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War Admiral
Nov. 14, 2007, 02:27 PM
I didn't want to post this until the news was officially out. Kristin Webber, local dressage trainer at High Point Farms, was killed yesterday in a riding accident.

Memorial service at High Point tonight at 5:00 p.m.

Deepest condolences to the family and friends of this talented young lady, who was scheduled to be married in two weeks. :cry:

Link to news article (http://onlineathens.com/stories/111407/news_death.shtml).

eventerwannabe
Nov. 14, 2007, 02:32 PM
OMG how incredibly sad. My condolences to her family and friends.

monstrpony
Nov. 14, 2007, 02:37 PM
So sad. Condolences to all of her people and critters.

EdwynEdwyn
Nov. 14, 2007, 02:39 PM
Oh no! So sad. :(

tbtula
Nov. 14, 2007, 02:42 PM
OMG. All I can offer is condolences at this time..

AKB
Nov. 14, 2007, 02:44 PM
Does anyone know what happened? Was she wearing a helmet?

War Admiral
Nov. 14, 2007, 02:48 PM
I don't ride at High Point & I only know what I was told, which was from someone several degrees removed. I'm not real comfortable with hearsay on that particular point. It's sad enough. I choose to remember her as a talented young rider who was great with green horses, and contributed a great deal to the local equestrian community. :(

dray
Nov. 14, 2007, 03:09 PM
My prayers for the comfort of those left behind.

hitchinmygetalong
Nov. 14, 2007, 03:09 PM
Please don't start a helmet argument. It's pointless and painful and totally inappropriate.

What a heartbreaking tragedy for her family and friends. My condolences.

STF
Nov. 14, 2007, 03:12 PM
I am very sorry to hear this. I met this girl once while horse shopping. She was young, but a class act and very professional. Its a true loss to the horse comminity.
My condolences.

TwoArabs
Nov. 14, 2007, 03:13 PM
Very, very sad. My condolences to everyone who cared about her.

ESG
Nov. 14, 2007, 03:13 PM
OMGiH - her poor family! What a terrible thing. I'm so very sorry. :cry:

slc2
Nov. 14, 2007, 03:13 PM
It's terrible. What a loss to everyone involved. Condolences to her family and friends, and all at High Point.

kellyb
Nov. 14, 2007, 03:13 PM
:(:(:(:(:(:(

JSwan
Nov. 14, 2007, 03:19 PM
My condolences to her family and friends... and to her fiance.

horsepix76
Nov. 14, 2007, 03:36 PM
That is simply awful. My condolences to her family and fiance. :no:

CTM
Nov. 14, 2007, 03:55 PM
I knew her - we hung out at shows and she stayed at my house once during a clinic. She was one of the nicest, most darling people you would ever meet. She will be greatly missed.

lovemyrobin
Nov. 14, 2007, 04:19 PM
http://goodhorseman.org/news.html

How sad

It just makes me think about the dangers of this sport.

Coreene
Nov. 14, 2007, 04:32 PM
How awful. What a tragic loss, and how devastating for those she left behind. :cry:

Ambrey
Nov. 14, 2007, 04:43 PM
That is so sad, she was so young :(

Appaloosa1224
Nov. 14, 2007, 04:48 PM
Its really sad. The barn I board at is 1 mile down the road from High Point. I knew something wasn't right when I dove by there yesterday. Today the flag was at half mast. I couldn't quite bring myself to go out at 5 today. It still hasn't quite sunk in i guess. She was always so helpful and I know she was a long time student of my trainer as well. I just can't believe it. She was such a wonderful person.

SillyHorse
Nov. 14, 2007, 05:18 PM
It's very sad to hear about this. However, I don't think it's inappropriate to ask whether she was wearing a helmet. If she wasn't, maybe ONE person will make the change to wearing a helmet and eliminate the possibility of family and friends facing this kind of tragedy.

At1Dressage85
Nov. 14, 2007, 05:25 PM
So sad to hear this. My deepest sympathies lie with her friends, family, and fiance.

Appaloosa1224
Nov. 14, 2007, 05:25 PM
I don't know if she was wearing a helmet, but I do know her injuries were severe skull injuries

MagicRoseFarm
Nov. 14, 2007, 05:33 PM
It's always very sad to lose a member of the horse community this way. My condolences to her family and friends.

DressageGeek "Ribbon Ho"
Nov. 14, 2007, 05:36 PM
so, so sorry.

Amber_M
Nov. 14, 2007, 05:49 PM
Just looked at the website... what a beautiful girl, and a beautiful rider!

I hope her family and friends can take comfort in the fact that she went doing something she loved, which is what I'm sure all of us would want if it was us.

Deepest sympathies for all of you who knew her. I can't imagine what her barn must be going through, esp her lesson kids :(

strawberry roan
Nov. 14, 2007, 08:33 PM
My condolences. Very, very sad.

Velvet
Nov. 14, 2007, 09:29 PM
My sympathies to her family and friends.

(And for those saying whether or not someone was wearing a helmet is an appropriate discussion, shame on you. Now is not the time for guessing about or discussing this issue. Now is the time for the family and friends to grieve and remember the person she was and the hopes they had for her future. Since the accident said the horse fell down, it's like saying, "Gee, my loved one died in an accident where the car was wrecked so badly even the jaws of life couldn't get through the twisted metal. Huh, I wonder if they were wearing a seatbelt or if the car had airbags. Wouldn't it make a great message to make sure others would buy new cars with airbags, or remember to wear seatbelts?" :rolleyes: You need to see it through the eyes of those who are grieving the loss--not through your own agenda.)

(Yes, I'm sounding harsh, but it's truly unfeeling, uncaring, and lacking in compassion and mercy to say such things at a time like this. Save it for a much later date--and ask the family if they want you to use it to help other people IF your guesses are true.)

Zevida
Nov. 14, 2007, 10:04 PM
Velvet: There are lots of cases where both rider and horse fall and rider walks away unscathed. That is hardly a comparison to being pulled from a car with the jaws of life. This is an internet message board and discussions go will they will go. I think the question of helmet, especially considering severe scull injuries and that many dressage riders think they don't need a helmet, is a valid question.

Sincere condolences to family and friends. A tragedy is a tragedy, no matter how or what happened.

dutchmike
Nov. 14, 2007, 10:13 PM
wtf cares if it was with or without a helmet it is still a tragedy. My condolences for the family.

perpetual_novice
Nov. 14, 2007, 10:18 PM
Velvet: There are lots of cases where both rider and horse fall and rider walks away unscathed. That is hardly a comparison to being pulled from a car with the jaws of life. This is an internet message board and discussions go will they will go. I think the question of helmet, especially considering severe scull injuries and that many dressage riders think they don't need a helmet, is a valid question.
But now is not the time to be asking this!!!
Sincere condolences to family and friends. A tragedy is a tragedy, no matter how or what happened.

Condolences to her family, friends and colleagues

veebug22
Nov. 14, 2007, 10:26 PM
Her poor family. My heart goes out to her fiance. How devastating :no:

MEP
Nov. 14, 2007, 10:32 PM
What a terrible tragedy.

Reynard Ridge
Nov. 15, 2007, 04:59 AM
Condolences to her family and friends.

Louise
Nov. 15, 2007, 06:27 AM
My most sincere condolences to all who knew and loved her.

Kimberlee
Nov. 15, 2007, 09:55 AM
My deepest condolences to her friends and family.

And, yes, it is easy to ask if she was wearing a helmet. How many people hear that someone was in a crash, and if that person was known to drink, ask if the person was drunk at the time of an accident. Then go out and tell everyone that you shouldn't drink and drive. Doesn't it make it even more of a tragic accident if the extent of her injuries could have been limited through a very simple act?

Again, I will be keeping her family in my prayers.

canyonoak
Nov. 15, 2007, 10:08 AM
Condolences to family and friends. Just from the photo, it is obvious a bright light is no longer shining.

I will light a candle in her memory, and remember once again that life is a gift.

Terrie
Nov. 15, 2007, 10:14 AM
My condolences go out to her friends and family. 2 weeks away from her wedding? Ugh, that makes it even more sad.

merrygoround
Nov. 15, 2007, 10:38 AM
It's very sad to hear about this. However, I don't think it's inappropriate to ask whether she was wearing a helmet. If she wasn't, maybe ONE person will make the change to wearing a helmet and eliminate the possibility of family and friends facing this kind of tragedy.

I agree, but that doesn't indicate that I do not send my sympathies to her friends, family and fiancee.

At Liberty
Nov. 15, 2007, 11:41 AM
So sad to hear this, my sympathies to her family and friends. :cry:

mroades
Nov. 15, 2007, 08:36 PM
I have a student that boards at High Point. This is what she sent me yesterday.
I sent this to my barn owner, because she will not wear a helmet. I adore her and do not want her family to suffer like Kristins'.

Hugs and prayers to all involved.



"Last night a friend of mine from the barn died. She was riding a
young horse yesterday morning without a helmet and the horse spooked
and she fell off and hit the back of her head on the ground. They
rushed her to the hospital and did emergency brain surgery, but they
couldn't get her brain to stop swelling. She died yesterday at 4P. I
spent a couple hours at the hospital with her family and people from
the barn. She was 25, just recently engaged and had 3 amazing
siblings. Everyone will miss her. Please keep her family in your
prayers."

skykingismybaby1
Nov. 15, 2007, 08:56 PM
That is so sad. I am glad that she was doing what she loved when she died.

JSwan
Nov. 15, 2007, 09:02 PM
It's very sad to hear about this. However, I don't think it's inappropriate to ask whether she was wearing a helmet. If she wasn't, maybe ONE person will make the change to wearing a helmet and eliminate the possibility of family and friends facing this kind of tragedy.


Please don't think a helmet is going to eliminate the possibility of a tragedy. Many people suffer horrific injuries while wearing equipment designed to protect them. Including helmets.

I'm not sure the family and friends really want do gooders tsk tsking about how their loved one would not have been hurt had she been wearing a helmet. "Shoulda coulda woulda" statements are never appreciated by those grieving over the loss of a loved one.

cottagefarm
Nov. 15, 2007, 09:05 PM
How terribly sad for everyone involved.

I would like to ask another question but think it would be more appropriate in a few days whn everyone has said their goodbyes.

Sally

Utah
Nov. 15, 2007, 09:13 PM
What a beautiful young woman...

mroades
Nov. 15, 2007, 09:20 PM
I am not tsk tsk-ing. I am hoping more folks will put that helmet on. They do prevent and lesson the severity of head injuries! I KNOW that they do not prevent all injuries, I had a child die on a trail ride when her horse fell on her, crushing her chest, her helmet could do nothing for that.

My barn owner rides dressage....and therefore thinks she doesnt need a helmet. I wanted her and whoever else to see that head injuries are not always related to jumping,etc.

My student is devastated and was close to this young woman. I am sure she would have wanted to leave a legacy of helping others!

JSwan
Nov. 16, 2007, 07:40 AM
I am not tsk tsk-ing. I am hoping more folks will put that helmet on. They do prevent and lesson the severity of head injuries! I KNOW that they do not prevent all injuries, I had a child die on a trail ride when her horse fell on her, crushing her chest, her helmet could do nothing for that.

My barn owner rides dressage....and therefore thinks she doesnt need a helmet. I wanted her and whoever else to see that head injuries are not always related to jumping,etc.

My student is devastated and was close to this young woman. I am sure she would have wanted to leave a legacy of helping others!

mroades - sorry - I was responding to SillyHorse, not you. I apologize for any confusion.

SillyHorse
Nov. 16, 2007, 09:09 AM
Please don't think a helmet is going to eliminate the possibility of a tragedy. Many people suffer horrific injuries while wearing equipment designed to protect them. Including helmets.

I'm not sure the family and friends really want do gooders tsk tsking about how their loved one would not have been hurt had she been wearing a helmet. "Shoulda coulda woulda" statements are never appreciated by those grieving over the loss of a loved one.
I wasn't "tsk tsking," and there was no shoulda woulda coulda in my comment. In fact, when I wrote my comment I didn't know whether this girl was wearing a helmet. Do you honestly believe that wearing a helmet doesn't significantly reduce your chances of sustaining a serious head injury?

I did not and do not wish this to turn into another helmet arguement. But now we know the young woman in question was not wearing a helmet and died as a result of a head injury. Maybe, just maybe, one or two people who read about it will decide they don't want their familes and friends to suffer like this girl's family and friends are suffering, and will put on a helmet.

KimPeterson
Nov. 16, 2007, 09:14 AM
I am so sorry for her family. I have spoken to her before on the phone, very nice person and talented rider. I couldn't help to think how easily the same thing could have happened to me with all the spills I have taken both with and without a helmet, you can't prevent something like this unfortunately getting injured is pure chance. God Bless her family and my heart breaks for them & her fiance.

Huntertwo
Nov. 16, 2007, 09:19 AM
How horribly sad.. So young, engaged, and just starting a new chapter in her life. :cry:

JSwan
Nov. 16, 2007, 09:42 AM
Do you honestly believe that wearing a helmet doesn't significantly reduce your chances of sustaining a serious head injury?


You wrote, "eliminate the possibility". The very sad truth is that helmets will not reduce the chance of serious head injury. They only reduce/mitigate minor head injuries.

Nothing can eliminate the chance of any of us getting seriously hurt - no matter how much safety equipment we wear.

I have had a friend suffer a terrible head injury - while wearing a helmet - and the folks who started going on about the helmet thing were setting themselves up for a punch in the nose.

Tragedy's are bad enough for family and friends without having to deal with that sort of crap. Leave it.

ReSomething
Nov. 16, 2007, 09:58 AM
I'd like to express my sympathy to all those who knew this young lady.

mr_miamis_mom
Nov. 16, 2007, 09:59 AM
Not to hop on and start the millionth helemt debate but, when I hear someone died in a car accident the first thing that crosses my mind is "I wonder if they were wearing their seatbelt?". When I hear someone died in a riding accident as a result of major head trauma, I ask myself "I wonder if they were wearing a helmet?".

I don't think it shoud be considered out of line to wonder if someone was wearing either. Seatbelts can save lives and so can helmets.

I am very saddened to hear of this young person's passing. It seems she was quite talented and had a bright future ahead of her. My condolences to her fiance, friends, family and coworkers.

SillyHorse
Nov. 16, 2007, 10:47 AM
Tragedy's are bad enough for family and friends without having to deal with that sort of crap. Leave it.

Tragedies are indeed bad for families and friends.

Maybe you should write to the USEF and tell them that their rules for protective headgear are crap. I'm sure they'll enjoy hearing from you.

JSwan
Nov. 16, 2007, 10:53 AM
Tragedies are indeed bad for families and friends.

Maybe you should write to the USEF and tell them that their rules for protective headgear are crap. I'm sure they'll enjoy hearing from you.

Good Lord - don't be an idiot and an ass about it. The rules aren't freaking crap and you know I never implied they were, nor did I imply helmets were in any way ridiculous or inappropriate.

How you managed to infer that is amazing. Don't make the assumption that just because I didn't agree with your assertion that helmets ELIMINATE the possibility of injury, means I think they have no value.

I took exception to your post. Not protective helmets.

Figure it out.:rolleyes:

My2cents
Nov. 16, 2007, 10:54 AM
It is a tragedy plain and simple. I too have that knee jerk thought when I hear about riding accidents. No, it isn't the time or place to start a helmet debate but if hearing about the circumstances of this terrible tragedy helps someone in making a decision as far as helmet wearing, then so be it. Condolences to her family and friends.

Velvet
Nov. 16, 2007, 11:43 AM
Man, a person can't even die without all the DQ-wannabes quarter backing it out here. :rolleyes:

This is a very tragic situation. The family is grieving. I only hope that NONE of them come out here and see this thread.

I think this is just another sign of how far this board has sunk into the morass that is typical internet fare. :no:

beameup
Nov. 16, 2007, 11:50 AM
what a tragedy to lose someone so young. my deepest condolences to her family and friends.

Tiempo
Nov. 16, 2007, 11:55 AM
My heart aches for her loved ones.

What a terrible loss of a beautiful young woman.

grayarabpony
Nov. 16, 2007, 11:57 AM
My sincerest condolences to her family and friends.

sm
Nov. 16, 2007, 12:41 PM
My condolences as well, family and loved ones are in my prayers.

Daydream Believer
Nov. 16, 2007, 12:55 PM
My condolences to the family on their terrible loss.

DownYonder
Nov. 16, 2007, 01:20 PM
This is just terrible. My deep condolences to her family and friends.

LE
Nov. 16, 2007, 01:21 PM
:( Only 22! How heartbreaking! My deepest condolences for the family!!!!

cyberbay
Nov. 16, 2007, 01:44 PM
I think what might be driving the need of some posters to wonder aloud if Kristin was wearing a helmet at the time of the accident comes more from the fact that many of us very dearly recognize how dangerous this sport of riding can become at any moment.

I don't think anyone here, if they really examined their motives for wanting to know, wants to tsk tsk anyone for getting hurt. I think the more experienced among us know that no one is immune from injury, in life in general or specifically around the horses.

But, it is very human to want to put order to or be able to explain something so devastating, that someone could be injured badly or killed when working/riding horses, because we all recognize, whether we want to face it or not, that that person could have been us. Because we all work/ride horses. And if we can find a way to minimize the randomness of these events, because we all know that "it" could strike us at any moment, many of us will do that. Either obviously, such as posting to this thread, or more subconsciously.

So, whenever we hear about such an accident, which could have happened to any of us as much as it happened to Kristin, I think it's very natural to want to know the surrounding circumstances. It's human to want to be able NOT to feel powerless in the face of such incidences. I'm sure some people say it's not appropriate or it's tactless to ask such questions so close to the incident, but that's for another thread, I guess.

rabicon
Nov. 16, 2007, 01:51 PM
This is a tragic accident and my deepest sympathy goes out to her family and friends. I feel so horrible for the students of hers and hate to think of what they are going thru right now. I just hope none of them were there to witness this accident. I heard the horse flipped over on her but this could be wrong. I won't quote my source but this was my understanding. The helmet issue is not right for this thread and should have been handled differently in another thread. I say drop it in this thread give you sympathy if you would like and your prayers but drop the helmet issue. Things happen for no reason sometimes and if it was her time to go she would go with or without the helmet a helmet does not make the rules for when its your time to leave this world. My prayers go out to all that knew her!

kelliope
Nov. 16, 2007, 02:01 PM
Not to hop on and start the millionth helemt debate but, when I hear someone died in a car accident the first thing that crosses my mind is "I wonder if they were wearing their seatbelt?". When I hear someone died in a riding accident as a result of major head trauma, I ask myself "I wonder if they were wearing a helmet?".

I don't think it shoud be considered out of line to wonder if someone was wearing either. Seatbelts can save lives and so can helmets.

I am very saddened to hear of this young person's passing. It seems she was quite talented and had a bright future ahead of her. My condolences to her fiance, friends, family and coworkers.

I have to agree with you 100%. I cannot stand people getting all judgy about helmet wearing. I, personally, am not one bit judgemental about anyone choosing to not wear a helmet. I never wear one myself unless required when I trailer in to a barn. I am also a big proponent of free choice. However, I did find myself wondering this very thing. It just seems so odd to think of a dressage rider needing a helmet. Isn't that weird that I think that? I would never jump without a helmet, yet I ride dressage every day without one.

I also found myself wishing I had put my helmet on last night. Mine doesn't fit well and gives me a migraine, but I do think I will be trying some new ones to see if I can find something comfortable.

My sincere sympathies go to the family, fiance, friends and students of Miss Webber. It truly is a tragedy to lose someone so young, full of life and obviously quite talented. Ride on dear Kristin.

perpetual_novice
Nov. 16, 2007, 04:43 PM
I think what might be driving the need of some posters to wonder aloud if Kristin was wearing a helmet at the time of the accident comes more from the fact that many of us very dearly recognize how dangerous this sport of riding can become at any moment.

I don't think anyone here, if they really examined their motives for wanting to know, wants to tsk tsk anyone for getting hurt. I think the more experienced among us know that no one is immune from injury, in life in general or specifically around the horses.

But, it is very human to want to put order to or be able to explain something so devastating, that someone could be injured badly or killed when working/riding horses, because we all recognize, whether we want to face it or not, that that person could have been us. Because we all work/ride horses. And if we can find a way to minimize the randomness of these events, because we all know that "it" could strike us at any moment, many of us will do that. Either obviously, such as posting to this thread, or more subconsciously.

So, whenever we hear about such an accident, which could have happened to any of us as much as it happened to Kristin, I think it's very natural to want to know the surrounding circumstances. It's human to want to be able NOT to feel powerless in the face of such incidences. I'm sure some people say it's not appropriate or it's tactless to ask such questions so close to the incident, but that's for another thread, I guess.

I think that your analysis of the situation is absolutely valid, however, even though it is natural for humans to try to make sense of a situation and to attempt to seek reasons for a tragedy, I do feel that people should restrain themselves from making such comments aloud or typing them up and sending them off to an Internet Board. Yes it's natural to think these things but it is insensitive and sociably unacceptable to say or write it at this time. Would someone ask "the helmet question" directly to a family member during visitation or after the funeral? I would certainly hope not.

It is not up to family and friends of the victim to make us feel secure in the universe. They have their grief to deal with right now.

cyberbay
Nov. 16, 2007, 06:14 PM
Not to worry, P. Novice. Never said that the friends or family were to reassure the rest of us. And I don't disagree with you about the timing of the 'wanting to know.' (How that would be done, not sure).

I put up that post mostly to help stop the bashing of people who asked about the helmet -- b/c I think, in the end, we all want to know. (And this isn't a long-winded way of trying to find out, either.) ...Am trying to get the unhappy icon to print here, but it goes up to the title line instead. Anyhow, -unhappy face- about the whole situation.

RodeoQueen
Nov. 16, 2007, 06:29 PM
Condolences and prayers to Kristin's family, friends and fiance. What a heartbreaking tragedy. May we each be humbled and remain thankful for every time we hang up our tack and come in from the barn safe. The nature of our passion makes us susceptible to injury and we must all keep on our toes when handling even the smallest of babies and "brokest" of horses.

Prayers to all her knew her for strength during such a difficult time.

magienoire
Nov. 16, 2007, 06:36 PM
my deepest sympathies to her family and friends, and her colleagues in the industry. very very sad news.

LE
Nov. 16, 2007, 08:05 PM
perhaps start a new thread in regards to helmet usage outside of this thread? This seems to have been made to give condolences to the loss of this young lady.

minnie
Nov. 16, 2007, 09:33 PM
My condolences to the family. Personally, I don't think it's insensitive or tactless to learn whether or not she were wearing a helmet. If someone else learns to wear a protective helmet from this incidence, just one day may make the difference for that one person should they suffer a fall. I'm sure that in spite of their grief, no, BECAUSE of their grief, this family would advocate that every single person getting on a horse should wear a protective helmet. If this tragedy is a catalyst for others who haven't felt the need to wear a helmet to change, then perhaps her death wasn't in vain.

YankeeLawyer
Nov. 16, 2007, 09:47 PM
The very sad truth is that helmets will not reduce the chance of serious head injury. They only reduce/mitigate minor head injuries.


That is just not true, and even if it were true, why would anyone choose to risk a "minor" head injuy that could be prevented. In any event, I don't particularly want to add to the helmet debate here, but I couldn't let that statement go by.

MaryhelenM
Nov. 16, 2007, 10:32 PM
We lost a great horsewoman recently. The horror of the loss is huge. I wish our postings on the internet could be heard by the family. It is so sad that one of us loose life because of our love of this sport. But at the same time all of us talk about what happened and how could we not have this happen to us. We are human. My community lost a friend to an unfortunate accident, but we all learned something from this loss. I think the discussion is important. And even the family talks about how it happened. We don't honor anybody by ignoring this discussion. What do you do with tragedy. Try to learn from it? change it? remember it?

Meredith Clark
Nov. 16, 2007, 10:51 PM
I shared this story with one of my good friends who I ride with and I decided to finally take my GPA speed air back to the tack store because even though I liked the way it looked it just didn't fit me correctly, now I have a properly fitting, ugly, safe skull cap that will be on my head every time my butt is in the saddle.

I'm so sorry this happened to her but I will learn from it

firefloyd
Nov. 16, 2007, 11:15 PM
This is very sad. I really think hope it is a comfort to the family that this young woman died doing what she loved. I'm sure right now it is not comforting at all, though.

I don't think it is at all inappropriate to talk about the helmet issue. Nobody is judging her for not wearing a helmet. I'm sure that everybody, at some point or another, has either gone without a helmet or really wished they could. I know sometimes I really miss riding on the trail with a baseball cap. But helmets help protect your head, period.

Its interesting that people can die from heart disease (my dad was one), and in their memory, we can adovcate that everybody should take better care of themselves to prevent that (and I do advocate that, I remember being livid that he had not taken better care of himself)... but if we do that in this case, its considered disrespectful by some. Why? Its not a judgment, its just a recognition of tragedy coupled with a desire to prevent it.

YankeeLawyer
Nov. 17, 2007, 12:20 AM
This is very sad. I really think hope it is a comfort to the family that this young woman died doing what she loved. I'm sure right now it is not comforting at all, though.

I don't think it is at all inappropriate to talk about the helmet issue. Nobody is judging her for not wearing a helmet. I'm sure that everybody, at some point or another, has either gone without a helmet or really wished they could. I know sometimes I really miss riding on the trail with a baseball cap. But helmets help protect your head, period.

Its interesting that people can die from heart disease (my dad was one), and in their memory, we can adovcate that everybody should take better care of themselves to prevent that (and I do advocate that, I remember being livid that he had not taken better care of himself)... but if we do that in this case, its considered disrespectful by some. Why? Its not a judgment, its just a recognition of tragedy coupled with a desire to prevent it.

I agree, and my dad also passed away from a heart condition that might have been mitigated by better lifestyle choices. Everyone in my family advocates better practices because of it.

I do wear a helmet but admit sometimes I would prefer not to. It is the very, very sad stories like these that remind me to wear it.

My deepest condolences to this young woman's family and friends.

2boys
Nov. 17, 2007, 08:13 AM
I shared this story with one of my good friends who I ride with and I decided to finally take my GPA speed air back to the tack store because even though I liked the way it looked it just didn't fit me correctly, now I have a properly fitting, ugly, safe skull cap that will be on my head every time my butt is in the saddle.

I'm so sorry this happened to her but I will learn from it

GOOD FOR YOU MEREDITH. ;)

Firefloyd, you made an EXCELLENT point.

Sister Margarita
Nov. 17, 2007, 09:48 AM
How very tragic. It is something I fear everyday, especially during those fleeting moments of horses' extreme reactions that we are open to. My prayers are with the family and friends of this talented and lovely young woman.

I am sure that if this thread was meant as a condolence communication to the family and friends solely, it could be just that; and the posters could direct those questioning (as I did) whether a safety issue discussion could come of this to another thread if all felt that most appropriate. I would be a useful legacy to this talented woman if someone benefitted in the future. I have been severely hurt, and hope that my situation could be a learning tool for others. We all have the right to disagree.

Please let's not be judgmental of one another. If I were involved in an accident, hurt or worse, I would not want that judgmentalism to be a result of my tragedy or misfortune. I would want people to come together or learn from my misfortune, something good from something bad.

We all can learn from this, if nothing more than to treasure every moment; and if another thread is most comfortable for everyone, let's do it constructively and conciously. I am really more uncomfortable with some of the preaching of what is "right". Are any of us in a position to make that call?

SillyHorse
Nov. 17, 2007, 11:45 AM
I am sure that if this thread was meant as a condolence communication to the family and friends solely, it could be just that.
A true condolence communication is a personal one, whether spoken in person or through a note of sympathy, not an "I'm so sorry" typed on an internet bulletin board. That's why I'm mystified that some people think this thread is sacrosanct.

ESG
Nov. 17, 2007, 07:43 PM
It isn't sacrosanct, but it would be a nice change if we could all just express condolences, and not turn a tragedy into an excuse to step onto the helmet vs. no helmet soapbox. :rolleyes:

There is a time and a place for everything. This time and place is for condolences.

Carry on.

DownYonder
Nov. 18, 2007, 07:50 AM
Does anyone know if Kristin is related to Cindi Webber? We had a mare owned by Cindi at our Oldenburg inspection this year. My trainer says that Kristin was there, but I was so busy helping the inspectors that I didn't get a chance to meet all the participants.

eks
Nov. 18, 2007, 01:16 PM
My prayers are with her family, fiance and friends at this time....

slc2
Nov. 18, 2007, 01:30 PM
For some at a time like this manners and etiquette have more importance than banging the wear-a-helmet drum.

There still is a place for manners, even on the internet. The family can read, and they can read the internet, and out of concern for their feelings, some people would be polite enough to not start loudly and publicly finger pointing and gossiping til a few weeks after the funeral.

We've had several very unpleasant tragedies in our family and I was quite appalled by people's manners, asking for grisly details right after the event, both in person and on the internet. When my mother was killed, they immediately wanted to know all sorts of medical details and how she acted just as she died, and whose fault the accident was. Give it a rest, people. A family death is painful enough in and of itself. There is still a place for manners and concern for others, even on the internet. People's activities and behavior on the internet have a sort of habitual momentum that may from time to time cloud their view of what manners are.

minnie
Nov. 18, 2007, 01:47 PM
For heaven's sake, no one is publickly finger pointing or gossiping. People are saying what a tragedy this is and what can we do to try to keep it from happening to someone else.

coloredhorse
Nov. 18, 2007, 01:47 PM
Its interesting that people can die from heart disease (my dad was one), and in their memory, we can adovcate that everybody should take better care of themselves to prevent that (and I do advocate that, I remember being livid that he had not taken better care of himself)... but if we do that in this case, its considered disrespectful by some. Why? Its not a judgment, its just a recognition of tragedy coupled with a desire to prevent it.

But how does it make the mourners feel to hear (or read) these comments? About any death? I have lost three people -- grandfather to heart disease many years ago, uncle to AIDS somewhat later, and FIL to lung cancer more recently -- to early deaths that probably were caused solely by their lifestyle choices. And I will say it was hurtful to those of us who were mourning to hear -- whether told directly or just overheard -- all the "if only" statements. Sorry folks, regardless of your bright and shiny intentions, to those whose grief is raw, it sounds like blaming the victim. And that hurts the ones left behind who loved that person. There are those on this board who knew Ms. Webber and are feeling her loss keenly.

I believe, as cyberbay suggested earlier on this thread, that the focus on "how could this have been prevented" is primarily motivated by the natural human desire to feel a sense of control over and order in tragedy. But this is when we exercise a small amount of impulse control. Hold it in, bring it up later, in a different venue, whatever. In this instance, there have been zillions of helmet threads on this BB and will be zillions more, no doubt. It's not like all the pro-helmet debaters out there lack venues for expression of their opinions.

To friends and family of Ms. Webber, deepest condolences. I know she will be missed.

Tory Relic
Nov. 18, 2007, 02:50 PM
But how does it make the mourners feel to hear (or read) these comments? About any death? I have lost three people -- grandfather to heart disease many years ago, uncle to AIDS somewhat later, and FIL to lung cancer more recently -- to early deaths that probably were caused solely by their lifestyle choices. And I will say it was hurtful to those of us who were mourning to hear -- whether told directly or just overheard -- all the "if only" statements. Sorry folks, regardless of your bright and shiny intentions, to those whose grief is raw, it sounds like blaming the victim. And that hurts the ones left behind who loved that person. There are those on this board who knew Ms. Webber and are feeling her loss keenly.

I believe, as cyberbay suggested earlier on this thread, that the focus on "how could this have been prevented" is primarily motivated by the natural human desire to feel a sense of control over and order in tragedy. But this is when we exercise a small amount of impulse control. Hold it in, bring it up later, in a different venue, whatever. In this instance, there have been zillions of helmet threads on this BB and will be zillions more, no doubt. It's not like all the pro-helmet debaters out there lack venues for expression of their opinions.

To friends and family of Ms. Webber, deepest condolences. I know she will be missed.

I couldn't have said it better myself.

My deepest condolences to the friends and family of Ms. Webber.

dcwebber@bellsouth.net
Jun. 18, 2008, 01:37 PM
I just found this thread on the internet and read all the condolances. Thank you for caring.

I would however like to comment on several things.
First, she had just turned 22 on September 29, Her wedding was to be Dec. 15, 2007, four weeks away. She and her fiance had just bought a house on Friday. She was still living at home.

No, she did not have on a helmet. Often she did wear a helmet and I was most outspoken about it when she did not. She has had her share of falls during her riding career and has never had an injury until Nov. 13. 2007. I have not had whatever it takes to ask the doctors if wearing a helmet would have mattered in this case. There is the liklihood that it would not have mattered. I am not offended by your questions in this as it was one of my first questions as well.

Kristin had a personal relationship with the Lord. As a young girl, she recognized that nothing she could do was good enough to earn her way into Heaven. She knew that God sent His only Son who was perfect to die for her sins or lack of goodness. She accepted that free gift for herself. This alone is what allows her to now enjoy eternity in Heaven. He is who she strove to honor and obey in all that she did on this earth. I believe she was exactly where she was supposed to be that day. This was not an accident. God knew the number of her days before she was ever conceived. So why did He allow this to happen? I can't fully say but I do know God does not allow anythig to happen to his children that he does't first sift through his fingers of love. He wants what is best for us though sometimes it doesn't make sense to us at the time. If Kristin could ask you anything, it would be this. "If you were to die today, do you know where you would spend eternity?" That is what mattered most to her. If her accident and death where what resulted in others having the assurance that they would spend Eternity in Heaven, she would say it was all worth it. As her mom, nothing would give me greater joy than to know that her life made a difference in yours. Feel free to contact me at dcwebber@bellsouth.net.

Blkarab
Jun. 18, 2008, 03:20 PM
My deepest condolences to her family and friends.

:(

ScotTNMe
Jun. 18, 2008, 04:08 PM
This is terrible a tragedy especially when it happens to such a young girl with her whole life ahead of her :cry:. My deepest sympathies to her family and all who knew her.

Yes it was an ACCIDENT and accidents will happen around horses. I'll try not to get on the helmet soapbox but I always wear one now. I learned the hard way - I didn't suffer a serious injury but I was lucky. I even wear a helmet when "riding" my retiree while he shuffles around at a walk and a little trot.

seabreeze
Jun. 18, 2008, 04:34 PM
Kristin had a personal relationship with the Lord. As a young girl, she recognized that nothing she could do was good enough to earn her way into Heaven. She knew that God sent His only Son who was perfect to die for her sins or lack of goodness. She accepted that free gift for herself. This alone is what allows her to now enjoy eternity in Heaven. He is who she strove to honor and obey in all that she did on this earth. I believe she was exactly where she was supposed to be that day. This was not an accident. God knew the number of her days before she was ever conceived. So why did He allow this to happen? I can't fully say but I do know God does not allow anythig to happen to his children that he does't first sift through his fingers of love. He wants what is best for us though sometimes it doesn't make sense to us at the time. If Kristin could ask you anything, it would be this. "If you were to die today, do you know where you would spend eternity?" That is what mattered most to her. If her accident and death where what resulted in others having the assurance that they would spend Eternity in Heaven, she would say it was all worth it. As her mom, nothing would give me greater joy than to know that her life made a difference in yours. Feel free to contact me at dcwebber@bellsouth.net.

:):):):):):):):):):)

riverbell93
Jun. 18, 2008, 04:48 PM
What a sad story.

I confess, I immediately wondered about the helmet issue, but I'd have never asked. Questions about things like helmets and seat belts and weight and other lifestyle issues are like asking the mourner "So, how sad do I really need to be?"