!) and bringing up depraved proclivities, chained kidnappings, etc. Geez guys.

Now Mr. Picasso on the other hand is hoping (praying?) someone comes along in this horsie game and is smitten - so long as he is willing to pay to for the horses, Mr. Picasso says! (Just kidding, everyone!)

west5
Jan. 18, 2008, 08:25 AM
too funny

Those of you in the younger generations should not be so surprised by many of the more senior members comments.

This whole thread falls under something that I regularly say to my children:

I'm old but not dead!

MommaMare
Jan. 18, 2008, 08:31 AM
Haha! After ten years in the dressage world, I'm just now getting back into eventing and trying out hunting - you guys definitely have more fun; I've seen the error of my dressage-y ways and returned to the "dark side!" Can't help you gals out, though... I'm a married woman...

DancingPretense
Jan. 18, 2008, 09:08 AM
I would join the posse to capture the Will F and Will C's of eventing, with them as a carrot at the end of my line I can only imagine how productive my working students would be! I on the other hand would be a little distracted :D

fooler
Jan. 18, 2008, 11:22 AM
And if this whole kidnapping thing is part of an eventing conspiracy designed to let them (rabid event chicks) win, then Jimmy and Mike and I are glad we rode back when eventing was safe for clean cut American youth.


Now that is the best laugh of all - The three sweet innocent babes . . . HA!

eqsiu
Jan. 18, 2008, 11:51 AM
Those of you in the younger generations should not be so surprised by many of the more senior members comments.



It only shocks when it comes from your parents. *shudders**gags*

Not when from an older generation in general!

horse_on_course
Jan. 18, 2008, 02:02 PM
This sounds like fun! I'll definately help out! ::innocently bats eyes::

minniemoore
Jan. 18, 2008, 02:07 PM
I'd be happy to join the possee...been looking for a Mrs. Robinson role :cool:

This thread makes me laugh out loud...too cool.

justhanginon
Jan. 18, 2008, 02:23 PM
So do you think Will C gives riding lessons ?

LexInVA
Jan. 18, 2008, 02:26 PM
So do you think Will C gives riding lessons ?

Most likely private equitation lessons with an emphasis on dressage riding. :eek:

justhanginon
Jan. 18, 2008, 02:32 PM
Well, I really wouldn't want a group. ;)

LexInVA
Jan. 18, 2008, 02:45 PM
Well, I really wouldn't want a group. ;)

He looks like the kind of guy who prefers pairs over singles though I'm sure he would would be open to doing one-on-one sessions if you....asked nicely.

justhanginon
Jan. 18, 2008, 02:50 PM
Don't most men prefer pairs over singles ? Of course, pairs of non knuckle draggers for him, I'm sure.

LexInVA
Jan. 18, 2008, 03:02 PM
Don't most men prefer pairs over singles ? Of course, pairs of non knuckle draggers for him, I'm sure.

That's just something we say. It's some ancient tradition that is lost somewhere in the missing pages of the Man Bible. Rumor has it they are stored under the Vatican in a vault next to the Papal collection of classic euro porn. One is enough for me though I can't complain if I'm surrounded by more than one as long as they aren't of the hostile variety. :D I've met some very attractive "Knuckle Draggers" around here who put the regular gals to shame.

purplnurpl
Jan. 18, 2008, 03:12 PM
Forget the young innocent ones. The older ones are far more interesting and easier to get along with!



don't forget that they also have more ride time.

They are well schooled....

eqsiu
Jan. 18, 2008, 03:14 PM
don't forget that they also have more ride time.

They are well schooled....

Sometimes you have to correct faulty training though...

Prospects have their advantages!

LexInVA
Jan. 18, 2008, 03:15 PM
Sometimes you have to correct faulty training though...

Prospects have their advantages!

We are eager to please and we aren't set in our ways yet. :winkgrin:

purplnurpl
Jan. 18, 2008, 03:16 PM
Okay, we must start a new clique. I proclaim it that "Ride an event(er)" clique. Join in everyone join in. That means you too, Denny!

wait, are we talking about event horses or event riders?

purplnurpl
Jan. 18, 2008, 03:19 PM
Please post an application and picture.
Thanks.

Signature at the bottom indicates that you are aware of possible dangers, have no hay allergies, and agree to use of handcuffs.

eqsiu
Jan. 18, 2008, 03:26 PM
We are eager to please and we aren't set in our ways yet. :winkgrin:

Any chance you'll be LexInIL soon? Hm?

eqsiu
Jan. 18, 2008, 03:28 PM
wait, are we talking about event horses or event riders?

Ooo! I think both. :yes: Or if not, it should be!

<off to find an event rider to ride>

RAyers
Jan. 19, 2008, 01:04 AM
I find that being well schooled gets the best ride. It is not the size of the horse but how well you ride wins.

Reed

oskaar
Jan. 19, 2008, 01:26 AM
Dear LORD he looks good. Seems like just yesterday he was bumbly and gawky and 15.

For you ladies (and gents) on the West Coast, feast on this:

http://www.troutstreaming.com/gallery/1952552/1/84425344#84425344

I think DK would also be up for some private lessons.

TB or not TB?
Jan. 19, 2008, 03:52 AM
And here I thought this thread was about some sort of animal rights protest...

My poor, virgin ears! :uhoh:

justhanginon
Jan. 19, 2008, 10:47 AM
TB - Remember this is the Eventing thread. I didn't think anyone had "virgin ears" over here.;)

Kcisawesome
Jan. 19, 2008, 12:51 PM
Well, I was innocent...And then I read this thread...:lol:

olympicdreams04
Jan. 19, 2008, 04:02 PM
wait, are we talking about event horses or event riders?
Purp,
I sort of made the assumption that, this being the eventing forum and all, we all rode event HORSES to begin with. When I say "Ride an event(er)" I mean the two legged variety! :cool:

eventer_mi
Jan. 19, 2008, 05:20 PM
For you ladies (and gents) on the West Coast, feast on this:

http://www.troutstreaming.com/gallery/1952552/1/84425344#84425344

I think DK would also be up for some private lessons.

As Rachel Ray would say, "YUMMY!"

Between WC and DK, my poor husband is wondering why I'm drooling and slobbering all over the computer keyboard.

Miss Perfect
Jan. 19, 2008, 07:40 PM
I find that being well schooled gets the best ride. It is not the size of the horse but how well you ride wins.

Reed

LOL! Very true that size dosn't matter, but the quality of the ride does! :winkgrin:

As far as experience goes, I definately like a ride that knows how to take me to the finish line without me doing ALL the work. With the youngsters though, the occasional unexpected buck, swerve, dive and spin can provide such a rush that the finish line doesn't matter! :D

snoopy
Jan. 19, 2008, 07:43 PM
Filth I tell you, FILTH!!! To treat men as objects....Shame.

Out with Satan!!!!


But I do have a stall with Will's name on it;):D

Gnep
Jan. 19, 2008, 11:02 PM
8 seconds

Snapdragon
Jan. 19, 2008, 11:16 PM
Gnep, if you're riding a bronc, good on ya!

If not, so sorry!!!!

TB or not TB?
Jan. 20, 2008, 12:13 AM
TB - Remember this is the Eventing thread. I didn't think anyone had "virgin ears" over here.;)

That's true. Eventers wrap their legs around almost anything these days.... :D

2ndyrgal
Jan. 21, 2008, 06:11 PM
Though it's true some will ride anything, those of us who are old school prefer "Thoroughbreds". If I'm riding, I want to be riding something with no bottom and lots of heart.

purplnurpl
Jan. 21, 2008, 09:47 PM
8 seconds

Gnep, if you fall off can you get up and try again?

Gnep has the right idea though in terms of eventing...
Old format was more of a marathon.
Quick warm up (steeplechase) before the real deal!

LexInVA
Jan. 21, 2008, 10:40 PM
Gnep, if you fall off can you get up and try again?

Gnep has the right idea though in terms of eventing...
Old format was more of a marathon.
Quick warm up (steeplechase) before the real deal!

My mind is translating this into something else. :eek:

eqsiu
Jan. 22, 2008, 10:39 AM
My mind is translating this into something else. :eek:

Which works just fine if you warm up a bit more in the middle...;)

olympicdreams04
Jan. 22, 2008, 02:39 PM
Oh geez, I've been without internet for a couple of days and have missed having a good laugh. Miss Perfect SO has the right idea. "Size dosn't matter (much), but the quality of the ride does!(!!!!!)" And with the youngsters, it's not just the "under saddle" antics you have to worry about, but the bad ground manners as well. The colts can often be very mouth and inclined to bite or paw without warning. Gnep, 8 seconds better be how long it takes to get clothing removed. Anything else that takes 8 seconds is a very unfortunate waste of time. I am personally a long format devotee to the core. All of this short format, wham bam you're done, no long gallops to speak of just DOES NOT do it for me at all. In the end though, long or short, big or little, thoroughbred or rough stock, riding an event(er) is hands...and feet down better than any other "dicipline".

sycee
Jan. 22, 2008, 03:15 PM
LOL... I wandered over from the HJ area and this thread makes me think maybe I should start eventing!

TB or not TB?
Jan. 22, 2008, 05:55 PM
Though it's true some will ride anything, those of us who are old school prefer "Thoroughbreds". If I'm riding, I want to be riding something with no bottom and lots of heart.

Now now, let's not diminish the importance of a quality hind end. :D

Plus, a good engine is imperative. You don't want to have your mount quit on you just halfway through the course!

flyingtails
Jan. 22, 2008, 06:09 PM
Hey, it`s cold rain, there`s nothing going on,and so when I read that a horse has been kidnapped by Canadians, I just felt it was my civic duty to warn young male eventers that their very freedom may be in peril as well, because of a similar kidnapping ring being run by event girls, who, as we all know, will stop at nothing in their quest for gold, fame and glory, including incapacitating the competition.
Soon, I suspect, Will C, and others like him won`t walk onto the grounds of an event without armed guards.
Then, if this perilous slide continues, can we doubt that before long the only males we see at events will be on leashes?

Pardon my ignorance, but between school work and horses I can not keep up with the BN in eventing. Who is Will C?

LexInVA
Jan. 22, 2008, 06:11 PM
Now now, let's not diminish the importance of a quality hind end. :D

Plus, a good engine is imperative. You don't want to have your mount quit on you just halfway through the course!

By the same token, you don't want a rider who is going to overwork the mount. Breaking for recovery when needed is important to maintain the energy level otherwise the mount will run out of energy. ;)

bornfreenowexpensive
Jan. 22, 2008, 06:12 PM
Now now, let's not diminish the importance of a quality hind end. :D

Plus, a good engine is imperative. You don't want to have your mount quit on you just halfway through the course!


Hmmm...I took the no bottom remark as meaning no end to their energy and endurance. But I agree...the hind end can be as important as the front end. But perhaps my age is catching up with me....I do think that good brains are worth something as well.;)

We want the complete package here! Afterall, eventers need to be well rounded!

eqsiu
Jan. 22, 2008, 07:14 PM
Pardon my ignorance, but between school work and horses I can not keep up with the BN in eventing. Who is Will C?

Will Coleman- see pics posted previously.

eqsiu
Jan. 22, 2008, 07:19 PM
I have a preference for quick recovery times. It's okay if your mount can't complete the Tevis cup (in fact, it's preferable- long rides result in chafing :eek:), but if exercise leaves them winded for days...:no:

WNT
Jan. 22, 2008, 07:30 PM
Where'd that posse sign-up get to... :D

TB or not TB?
Jan. 22, 2008, 07:33 PM
By the same token, you don't want a rider who is going to overwork the mount. Breaking for recovery when needed is important to maintain the energy level otherwise the mount will run out of energy. ;)

Nonsense. That, my friends, is why I ride Thoroughbreds. :winkgrin:


Hmmm...I took the no bottom remark as meaning no end to their energy and endurance. But I agree...the hind end can be as important as the front end. But perhaps my age is catching up with me....I do think that good brains are worth something as well.;)

We want the complete package here! Afterall, eventers need to be well rounded!

Hehehe, I got that part of it, I just felt like being punny and putting a twist on it. I have a mind in the gutter, I know. Like yours all aren't there. :lol:

2ndyrgal
Jan. 22, 2008, 08:01 PM
Event riding is alot like good sex. At least one of the pair should have some experience. Oftentimes, it doesn't matter which of the pair is the more experienced, as the less experienced can rise to the occasion. Play at the same level as it were. And I didn't say no hindquarters, I said no bottom. Remember, you do incur penalties for finishing too much under the time allowed. And it's far better to have a good round and go a bit over on the time.

bornfreenowexpensive
Jan. 22, 2008, 08:44 PM
Hehehe, I got that part of it, I just felt like being punny and putting a twist on it. I have a mind in the gutter, I know. Like yours all aren't there. :lol:


It is hardly ever out of the gutter.;)

I do agree with 2ndyrgal......In addition, gagets can have their place when used with experienced hands....but short cuts will rarely get you the best rewards.

TB or not TB?
Jan. 22, 2008, 09:19 PM
It is hardly ever out of the gutter.;)

I do agree with 2ndyrgal......In addition, gagets can have their place when used with experienced hands....but short cuts will rarely get you the best rewards.

Well played! :lol: It's not surprising that spurs are *required* for the higher levels, eh?

olympicdreams04
Jan. 22, 2008, 09:52 PM
You know, beyond breeding and conformation, personality is really what sells me on a potential "ride". If they have that "look of eagles" (in preferably blue eyes), I'm atleast interested. If they lead and tie well, that is also a plus. If they stand to be scre...or rather shod, then I'm really just about sold. The final key point: reckless abandon. Even if they are of the sort that might flip on you, if you give them the right ride it's worth the risk.

Miss Perfect
Jan. 22, 2008, 10:50 PM
Even if they are of the sort that might flip on you, if you give them the right ride it's worth the risk.

LOL - I LOVE it when they flip on you!!! It is also very important that they stand and don't kick out while getting a good "cleaning". :eek:

tecumsea
Jan. 23, 2008, 12:00 PM
As much as our "rides" are well rounded, the maintenance and soundness should be addressed.

any suggestions for the maintenance issue, not just nutrition, butt.....

purplnurpl
Jan. 23, 2008, 12:10 PM
Cytle M, monthly adaquan, a high NSC% diet, and for our well schooled eventers maybe a dose of sildenafil citrate. Please pay close attention to proper dosage according to body weight.
Too much of this good stuff and you may be forced to ride out a runaway. If accidental overdose does result in a runaway the pulley rein is advised to help regain control of your mount followed by a short rest period. Following the rest period please consult your vet for future dosage.

justhanginon
Jan. 23, 2008, 12:59 PM
Oh, and let's not forget about flexibility. You want that mount to be flexible and athletic enough to adjust in mid air.

seeuatx
Jan. 23, 2008, 01:12 PM
And if our solid campaigners seem to become dull or develop a few bad habits, sometime schooling with gymnastic exercises will surely sharpen their....skills ;)

justhanginon
Jan. 23, 2008, 01:14 PM
Soemtimes just carrying a good dressage whip or crop will keep them from developing those bad habits.

Eventingjunkie
Jan. 23, 2008, 01:32 PM
Do you think our older ****mounts will mind being passed down to the novice riders to teach them a thing or two?

eqsiu
Jan. 23, 2008, 01:33 PM
Just make sure you get a vet check. By the time they're at the **** level they've been ridden hard and may have some health issues.

purplnurpl
Jan. 23, 2008, 02:06 PM
Just make sure you get a vet check. By the time they're at the **** level they've been ridden hard and may have some health issues.

They may have some heath issues needing maintenance but the pros defiantly outweigh the cons.
Don't be afraid of a physical glitch here and there. A thoughtfull warm up and supplements usually keep them well oiled and help improve blood circulation.
These mounts are worth their weight in gold because over the years they will have picked up some tricks of the trade and extra skills that will benefit new up and comers (no pun intended). Some riders need a good schooled eventer to show them the ropes.

RAyers
Jan. 23, 2008, 02:46 PM
How can one compare a good **** ride to another? I am sure it is a matter of perspective. One person may find it a bit too much while to another the fit is perfect?

I agree and older mount will need good care to maintain their athletic level. However, don't write off an Advanced mount as a possiblity if you are still working your way up the levels.

This is another example of being sure that the ride fits appropriately so that you are niether over- or undermounted for your discipline. From the upper level perspective, the key is to recognize the personality of your ride. Some like to be controlled while others will take offense. Don't assume that just because you are a good rider that the mount will automatically adjust to your style. Initially, many times you need to be the one to make adjustments to get the ride you want.

Reed

olympicdreams04
Jan. 23, 2008, 02:54 PM
Another point that needs to be brought up: safety! As I am sure you have all heard, the big topic at the convention this year was safety. It seems that in the divisions composed of inexperienced riders, these riders often start off with WAY too much enthusiasm, scale WAY back, and then charge forward again with dangerous abandon. The name of the game should be tempo, with a more or less consistant pace throughout. It's gonna hurt if you catch a knee, so to speak...wink wink.

purplnurpl
Jan. 23, 2008, 03:14 PM
As event riders we also need to be aware of not only style of riding [mentioned above] but the discipline at hand. snicker, snork.
There are certain movements/positions in dressage, especially at Intermediate and above, that cannot be properly initiated or maintained without correct knowledge and use of the 'spiral seat'.
Please see Anatomy of Dressage

I cannot speak for the male gender. But as a Dressage Queen I would think that sometimes...
"It's good to be the King".

bornfreenowexpensive
Jan. 23, 2008, 03:17 PM
Another point that needs to be brought up: safety!


Hmmm....which is safer? The more experienced mount or the younger mount? Suppose it all depends on the riders!:)

eqsiu
Jan. 23, 2008, 03:22 PM
They may have some heath issues needing maintenance but the pros defiantly outweigh the cons.
Don't be afraid of a physical glitch here and there. A thoughtfull warm up and supplements usually keep them well oiled and help improve blood circulation.
These mounts are worth their weight in gold because over the years they will have picked up some tricks of the trade and extra skills that will benefit new up and comers (no pun intended). Some riders need a good schooled eventer to show them the ropes.

Lol I was thinking of the diseases that can be contracted when one competes frequently.

TexasTB
Jan. 23, 2008, 03:25 PM
(Equine) Herpes Virus

LexInVA
Jan. 23, 2008, 03:47 PM
(Equine) Herpes Virus

Let's not forget about the Equestrian Herpes Virus. That's one the h/j people are going to have to acknowledge sooner or later. :winkgrin:

Eventingjunkie
Jan. 23, 2008, 04:10 PM
They may have some heath issues needing maintenance but the pros defiantly outweigh the cons.
Don't be afraid of a physical glitch here and there. A thoughtfull warm up and supplements usually keep them well oiled and help improve blood circulation.
These mounts are worth their weight in gold because over the years they will have picked up some tricks of the trade and extra skills that will benefit new up and comers (no pun intended). Some riders need a good schooled eventer to show them the ropes.

Do you know of any good deals on some older experienced imports? Maybe from Australia or New Zealand? I hear they have "good" eventing stock over there. Something about the minerals in the soil?

purplnurpl
Jan. 23, 2008, 04:13 PM
don't discount the Irish/English/Euopean Imports.
They have deep heart girth and good bone.


geez, I never realized Eventing was such a dirty sport.

eqsiu
Jan. 23, 2008, 04:14 PM
geez, I never realized Eventing was such a dirty sport.

Texas must be isolated.

LexInVA
Jan. 23, 2008, 04:17 PM
Texas must be isolated.

Are we considering the "nuckular" option as Dubya would put it?

eqsiu
Jan. 23, 2008, 05:42 PM
Are we considering the "nuckular" option as Dubya would put it?

GAH!!! That drives me nuts!

And really, where else but a barn can a 13 year old learn numerous dirty ditties involving animals? I even remember a few...

LexInVA
Jan. 23, 2008, 05:54 PM
GAH!!! That drives me nuts!

And really, where else but a barn can a 13 year old learn numerous dirty ditties involving animals? I even remember a few...

You don't even want to know what's come out of the 4H programs...:eek: